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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24490675">10 Ways To Save The Galaxy</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spoofymcgee/pseuds/Spoofymcgee'>Spoofymcgee</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Anakin Skywalker Needs a Hug, Anakin Skywalker On the Jedi Council, Breakfast, Crack Treated Seriously, F/F, F/M, Fix-It, Flower Crowns, Fluff, Force-Sensitive Clones (Star Wars), Force-Sensitive Jango Fett, Gen, M/M, MerMay, Obi-Wan Kenobi Needs a Hug, Palpatine made a mistake, Sort Of, Space YouTube, Wingfic, a big one, because his plans are now a trainwreck, don't be so evil maybe palps, he deserves it, in the ninth one, jango is a dad, language lessons, no beta we die like Jedi, palps is sitting is the background fuming, you might get more done if you weren't so extra</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 08:07:17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>37,111</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24490675</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spoofymcgee/pseuds/Spoofymcgee</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>my attempt at writing 101 ways to fix star wars.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Anakin Skywalker &amp; Ahsoka Tano, Anakin Skywalker &amp; Mace Windu, Anakin Skywalker &amp; Shmi Skywalker, Barriss Offee/Ahsoka Tano, Boba Fett &amp; Ahsoka Tano, Boba Fett &amp; Jango Fett, CC-2224 | Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi, CT-7567 | Rex &amp; Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi &amp; Ahsoka Tano, Obi-Wan Kenobi &amp; Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi/CT-7567 | Rex, Padmé Amidala/Anakin Skywalker, but like in different stories</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>84</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>238</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. How Friendships Saved The Galaxy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Get out a bit, they said. Go have some fun with General Skywalker, they said. Nobody mentioned anything about nearly ramming my speeder through a building." Obi-Wan grumbles, taking another corner sharply and barely avoiding a couple dozen blaster bolts aimed at Anakin's head.<br/>"Well I'm sorry Master, but did you expect me to just sit there and watch them drag that girl wherever?" His former padawan retorts-though it has no bite-while poking his head out the side of the vehicle to glance at the one gaining on them. "They're getting closer.<br/>"Anakin, get your head in the the speeder!" Obi-Wan momentarily lifts a hand from the controls to pull his companion down before continuing his complaint. "No, but perhaps you could have found a way to help her without angering half the Corsucanti underworld?"<br/>"I don't think so Master." All of his attention is on a particularly tricky set of turns, but he can still hear the cheeky grin on Anakin's face, even if he couldn't see it. A single blast nicks the flank of their ride, pulling a groan from Obi-Wan.<br/>"Cody is going to try make me paint that over myself I'd like you to know, Anakin. And when he does, you'll be spending a week searching through every single hovercraft repair store on the planet to find the exact shade he wants."<br/>"No need, Master. I've still got leftover from two months ago when Grevious slashed up my starfighter two deployments ago. I'm pretty sure they're the same color." Again with the cheek. The next turn is much sharper than it has to be, completely for the sake of gaining some distance from their pursers, and not at all to throw Anakin against the side of the speeder.<br/>"Master!" The younger man protests once he's upright again. "I promised Ahsoka I'd do hand to hand with her tomorrow!"<br/>"Well that should give her some advantage, no? After all, what's a grandmaster for if not to spoil you?" Obi-Wan says absently, more focused on spiraling their hovercraft to avoid more scorch marks then the conversation.<br/>There's a short pause, then-<br/>"Is that what Dooku was trying to do when he chained you to that wall?" The Knight asks, voice filled with mischief poorly disguised by faked comprehension.<br/>"Anakin, no-"<br/>"Maybe it was a surprise party!"<br/>"I didn't mean-"<br/>"I bet all those knives and the torture droids were just birthday presents!"<br/>"Stop, I need to focus-"<br/>"I mean, it was a good five months after your birthday but next time we can just leave you there and-"<br/>"<em>Anakin</em>! Shut <em>up!</em>" He flares up, barely jerking out of the way as a hunk of duracrete hurtles past the windshield. The younger Jedi shuts his mouth with a snap, and they make it out with only a few scratches and some sparks.<br/>He doesn't open it again until they're well away from the criminals and nearly back to the Temple.<br/>"I'm sorry Master. I was out of line. I shouldn't have gone that far." he grimances, tugging the skin of his left wrist with his mechanical arm. There's a pause.<br/>"You know I always encourage you to speak your mind, Anakin." Obi-Wan says, switching lanes to a slower one.<br/>"Yes." he answers tentatively.<br/>"I understand that we were in a stressful situation at the time, an you tend to spew offensive trash at everyone in the vicinity when under pressure," the bearded man pauses to consider remarking on how Senator Amidala is the singular exception, but decides against it. Anakin will tell him when he's ready. "Most probably a by product of too many fights in which insults do occasionally distract your enemies. However, I still have to ask, do you really intend to leave me to Count Dooku's mercies if he manages to capture me again?"<br/>"No! Of course not! I didn't actually-" Skywalker protests, before seeing the glint in his former Master's eye. He aims a light punch at Obi-Wan's shoulder.<br/>"Don't hit the driver. Perhaps I should send Dooku a Lifeday card. Is there a grandmaster's holiday?" Obi-Wan questions, and they meander their way back home under the bright lights of the Corsucanti traffic, making light of the darkness around them.</p><p>On the Zhellsday before Lifeday, a couple years later, an extraordinarily confused Dooku receives a card from a certain Obi-Wan Kenobi, wishing his grandmaster a good year and congratulating him on losing the war.</p><p>Meanwhile, at the Temple...<br/>Fifteen Jedi guards and no less protect the former Chancellor's cell, while Anakin and Padme coo over the newly born twins with Obi-Wan. Anakin plans to resign from the Order the next morning to spend some time simply being a husband and father.<br/>I think it's safe to say that the real heroes of this story are Cody and Rex, for their strict policies on making sure Anakin and Obi-Wan continued tending to their friendship even throughout the war and maintained Adult Communication ™. Either way, everyone's happy with how things turned out. Except, perhaps, Sheev.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. How Cooking Classes With Mace Windu Saved The Galaxy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Hey Master, what time is it?" Anakin asks, looking up from his caf. The information for his next joint mission with Obi-Wan was splayed across the polished transparisteel tabletop.<br/>
"Thirty minutes into the 19th hour." His former master replies, glancing at the wall chrono and then back to the maps and files spread across the surface. Anakin shoots up, knocking his cup to the ground.<br/>
"I'm gonna be late!" he grabs his commlink from the couch arm and rushes towards the door.<br/>
Obi-Wan, having utilized the Force, to catch the mug and set it safely on the table, questions his former padawan's sudden outburst.<br/>
"Late for what, Anakin?" The younger man pauses, hand hovering over the panel to open the door.<br/>
"Cooking class with Master Windu." he mutters reluctantly, shifting. There's a short pause, then-<br/>
"I must have hit my head on the doorframe harder than I thought. Because I just heard you say you were voluntarily going to spend time with Master Mace Windu, my friend, for whom you have a deep rooted mistrust and dislike." Obi-Wan responds slowly.<br/>
"I-" Before he could reply, Anakin's commlink chimed. Holding it up to his ear, he tilted his head to listen. Obi-Wan can recognize Mace's clear tone, but not make out the words. Distancing the device from his ear, Anakin stalks back to the couch and sat.<br/>
"Master Windu says he got held up in a meeting, and to come at the beginning of the 20th hour instead," he says, a little tersely.<br/>
"In that case you have time to explain to me how you ended up taking cooking classes, of all things, from the Master of the Order." Obi-Wan decides, taking a sip of tea and lifting is gaze from the flimsi to Anakin's, the younger man backlight by settling twilight.<br/>
"I guess I do, don't I?" he sighs heavily, leaning further back into the ivory cushions. "Well it all started like this..."<br/>
...<br/>
Two men sit on separate beds in the Halls of Healing belonging to the Jedi Temple on Corsucant. One of them, beige robes contrasting with his darker skin, sits on the edge. His calves are bandaged in pristine white, and he doesn't look particularly happy. The other, blond hair falling lightly on the collar of his black garb, sits cross legged. His right arm ends in a stump at the elbow, and his left is occupied with carefully tinkering with the prosthetic lying across his lap. His head is wrapped in bandages, but stopped bleeding about half an hour ago.<br/>
"This is your fault, Skywalker." The elder flares up suddenly. "If you hadn't pulled that punch against the shapeshifter-"<br/>
"Well my apologies for not feeling a particular desire to break my-Senator Amidala's nose!" Anakin responds, and it has bite. He shouldn't speak to Master Windu this way but- "And besides, it's not like smacking me in the head with that hunk of duracrete helped much, Master."<br/>
"For the last time it was aimed-"<br/>
"Master Windu," A tall, Twi'lek interrupts him, tone cold. "And Knight Skywalker."<br/>
"Healer Che, how nice to see you." All of the sudden Mace's tone is honey-sweet, as charming as once could be paired with his stormy visage.<br/>
"I could say the same to you, Master Windu, but I seem to recall giving you explicit instructions not to injure yourself for the next two weeks." 
His demeanor falters in the face of her own, stony as it was.<br/>
"And you!" she exclaims, turning on Anakin. "Didn't I promise you I'd shave a pattern of gundarks onto your head if you got another concussion before your next deployment?"<br/>
Anakin's eyes go wide and he drops the screwdriver in an attempt to scramble backwards, keep hold of his mechanical arm and protect his hair with the other all at the same time.<br/>
She pauses for a moment, long enough that Mace speaks up again.<br/>
"I assume you've already decided on 'appropriate' consequences for our injuries then?"<br/>
Her smile is purely predatory, an impressive feat with blunt teeth.<br/>
"Consequences? Oh no, just one." Anakin is pressed against the wall at this point, not at all ashamed of his terror. "If I'm not mistaken, Master Windu, you dabble in several types of cuisine, including plenty of dishes with medical benefits?" His silence is enough for her. "Knight Skywalker, I'm assigning you to biweekly cooking classes with Master Windu, either in person or over comm. All those you miss are in stock to any and all Jedi healer at any time the two of you are both available. Your first session can be now."<br/>
Anakin's jaw might hit the floor at this rate and Mace's head is simply bowed in submission. Even he knows not to protest against the healer's orders.<br/>
"But Healer Che!" The younger man objects, waving his malfunctioning arm slightly.<br/>
"You have five functional limbs and the Force between you, I'm sure you'll figure it ou,." she says, dispassionate to his complaint.<br/>
"How long?" Mace asks, hoping, perhaps, for a reprieve from the miserable sentence in a few months.<br/>
"Until I say otherwise," Is the final straw that breaks the back of their eopie of dissention.</p><p>Minutes later, they're garnering stares as Anakin carefully maneuvers Mace's wheelchair down the hallway, into turbolift and up towards the latter's quarters. His tibias may be healed of their fractures, but he's under very strict orders to stay off his feet for thirty six hours.<br/>
"Why do we have to go to your quarters?" The blond pokes petulantly, an unhappy from decorating his face.<br/>
"Because I happen to know that Knight quarters don't have a kitchen, and I prefer not to be in the same room as Knight Mano and her kitchen experiments." Anakin winces.<br/>
"Is that what those explosions are? It sounded like thermal detonators!"<br/>
"Exactly," Mace says, and they walk in silence towards the room, with only a few minor interruptions when Anakin's arm glitches and sends the elder careening towards a group of tired masters who ignore them, as if this is a daily occurrence.</p><p>"First, you can put your prosthetic here if you're taking it off. If not, at least don't mix with it. I would prefer not to clean firebud muffin batter off the walls with fractured tibias." Mace's tone is polite, if tired and a bit dry. Anakin places his arm on the aforementioned dresser.<br/>
"Is that what we're making, master?" The younger man asks stiffly, pushing the chair into the kitchen.<br/>
"Yes. There should be some large bowls in that drawer, and you need to get the Westhills butter out of the refrigerator because we need it room temperature..."</p><p>Many Jedi retuning to the Temple later that night were greeted with the surprise of a somewhat rumpled and grumpy Knight Skywalker handing out freshly baked muffins. At that hour of night, you don't question the origin of baked goods. You just say thank you and eat them. </p><p>...<br/>
"And since then, every healer's has been blalantly abusing the ability to stick Master Windu and I in a room together and get fresh cookies out of it." Anakin concluded, finishing his caf, cold by now.<br/>
"So that's where you were on-"<br/>
"Yes."<br/>
"And-"<br/>
"Yes."<br/>
"Last Zhellsday-"<br/>
"Also yes."<br/>
"Any healer?" Obi-Wan questioned curiously, for a change. His former padawan groaned.<br/>
"Yes, including the padawans." He mumbled, dropping his face into his palms.<br/>
...<br/>
The Senate room is as huge and cold as ever, the unceasing drone of voices in the background nearly deranging. A small group of Jedi Masters and padawans, with a few Knights sprinkled in for variety stand a ways away from the Supreme Chancellor. All of them should be sleeping their leave away, or planning for the next deployment, but the Order makes a point to have a presence at every meeting.<br/>
"Of course, Chancellor. It'd be an honor to have last meal with you." This is what Barriss Offee, standing with the rest of the Jedi Temple's delegation to the Senate meeting, overhears Anakin saying to Chancellor Palpatine. Thinking back, she recalls Ahsoka telling her that she disliked the man and the effect he had on her master. Perhaps... Perhaps if Barriss rescues Knight Skywalker from the Chancellor, Ahsoka will be more likely to agree if Barriss builds up the courage to ask her... To go somewhere. For dinner, maybe. Possibly as a date.<br/>
"I'm sorry Chancellor, but Knight Skywalker has an urgent meeting with the master of the Order. I'm sure you've met Master Windu?" Barriss asks sweetly, completely innocent of the glare she can feel Anakin giving her through the force.<br/>
"Padawan Offee-" He starts, trying (and failing) to keep his tone even.<br/>
"Or I could tell Master Healer Che that-" she begins to offer, and he recoils.<br/>
"No, no. I'm going. Apologies, sir. Another time?"<br/>
"Yes, yes. Definitely, my boy." Palpatine answer, sounding somewhat suspicious, if distracted.</p><p>Anakin goes to great lengths to make sure none of the shuura fruit meringue ends up in Barriss's hands.</p><p>She gets some anyway. (From Ahsoka, who brought it as dessert on the picnic date she surprised Barriss with when she'd heard the story from Master Secura.)<br/>
...<br/>
Obi-Wan hid a smile, though not very well.<br/>
"Why are you so excited for today's class, though?" He asks.<br/>
"... We're learning a traditional Nubian dish today." Obi-Wan grins, wide and slightly teasing.<br/>
"Shut up."<br/>
"I didn't say anything, Anakin."<br/>
"Shut up."<br/>
"It's ten to eight, you should be off." The younger grudgingly agreed, slouching out the door.<br/>
"And Anakin?"<br/>
"Yeah, Master?"<br/>
"Tell Senator Amidala I say hello."<br/>
Obi-Wan dodges and catches the potted plant flung at his head, but doesn't account for the cushions smacking him in the back of the head.</p><p>The war drags on longer than it might have in a different universe, one where Anakin hadn't been the only other Jedi available to accompany Mace Windu on an emergency mission on Corsucant one night. One where neither had gotten injured, assigned cooking classes and one where they hadn't formed a makeshift friendship over late night brownies.<br/>
All the same, it ends eventually. Palpatine, fed up with half the Jedi order (really just the same few healers, but he doesn't pay much attention to Force-sensitives with lesser powers) constantly whisking his desired apprentice away from him. He slips up, let's his anger bleed through his shields. They take him into custody, and when a though investigation of his personal affairs reveals a personal channel to Count Dooku alongside many crimes and illegal ventures, he is-post a lengthy trial, because it wouldn't be the Republic if everything didn't take as long as possible-executed for treason.<br/>
Anakin Skywalker remains with the Order, as a mostly inactive member. He doesn't take missions unless absolutely necessary, and fulfills his duties with plenty of shifts in the creche and teaching padawan and youngling classes. Luke and Leia grow up with both their parents, in a Republic undergoing a very large moral overhaul.<br/>
It's not perfect, but it's close enough.</p><p>And every now and then, for old times sake, Mace and Anakin will bake something together.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. How Boots From Rex Saved The Galaxy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>MerMay thingamabob.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So, I technically started this on May 31st, and I'm only a day late. I kind love this one, hope all of you will like it. Also people are apparently reading my book, so thank you so much to all of you I really wasn't expecting to get any hits at all.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><em>The first time someone told </em><em>Shmi</em><em> they were sorry about her son, he was thirty minutes old. </em><br/>
The med droid from her owner had just left, after inserting her son with a slavery chip. She lay exhaustedly on the cot, awaiting the Twi'lek midwife she'd hired for two days rations.<br/>
"Skywalker." The red skinned woman appears next to her, a tiny bundle swaddled in her arms.<br/>
"Bril. I would like to hold my son, if you don't mind."<br/>
"I-Shmi, he's a mer." Her blunt tone isn't softened by the (in her opinion) devastating information it conveys. "I'm sorry."<br/>
The human woman closes her eyes, inhaling deeply. <br/>
"Don't be." They snap open, and she reaches for her child.<br/>
                                            ...<br/>
Anakin doesn't have many constants in his life. He's on his third master in ten short years of life, which has meant repeated changes in housing, food source, location and even occupation. Two things are always the same, though; his mother and the water.<br/>
She promised him that they'd never be separated, ever. He believes her.<br/>
It's always the same amount, every day. And then there's the nights, once a month, that greet her pale, shivery and swaying, having saved up just enough water to splash on his legs and watch them scale in blue and red. <br/>
He's a mer, she tells him. And not to tell the master, she says that too. Because he needs more water than most, and no slave owner wants that.<br/>
                                             ...<br/>
The first time someone disappears because of it is when he's seven. <br/>
"<em>It's not your fault, Anakin." </em>The other child tells him. <em>"It's just not worth it, being close with someone who's going to die." </em><br/>
<em>"I'm not going to die!" </em>He argues back, angrily, sounding much more confident than he is.<br/>
<em>"Am I going to die?" </em>His fears take the form of a late night query asked of his mother in a trembling voice.<br/>
<em>"I hope not, Ani." </em>She sighs, wrapping her arms around him. <em>"I really hope not."</em><br/>
                                              ...<br/>
<em>Anakin and </em><em>Obi-Wan are on their second mission in as many months. The former is in a very bad mood, brow furrowed as he leaps</em> <em>exhaustedly</em><em> from patch to patch of dryish land and over the soggy, wet marsh.</em><em>Obi-Wan is distracting him with a quiz about the Unifying Force, and there are a few things Anakin would like to call him if he had the attention to spare.</em></p><p>"And what about the Force did Lord Kaan describe using the term 'twilight' during the Ruusan campaign?"<br/>
"Uhm, how it's not light or," Grunt, as he jumped across a particularly large wet spot. "Dark, but in between."<br/>
"And how does the philosophy of the Unifying Force derive from that of the Living Force?" Is Obi-Wan's next question, and he trudges serenely through the brackety water.<br/>
"Master!" Anakin complains as he nearly misses the next sand bar.<br/>
"Come now, Anakin, you know this." He's long since given up on convincing the boy to just get wet, as it hadn't worked the first million and a half times.<br/>
"To keep your eyes open for," A touch of the Force carries him to the sheltered spot of unsoaked earth and he feels his Master's disapproving look at his back. It doesn't matter, because if Obi-Wan found out, he'd send Anakin back to Tattooine, for being like he is. A little disappointment is fine. "Future possibilities, and uh, not just focus on the moment."<br/>
The copper haired man nods, and falls silent long enough that the beginning of his next question causes Anakin to slip, falling in a puddle of swampy water.<br/>
He barely has thirty seconds to kneel next to the child preparing to help him up, and become distracted by the terror filling the younger's sky blue eyes.<br/>
Anakin's on his back, eyes closed. He can feel the sticky water on his fins, and the ripples hitting his forearm scales. Eyes closed, he prepares himself for Obi-Wan's gasp of displeasure, for shouting and yelling, for being sent back to the dusty, hot sandball he'd know as home for the first ten years. What he gets is much different.<br/>
"Oh, Anakin." Obi-Wan sighs tenderly, and lifts the ten year old in his arms. "We're not sending you home." Right. He'll have to remember he's got someone else in his head now. "Why would you think that?"<br/>
"Because mers are bad luck." The young boy states, like it's a fact he's always known. "They die quickly, cause you have to change once a month to stay healthy." It strikes Obi-Wan, that needing more water is bad on a desert planet. But why in all the Sithing hells didn't Qui-Gon tell him? He'd looked at Anakin's blood tests, and while Obi-Wan didn't know how to identify mers by blood sample, his Master most definitely did.<br/>
"Oh, no, Anakin. They're special. Mers are- Wait, once a month? What did you do last month?" Continuing to stumble through the swamp back to their ship, the elder waits for Anakin's answer. The latter, having realized that Obi-Wan doesn't hate him, buries his face in the former's robes, so his answer is muffled.<br/>
"Sink." Of course, of course. Why not.<br/>
"Padawan, when we get back to the temple, remind me to show you the Room of a Thousand Fountains. There are plenty of mers among the Jedi, and I've been told most of them spend a lot of time there."</p><p>Obi-Wan survived on caf alone for three days straight, scouring the holonet, and more discreetly, the Archives, for any information at all about mers. Reflecting later, Anakin understand that while he could have just asked any of the know mer Masters or Knights, he respected Anakin's desire not to have people know.<br/>
                                    ...<br/>
The pool is as peaceful as ever, and the faint but constant vibrations coming from the twin waterfalls thundering a few dozen meters to the north of Anakin calm him as he works through a few underwater katas.<br/>
Obi-Wan hunted them out for him, sneaking the datapad out of the library in a rule-breaking move much harped on by his fourteen year old padawan.<br/>
There are, as the name suggests, a thousand fountains in the room, and this one is rather farther back. No one else has interrupted him in the four years he's been using it, and so he's very much not expecting it when another person dives into the water, lower half shimmering as it shifts from two clothed appendages to eight purple ones, powering fifty meters deep in mere seconds.<br/>
He freezes, and then begins to swim upwards as fast as his tail would carry him. Unfortunately, being much younger and with yet weak tail muscles, he doesn't make it far.<br/>
"My apologies Padawan, I didn't realize there was someone else here. Don't leave on my account." The louder underwater voice carries through the distance. Anakin freezes, and kriff <em>kriff</em> <em>KRIFF</em> , did it have to be him? Why couldn't it have been someone like Master Koon, or Knight Vos? Why did it have to be Mace Kriffing Windu?<br/>
"It's fine, Master. I was just leaving anyway." He grinds out, not turning.<br/>
"Skywalker?!" Anakin's enjoyment of the complete shock in the other Jedi's voice and the expression on his face as the former drifts to face Mace is enough to push through the dank feeling settling in his gut.<br/>
"Can I help you with something, Master Windu?" He asks, and smiles just to be an ass.<br/>
"I wasn't aware that you were a mer, Padawan." The elder Jedi responds dryly, raising a singular eyebrow. "Last I checked it wasn't in your file."<br/>
Anakin shifts uncomfortably, shutting his lightsaber off an clipping it to his belt so he can cross his arms without cutting one off.<br/>
"...Master Obi-Wan really didn't put it in." He mutters, mostly to himself. Obi-Wan Kenobi has presented himself as the perfect Jedi to his apprentice, and the only hints Anakin gets that that is a facade are the lengths his Master goes to protect this secret of his.<br/>
"Skywalker?"<br/>
"Mmm. Sorry, master. Uhm, when I came to the temple I wasn't exactly, well, so happy about being a mer. I thought it was bad luck, and was convinced that Obi-Wan would send me back if he found out. That didn't last long, but all the same..." He trails off, wishing himself anywhere else in the galaxy. Mace is smart, and he didn't become a councilor on pure luck. The boy comes from an Outer Rim desert planet, he knows.<br/>
"Hm." He considers this for a moment, and looks at the boy in a new light, seeing for the first time, not a danger to the Jedi Order, but rather a young child, Basic slurred a bit with fear, and broken enough times that he's learned to put the pieces back together himself. "You do know that, even within the Order, stigmatism does exist?"<br/>
"Really?" The kid blurts out, eyes wide.<br/>
"Of course. Nobody's perfect, not even Jedi." Mece replies, with a somewhat self depreciating smile. "Many Jedi are rather biased against anyone who toes the line between Dark and Light."<br/>
"Huh." Anakin tilts his head, filing this away for fact checking later.<br/>
"Padawan, would you like me to teach you how to actually do those katas? I don't know where Kenobi got his information from, but it's close enough to a crime seeing them performed like that." It could be an insult, but Anakin thinks he recognizes a teasing hint to the stone faced master's voice.<br/>
"Would you?" Mace nods inscrutably, but there's a warmth in the way he wraps a tentacle around Anakin's arm and positions it the correct way.<br/>
"You have to keep it at a thirty degree angle, and teist your wrist to the left, like this..."<br/>
                                      ... <br/>
It's funny, how a bit of water can change the course of fate. Of course, Anakin didn't know it would when the first drops of rain fell from the sky. Rex didn't think he'd ever seen his General that terrified, except maybe when he'd seen General Kenobi lying silent and pale in the medbay. But perhaps now wasn't the time to remember that.<br/>
Anakin knew, the second the first drop sank into the skin on his wrist, leaving a glittering blue scale behind it. It didn't take much, of course. He only needed about fifteen grams of water. And the way he could feel the ice and fire spreading through his veins from the wet spots on his head, it was more than fifty percent H2O.<br/>
Panic bloomed, quick and harsh, from somewhere in his gut. It must have shown in his face, because Rex's brow furrowed.<br/>
"General?" He questioned, alarmed. But Anakin couldn't answer, didn't have the time. Time! There was no time. Not enough, not nearly. If only he could get to the ship, but there were clones there too, weren't there? Everywhere else as well. Though surely anywhere was better than here. The bushes! Maybe he could get there, and-<br/>
Trying to sprint for said purple vegetation, he landed, hard and bruising, on his back.<br/>
He cursed. No, no, no!<br/>
"General?!" Rex's voice was more than alarmed now, about ten octaves higher than it would usually be.<br/>
Anakin groaned, and thumped the large tail stretching seven feet and five inches from his waist, scaled in blue and red. A single matching bracer of lamellae protected his left forearm, winding up across his shoulders and down to cut off brutally at the stump of his right arm.<br/>
"Yeah?" He asks, and for a second he's proud that no one short of Obi-Wan, and maybe Ahsoka could have spotted the tremor in his tone.<br/>
"Sir, you seem to have developed a..." At this point the blond trails off to gesture vaguely at Anakin's tail.<br/>
"Ye-es." The Jedi stretches, raising a somewhat confused eyebrow. There is  precedent in other cloning experiments if clones who have been mers, he knows from Obi-Wan's extensive research. They're exponentially less rare than Force sensitives, so he had simply assumed that the troopers knew-"Aren't there any clone mers?" He asks, frowning.<br/>
"Mers, sir?" The captain's working off autopilot right now, shock, Anakin assumes, and something feels wrong about this. With how little privacy the clones have,  they should know of any like Anakin. He'd just assumed there were two or three in the 501st. He sends the impression of his comm, the area they're in (he was <em>trying </em>to learn a maneuver with the men) and a vague sense of urgency to Ahsoka over their bond.<br/>
"Like me." The Jedi says, and a fear wraps his heart in it's cold hands and <em>squeezes. </em>Because he thinks he might know why Rex doesn't know the term, and wishes he'd brought his comm. "You know, three classes, turns into half a sea creature if you splash them with water?" The other shakes his head mutely, and the rest are coming out of their trance now, muttering and shifting.<br/>
"No, sir." The cluster of men is growing around them, when a single Togruta vaults over their heads, landing in a crouch next to Anakin.<br/>
"Hey Skygu- Oh." She stops, eyes going wide with surprise. "Uh, Master?"<br/>
"Yes, Ahsoka. I know I'm currently half fish. Listen, I need you to comm Master Ti. Her frequency should be the last one saved." Silence for a second as she scrolled through the list.<br/>
"Got it!" Depressing the button, she tried to hand it to her master.<br/>
"No, I need you to talk to her." He objected.<br/>
"Why?" It buzzed again in her hand, still ringing.<br/>
"Because she doesn't know." A wide gesture at his scaled and finned appendage accompanied the last statement.<br/>
"Ah. Master Ti, hi!" Ahsoka greeted, turning her attention to the device and standing, to make sure Anakin was out to range.<br/>
"Padawan Tano?" Shaak questioned. "This is Skywalker's comm."<br/>
"Uh, yes, but he's a little... indisposed at the moment. He wants me to tell you-"<br/>
"Is he injured?" Genuine concern and alarm fills her voice, and Anakin can't help it if his heart swells a little. It's always nice to know that someone cares.<br/>
"No, at least, I don't think so. He just wants me to tell you-" Ahsoka tries to continue, looking to her master.<br/>
"If he's not injured than I'd like to talk with him." The elder's voice is suspicious, even as tinny as it is through the long distance.<br/>
"Master Ti-" Ahsoka tries, to no avail.<br/>
"Give me to him please, Tano." Her voice is like steel, and Anakin's shoulders slump, he gestures for the com.<br/>
"Hi Master Ti." He addresses her, rain still pattering softly on his scales and the plastoid armour bodies surrounding him.<br/>
"...Oh." The older Jedi's mouth falls open in surprise, a little unease overcoming her features.<br/>
"So, I should probably tell you, I'm a mer." He tells her sardonically. "Let me speak." He rushes and she goes to say something. "We came out to do some training exercises," No need for her to know that they were coming up with a maneuver, technically not something that's allowed. "And it started raining. None of the clones have any idea what a mer is."<br/>
"None of them are Force sensitive either, Skywalker." She answers.<br/>
"Not that we know of. But mers are about a thousand times more common, and while Force sensitivity is easy to hide if you're under the impression that it's only genetic, Kamino is a very wet planet. And any clones with serious 'defects' are decommissioned." He lets this sit for a second, and then adds the final damning evidence. "There is precedence in at least twelve different cloning processes of mer clones." Shaak Ti makes a sound like like a bantha trod on her chest.<br/>
"That-that is-" Shaak has never so much as stumbled over a word since she was ten years old. Until now. "Rest assured, I will look into this, Knight Skywalker. This theory of yours... Well, I'll contact you with the results of my investigation."<br/>
"Thank you, Master Ti." Even half a galaxy away, she can feel his sincerity. "And, do you think you could, um, not mention this?" He gestures to his tail, flopping it around a bit. She smiles.<br/>
"Of course. May the Force be with you, Skywalker."<br/>
"And with you as well." The Togruta fizzles out. He turns to the identical faces staring at him, to the single orange and white error in the matching code of clones.<br/>
Confusion, the dregs of shock and some of the anger burning hot and low in his own chest mirror back to him.<br/>
"So! Questions?"</p><p>Forty-five standard minutes later, in fresh, dry robes and with a steady pair of legs, Anakin stands in front of a roomful of clones with raised hands.<br/>
"How about I start with the basics and then answer questions?" He tells them, actually thinking something out for once. Sorely missing his eloquent master, he begins when they lower their hands. "Mers are a subspecies found in every known race. The, uh, ability I guess, is partly hereditary, but can also be random, like Force sensitivity. It basically means, than depending on the person when a certain amount of skin gets splashed with or submerged in liquid that is a varying percentage H2O, they shift into half a sea creature. There are three classes: those of us with one appendage, usually scaled, and generally some type of shark or fish tail, mers with more than one limb, like octopi, squid, crustaceans, and those who with half of some type of sea mammal. Classes A and B have gills," He pauses, twisting his head to the side and brushing blond hair out of the way to show the thin lines of gills. "While class C sometimes have blowholes I think? Obi-Wan, uh, General Kenobi only researched type A, and someone I know is type B. Um, any questions?" Hands shoot up, though less than before.<br/>
"Is it catching, sir?" Anakin stifles a laugh<br/>
"No, not at all." The trooper relaxes, and the Jedi ignores the slight pang of hurt he feels.<br/>
"Do you have any food restrictions?" Another asks, and someone answers before he can.<br/>
"Of course not, shabuir!" The clone next to the asker nudges his neighbor, hard. "Everyone knows the General's got an iron stomach."<br/>
"Uh, yeah. No restrictions." Anakin replies, grinning slightly as his words are drowned out by the low muttering around the room.<br/>
"How often do you have to change, sir?" The question comes from Kix, pushing himself off the wall. Anakin stays silent, but even he can't face down the medic.<br/>
"Once a month is best." He replies, not meeting the other's gaze.<br/>
"Anyway, if there aren't any more questions, who wants to hear about how General Kenobi once stayed up for seventy two hours researching mers?"<br/>
All hands shoot down to a chorus of 'Me!'s.<br/>
                                      ...<br/>
"Rex? What are these?" This is what very confused Anakin asks his Captain, Ahsoka by his side muffling giggles. Rex sighs, long suffering.<br/>
"Boots, sir."<br/>
"I can see that. My question is, why are you giving them to me?" Rex sighs again, and Ahsoka can no longer contain her mirth. She doubles over cackling.<br/>
"They're a present, sir. From Torrent Company. The men realized that Jedi shoes aren't waterproof for some odd reason, and after hearing your story with General Kenobi..." The clone trails off, watching Anakin bring a hand to his open mouth.<br/>
"I-thank you. Thank you, Captain. This is the most touching gift I've ever received." Rex grins happily at his general's watery eyes. This definitely makes it worthwhile.<br/>
"I'll relay that to the men, sir?"<br/>
"Yes, please." The Jedi grins back wetly, restraining himself from personally hugging every clone in the 501st.<br/>
                                      ...<br/>
"Master?" Anakin and Ahsoka are eating last meal together at a quieter end of the table for once, and she's speaking up for the first time since they've sat down. "Can I ask you something?"<br/>
"Go ahead, Snips."<br/>
"Barriss has been a bit distant lately. I think, I think maybe she has something going on, and I want to help her, but I don't want to push to much."<br/>
"Ah." This is a bit of a conundrum. Anakin is much not prepared for dealing with the actual educational stuff. <em>What would Rex say?</em> He asks himself. "Do you think it's dangerous?"<br/>
"I... Yeah. I do." She tells him, hanging her head a bit.<br/>
"Then I'd say ask her. Friends are very important," Obi-Wan, and later, Rex have taught him as much. "Even if it ends up damaging your friendship, at least... At least she'll be alive." He says haltingly. The Togruta nods, slight shock tracing her features.<br/>
"Oh. I didn't think of that." She grins at him half-heartedly. "Thanks, Master."<br/>
"Anytime, Snips." He watches her leave, and hopes for the best.<br/>
<em>A few hours later...</em><br/>
"Barriss?" Ahsoka asks the wavering holo of her Mirialan friend. "Do you have some time to talk?"<br/>
"I believe I do. Why, do you need something?" Her tone is polite, but not the warm, casual voice Ahsoka is used to. It invites a tremor into her voice.<br/>
"I... We haven't been talking as much recently. And I just- Barriss, you know I care about you, right? A lot." Ahsoka is almost crying by now, trying to reach her distant friend.<br/>
"I-yeah, I know. And," The other pauses to look around quickly. "I care about you too. Just, some things have been going on, and-"<br/>
"Let me help you, then." Ahsoka says, nearly begs. <em>Let me in. </em>She doesn't say. <em>Tell me what's wrong, let me help you. </em>She doesn't say, either.<br/>
"I-" Barriss wavers, frowning. "Okay." And the Force ripples silently, a warm lavender of contentment. It grows a bit lighter. Not much, yet, but some is anything these days.<br/>
                                     ...<br/>
<em>Notice: part of the next few paragraphs is taken from Revenge of the Sith. All rights to the owner of the Star Wars franchise</em><em>. Um, so Ahsoka is still a Jedi, the bombing never happened, Rex is Anakin's captain, Ahsoka is still his commander, no one is dead, and enjoy.</em><br/>
"You are under arrest, <em>my lord." </em>Mace holds his lightsaber at Palpatine's throat. He turns his head to meet Anakin's eyes as he bursts into the room, ignoring the Chancellor's high pitched disagreements.<br/>
"The oppression of the Sith will never return. You," Mace's hand trembles slightly, and the lit lightsaber in Anakin's grasp dips to slice the floor. "Have lost."<br/>
"No. No, no. You have lost." Lightning bursts, blue and horrible from the Sith Master's hands, and Anakin shudders involuntarily as the identical ghost of energy shot by Dooku seems to hit him.<br/>
"He is the traitor!" Mace shouts over the crackle of the Sith lighting.<br/>
"I have the power to save the one you love!" Palpatine groans at him. "You must choose!" <em>Ones. </em>Anakin almost corrects automatically. And he realizes how many people that has grown to describe. Including... Including Mace.<br/>
"Don't listen to him, Anakin!" Mace begs, shoving back Palpatine's power. "Please." He says, over the Chancellor's weak pleas.<br/>
The Force radiates around Anakin like a cracks in a sheet of glass, and Mace goes to school his expression into nothing, because there's no more he can do. Except, Anakin relies quite a bit on emotions. So he allows them to relax, flood with his fear, his anger, his implorement. The lightning stops.<br/>
"I am going to end this, once and for all." Mace states, breathing heavily. "Will you stop me, Anakin?" He turns his gaze to the Knight.<br/>
Anakin moves forward, a meager few steps. His lightsaber rises a few inches, when water spalshes against his boots and glass shards crush under his soles. A cup of water must have spilled in the earlier fight. An unreadable expression fills the youngest man's features.<br/>
"No." He whispers. Then stronger; "No, I won't." He steps back, and Mace's lightsaber swings down, an avenging shaft of light illuminating his dark countenance. A revenging angel swings the killing blow, and then Mace Windu steps back from the quickly cooling body of Sheev Palpatine.<br/>
"I'm sorry." Is the first thing he says. "That you had to watch that."<br/>
"Don't be." The younger man's eyes smoulder with anger, the Chancellor's lies unraveling one and all too quickly to track.<br/>
"Did anyone come with you?"<br/>
"No. The rest of the council went to prepare, and expect to meet me to meet them here in half an hour." Perhaps, in a different universe, Jedi bodies would be strewn on the floor of this room. Here, however, Mace Windu is slightly more solitary, mayhaps a carry over from his half aquatic form.<br/>
"Good."<br/>
"Anakin?"<br/>
"Master Windu?"<br/>
"Why did you let me?" It's not an accusation, rather, a sincere inquiry.<br/>
"It's... Complicated." The blond steps back, away from his former friend's corpse.<br/>
"I'd imagine so." Mace follows him to the other room, sitting across from the other Jedi.<br/>
"Master Windu, I don't want to be a Jedi Master." He blurts suddenly, after moments of quiet. "I want to resign from the Council. I never really wanted the seat in the first place, I don't need more responsibility. I have a padawan and-" He cuts himself off.<br/>
"I wondered. You'll have quite a bit on your plate in the next month, I suppose, with your children and all." Mace says calmly, placidly, like Anakin hasn't been hiding that relationship for years. He chokes.<br/>
"What?!"<br/>
"I assume Senator Amidala's children <em>are </em>yours, aren't they?" The elder asks, slight concern gracing his features.<br/>
"I-yes-but how-why-how long have you know?" Anakin stumbles over his words, still reeling. Mace raises an eyebrow.<br/>
"Were you trying to be <em>discreet</em>?" He's incredulous, and somehow surprised. "You just showed up to our first training session wearing a ring and assumed I wouldn't know? I'd suggest you have the senator checked out if she genuinely thought kissing you in a room full of senators and council members was secretive."<br/>
"<em>Moving on!" </em>Mace will need to have Anakin take classes in subtlety, but he'll let I go for now. "That was Palpatine's idea, the Council seat, and well, he made his position on mers very clear," Everyone who's ever said Mace was a good Jedi must have been lying, because Jedi aren't supposed to want revenge, but the Korun's deepest wish right now is to go back into the other room and <em>hack the Sith to pieces. </em>After everything Anakin went through, he's been having anti-mer poison poured into his head for years too? "He didn't know I am one, and after the caf incident he knew <em>you </em>were, and I think he wanted to turn me against you."<br/>
Mace growls, both at the deceased man and the Knight in front of him.<br/>
"We don't talk about the caf incident." Involving a cup of very weak caf, eight purple tentacles and the Senate building, formerly mentioned occasion had been all of eight months ago and occupied the headlines until the newly discovered media darling couple of Ahsoka Tano and Barriss Offee had come to light five hours later and remained in the spotlight for a good few months.<br/>
"Heh. Fine, master. That and my boots."<br/>
"Your boots?" Anakin stuck a leg out, showing off the requested objects.<br/>
"A present from Torrent Company. They're waterproof." Anakin smiles, and Mace sees in it exactly how much those men are holding him together.<br/>
"Anakin?"<br/>
"Yeah?"<br/>
"You're a good man."<br/>
                                     ...<br/>
Anakin makes Rex a badge. It says 'Best Gift Giver'. The twins are born into a shifting world, headed for the better. And a pair of boots have saved the galaxy.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. How Ahsoka Tano's Crush Saved The Galaxy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I know I'm about three days late, and I'm so sorry, but happy Pride month to everyone and here's this, it's my baby and I love it.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It wasn't her fault. This is Ahsoka's hill to die on. Then again, it's probably not Barriss's fault that she's so pretty, is it? So she doesn't know <em>who's </em>fault it is but it's most definitely <em>not </em>hers.<br/>
It was tradition amongst the padawans to go out in the city and practice catching themselves with the Force. This has many benefits, such as experience using said power, getting them out of the classroom and doing physical exercise. Plus, when I'd flinging yourself off tall buildings not fun?<br/>
They'd had to accommodate some with the war and all, but on the rare occasions when more than two senior padawans ended up on Corsucant at the same time, they often volunteered to take groups of younglings out for this exact activity.<br/>
A few things were different this time. It was late evening, so only the five older sentients a few years away from their trials were crammed into the tiny section of the city speeder bus. General Grievous was strengthening his efforts on a few different Mid Rim planets, so none of the Masters or Knights has time to supervise five teenagers leaping off skyscrapers.<br/>
And... This is the first time Barriss is here. They've never quite done this together before, and it's been far too long since Ahsoka's seen her in person.<br/>
'<em>Was she always that pretty?' </em>is, by far, the most prominent thought on the young woman's mind. Moreso than self preservation, but we'll get to that later.<br/>
"Which building are we headed to?" Selme Tsir, one of the younger sentients in their small group, asks. Brekku Eptai, self appointed leader of the excursion, answers her. "I think we should start off with either the Naboo Embassy or the Alderrenian one, because their senators probably won't kill us for jumping off the roof. They're low enough to not really be deadly, and we can work our way up to the communications tower if we feel like it." "Sounds good," Ahsoka nudges the Mon Calamari as the buildings whip by ast the speeder bus's transparisteel windows. "And I bet I can flip five times before I hit the ground."<br/>
"Please don't try." Barriss's expression is very alarmed, and it's clear that she's grateful to have a full medical kit resting it the cheap, formplast seat next to her.<br/>
"Master Chethi could do seven." The last member of their group, a Sullustan boasts. Hirs Ak, if she remembers correctly. His master also happens to be related to him, his maternal aunt. Rare, but not completely unheard of.<br/>
"Well, mine could flip nine times, and do one of those fancy twists." She informs him. Really, Skyguy might manage three and fall on his face (she has no confidence in her master), but it's an unspoken rule that you always say your master is the best.<br/>
"Pfft, as if." Selme responds, tossing her scaly head. "I've seen Master Skywalker walk into walls, dent the salle ceiling and trip over air."<br/>
"Hey!" The Togruta protests, but they've arrived at the Naboo Embassy, and there's no time to argue. They're all far too eager to jump off the roof.</p><p>Brekku's briefing is long and boring, but necessary because protocol. Ahsoka would hate it, but all her attention is on Barriss's hands, trying to figure out if they had more diamonds tattoos then a few months ago.<br/>
Finally, it's time for the jump.<br/>
"This is my favorite part." Barriss confesses quietly, with a minute or so before Brekku calls jump.<br/>
"Yeah?" The Togruta next to her asks is the same hushed tone.<br/>
"Mhm. Except for the actual fall, but that should be obvious." The mischievous grin spreading across Barriss's face stuns Ahsoka into nearly tripping over the ledge when the cry of "Go!" echoes from the Mon Calamari through the rest. Luckily, her reflexes kick in and she's spared that painful embarrassment. Not the next, however.<br/>
Barriss's small blissful smile as the fabrics of her skirts and headress whip up behind her grab Ahsoka's attention in the full, and her fall isn't controlled in the slightest.<br/>
It's also why neither she nor Barriss notices the Supreme Chancellor of the Republic leaving the Naboo Embassy.<br/>
Fortunately, Barriss isn't quite as much of a useless lesbian, as Selme phrases it on the way back to the Temple, and so it's a fifty kilo teenage Togruta Palpatine gets dropped on his head instead of a Mirialan as well.<br/>
Sheev had just been visiting his fellow Senator in an attempt to discreetly include her in his plan to take over the galaxy. He'd had a stressful day, and was very much looking forward to a bubble bath with a glass of wine and planning some more ways to make his future apprentice fall to the Dark side.<br/>
Can you really blame the man for shooting Sith lighting everywhere when a Jedi Padawan lands on his head?</p><p>In the chaos following the heart attack of a situation, it's only Ahsoka and Barriss who keep their wits about them.<br/>
"Ahsoka!" The latter calls. "Catch!" One after another, no less than five pairs of Force-suppressing cuffs flies towards her. Running off adrenaline and instinct, she grabs them, dodging white-blue lightning, to wrestle the Chancellor onto the ground and snap all of the restraints around various appendages. By the time she's managed this, half the Red Guard was poking at the five padawans with force pikes and a few in the back had pulled out blasters from the depths of their red robes in favor of trying to get closer to the lightsaber wielding Jedi.<br/>
Padawan Aks mutters an ongoing stream of swearwords a good Temple Jedi should most definitely not know while poking back at the red robed beings with his green bladed weapon in what is most definitely <em>not </em>an actual fighting style. Only difference is, his jabs actually hit stuff.<br/>
Selme fought with her claws more than weapons, gleeful viciousness lighting her eyes as she whirled between her opponents.<br/>
Brekku has pulled out his lightsabers, holding them in the reverse grip favoured by Shien users, and is attacking the enemies in front of him with precsice and disciplined movements.<br/>
Barriss stands in front of Ahsoka, defending her from stray blaster bolts and the occasional guards that manage to make their way through the others.<br/>
As Snips herself? She sits on the Supreme Chancellor's back with a probably sprained ankle, holding the old Sith down with muscles honed by a year and a half on the battlefield.<br/>
Eventually, of course, the fight is over, leaving the Jedi only a worse for the wear, and a good part of the Red Guard comparatively worse, the latter being fairly dead.<br/>
"So." Ahsoka says into the silence. "Do you have any allergies to sedatives, sleemo?" She asks Palpatine.<br/>
"What?"<br/>
"No? Well in that case, Barriss, throw me the Benzodi." She rolls her eyes instead, looking to Hirs, who nods his head.<br/>
"That should be fine. His personal files say Nytinite causes a rather bad reaction, but most other tranquilizers are fine. Oh, also I sliced the traffic cams, stuck them with decent firewalls. The stuff the Republic uses is practically flimsi."<br/>
The Mirialan nods, kneeling to expertly search her medkit and then pulling out a small blowgun and shooting the man with a dart. Ahsoka doesn't even jump, ignoring Brekku's protests of 'Offee! You could have hit Tano!' and then later, as Barriss helps her hobble to the closest speeder bus stop, a sack from some nearby store over Palpatine's head and another over his body and his fancy embroidered outer robes shoved in a shrub  'Tano, I'm fairly sure yoying the man counts as frivolous use of the Force.' because they all know it's how he expresses concern.<br/>
The trip back to the temple is mostly silent, adrenaline wearing off as the teenagers begin to feel the effects of battle. Barriss deals quietly with all of their collective injuries, Selme took a blaster bolt to the shoulder, and Ahsoka sprained her ankle rather badly. Between them they have a motely group of miscellaneous cuts and scrapes, but a few bacta patches fix most of the severe ones.<br/>
Ahsoka stares out the window while Barriss splints her ankle, letting herself enjoy the feel of other girl's soft hands brushing against her leg.<br/>
As she finishes up, the Togruta turns her blue gaze meet Barriss's. She lets a little -okay, maybe more than a little- mischief sneak into her slight grin, and bends her head to press her lips quickly to the bandages.<br/>
"All better." Her voice is perfectly calm, do only Ahsoka can see the tentative affection in her expression. She's the only one who could read Barriss anyway. A fraction of the tension leaves her shoulders as an azure fire of something Barriss doesn't date call love lights itself in the other woman's eyes.<br/>
"Thank you." She whispers.</p><p>"What's in the sack?" A curious citizen asks, coming to stand near the sixtuplet of seats.<br/>
"Official Jedi business, sir. I'm sorry, it's classified." Brekku replies, the picture of a perfect Jedi, no hint of the smirking Mon Calamari who'd been there a moment before. Hirs stares at him in clear admiration, he may be a genius at hacking, but subtlety and masks were never his speciality.<br/>
The person grunts, walking off and the young teens let a tired but comfortable silence fill the air until the speakers chime with their stop.<br/>
They trundle off the vehicle, Ahsoka leviataing the dark bag in the thin layer between the walking level and traffic.<br/>
They get quite a few stares in the way to the confinement cells, and Ahsoka glares eight back. Selme joins in and most people look away rather quickly. Barriss does her part in deflecting the Force probes that come at the sack.</p><p>Yoda is floating in his chair outside one when they arrive, looking through the one-sided glass wall at the recently surrendered Count Dooku.<br/>
He glances up when they're standing a few meters away.<br/>
"Hmm. Something interesting, you have brought me, younglings?" The short Grandmaster asks, ears rising a fraction.<br/>
"Yes, I should think so, Master Yoda." Brekku replies, motioning for Ahsoka to lower the limp bag to the floor. She holds it upright as the Mon Calamari pulls the bag over his head off with perhaps a touch more dramatic flair than strictly necessary. Yoda stands up straighter, glaring at them.<br/>
"For the presence of the Chancellor, a good reason, I hope you have." His voice is cold, edging on angry.<br/>
"Well, I don't know, Master." Ahsoka steps forwards, meeting the glare of the most senior living member of her lineage. "I suppose it's possible that the Chancellor reads credit romance novels in his spare time and that's where he picked up a penchant for blasting people with Sith lightning." The Grandmaster reels.<br/>
"Sith... Lighting?" He asks slowly.<br/>
"Yes." Yoda nods.<br/>
"A cell, we shall put him in, then." The old Jedi says, the weight of years resting in his tone. "Until proven, your claims can be. Come." He bangs his gimmer stick on the edge of his hoverchair, and floats off down the hallway faster than he should be able to go.</p><p>"Ahsoka?" It's her master, because of course it is. She just can't catch a break today, can she? "Would you like to explain to me why word around the Temple is that the group of jumpers who went out today came back with <em>Chancellor Palpatine </em>in their <em>illegal custody</em>?" His voice is low, and the badly suppressed anger spilling off his tongue runs ice cold.<br/>
"Okay, so, Master," She begins, hands drifting slowly towards her lightsabers, prepared to defend herself at moments notice. He, would hurt her, she was sure. Or at least, he wouldn't mean to. "You know how I've got these issues with Palpatine? Like, how I don't trust him, and, well, I don't like him, like, at all?"<br/>
"Yes." His tone is even more dangerous, teetering on the edge of fury.<br/>
"Well this has absolutely nothing to do with that."<br/>
"It doesn't?" Cynicism and disbelief flow through the words as she nods.<br/>
"Not at all. But it <em>does </em>have a bit more to do with the fact that it wasn't illegal custody, because according to the Charter To Constitute The Galactic Republic Article six section two," <em>Thank you the Force for Hirs' obsession with legal tomes, she muttered inside her own head. </em>"'The Jedi Order and the Jedi High Council are charged with the containment and elimination of the Sith from all Republic territories.'" She let it sink for a moment.<br/>
"What do you mean, Sith?" He looked so confused, jumping so quickly from one emotion to the next."The Supreme Chancellor isn't a Sith." Ahsoka winces.<br/>
"Uhm, so about that, he kinda is." She bites her lip, meeting her friend's gaze. "A Sith Master, we think. He's, Skyguy, he's probably Sidious." She watches, watches his shoulders slump, watches his midsection cave in a sharp exhale as he processes her words, watches him break into pieces and knows there's only so much she can do to help.<br/>
But she can do a little bit.<br/>
Ahsoka steps forward, and wraps Anakin up in a crushing hug, shoving the shards back together as hard as she can. She holds him tight for seconds, minutes, what feels like hours. Holds him as he lets himself break, cuts herself on the gashing fragments of her friend as she squeezes him in a death grip.<br/>
"It's alright, Master. Anakin. It's going to be okay." She murmurs in a soft voice, still holding him. He extracts himself slowly.<br/>
"Thank you Ahsoka. Snips." A shadow of his old smile ghosts his face, and she hates it more than heartbroken eyes.<br/>
"Hey, guess what? I finally tracked down a civilian chef from Tatooine and got an entire book of recipes from him. They should have all the ingredients for some of the simpler stuff in the Knight kitchens.<br/>
He looks like he's about to refuse for a minute, and then agrees, much to her relief.<br/>
"What are we making, Snips?" He asks, nudging her on the walk down the hallway.<br/>
"Well, I want to try the bantha steak soup, and the zucca fruit pastries look ridiculously good..." Talking animatedly about cuisine from Anakin's home planet, Ahsoka walks down the hall, master at her side. As long as it takes, they'll put him together again.</p><p>"Who knew that washing dishes was that much work?" The Togruta asks, collapsing into a hard chair at the small table.<br/>
"You weren't the one kneading dough, Snips, so you don't get to talk." Anakin falls into the seat next to her, rubbing his aching arms. Silence reigns for exhausted moments, then he speaks again. "So why don't you give me the bite size version of what happened today." She looks surprised, a little, but agrees with a shrug.<br/>
"Basically, we jumped, I was distracted, didn't see him underneath, and then Force lightning was flying everywhere, my ankle was sprained and we were fighting the Red Guard. I think Hirs has invented a new fighting style involving poking at your enemies with a lightsaber, and it's annoyingly effective, then he sliced the traffic can data and gave them better firewalls after we won so no one could delete the footage, and we came back and handed him over to Master Yoda." Anakin considers the s for a second, then a devious smile spreads across his face.<br/>
"Distracted?" She groans.<br/>
"Yes."<br/>
"What by?"<br/>
"...Barriss."<br/>
"Do tell." This time it's less of a moan and more jumbled death threats.<br/>
"...She's pretty when she's falling off buildings. Also, the tattoos on her face have no right to be that distracting. You know what, it's all her fault." Ahsoka says, sitting up with a purpose at this last statement.<br/>
"Well that's not a very nice thing to say about your friend." Anakin says slowly, only half teasing.<br/>
"You're right, I'll never get her to date me if I blame her for this." The younger agrees, slumping back into her chair. Anakin chokes.<br/>
"Date you? Ahsoka, the Code doesn't really allow that. If this is your way of informing me about your resignation from the Order, it's not funny." She frowns at him.<br/>
"What do you mean? You're married, Skyguy." Having just recovered his ability to breathe, he promptly loses it again.<br/>
"<em>What</em><em>?! </em>That's not-I'm not-how long have you known?!" He manages to cough out.<br/>
"Uh, since like five seconds after becoming your padawan learner? Wait, were you actually trying to <em>hide it</em>, Skyguy?" She's incredulous, on her feet. "Didn't you know that the Code is fine with romantic relationships?" His eyes widen, and she stops for a moment, out of fear he might pass out from lack of oxygen.<br/>
"It... It is?" He asks, eyes painfully wide and pleading.<br/>
"Of course it is! How didn't you know this, every crecheling..." She trails off, murder settling, icy and furious on her features. "I think I might kill my grandmaster." She decides.<br/>
"Why?" He questions, bemused.<br/>
"The Code warns against attachment, and emotions that can lead to the Dark side. Jedi who are more likely to form attachments general put stricter rules on themselves, but it's a <em>choice. </em>He didn't give you one."<br/>
Anakin sits silently, processing.<br/>
"Ahsoka, please don't. He was just trying to help. I do get attached more easily, and he was probably just worried that-"<br/>
"I don't care!" She bursts. "You felt like you had to hide entire aspects of your life from everyone because he didn't give you that choice!" She sighed, suddenly drained, and dropped back into her chair. "I'm...sorry, Master. I just-," She grasped at the air. "I'm imagining if I felt like that, if that was me and I don't... I don't think I could handle it and still be... Who I am." He smiles bitterly.<br/>
"Sometimes I wonder if I am. Me, I mean. Myself. But you know what, Snips? You're always here to remind me when I forget. You and Obi-Wan, and Padme too. And I'll be here for you." She glances warmly at him, and the oven timer pings.<br/>
"Pastry time!" She cheers, rushing over to to oven.<br/>
Yeah, they're gonna be okay.</p><p>Bonus bit: Barriss and Ahsoka's first date<br/>
"Mmm, by the Force, Ahsoka why are these so good?" Sitting between them on a bench in a Corsucanti park, surrounded by colourful leafy plants and otherwise sparsely populated, are two bags of little cakes from a small bakery nearby.<br/>
"I don't know. Jaan'biv is just a genius, I guess." The Togruta replies, taking a sip of her tea. Her date hums in contentment again. "Hey Barriss?"<br/>
"Yes, Ahsoka?" The Mirialan lifts her green visage from the mini muffin that she now likes almost as much as the woman sitting next to her.<br/>
"You're beautiful." She flushes a darker shade of green, and stammers a 'Th-thank you.' Ahsoka notes this and smiles mischievously.<br/>
"And smart. And amazing. And creative, and sweet and all around wonderful." Barriss is a blushing mess, as Ahsoka takes her hand, dropping a little kiss on the back of it and moving closer, switching the bags to her other side.<br/>
And then Ahsoka is cupping her face, and whispering something.<br/>
"Can I kiss you?" She asks, and Barriss nods mutely.<br/>
Ahsoka's lips are soft, and she tastes like muffins and tea and it's absolutely perfect. When they pull apart, Barriss can't control her smile. Not then, not the rest of the day.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. How Obi-Wan's Flirting (read; Rex's Obliviousness) Saved The Galaxy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hey, so i did this. i think maybe there's someone out there reading this, and if there is, thank you so much, you're awesome. i meant for it to be sooner, but a bunch of stuff happened, and anyway, it's done now. hope you enjoy, and have an amazing day!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="">"I disagree. It was entirely Rex's fault." Obi-Wan argues, politely of course, while gesturing with a frizzle fry. Dex's is big, warm and cheery tonight, Jedi and clones filling half the tables in a belated victory party. Ponds volunteered to babysit the twins for the night, apparently delighted at the idea of spending the night with two eight month olds.<br/>"What's entirely my fault?" The aforementioned blond asks, sliding next to his Jedi to wrap an arm around his waist an steal a fry. It's halfway to his mouth when Obi-Wan turns the Disappointed Mom Stare on him. He gingerly replaces it, and receives a chaste kiss in return. "Everything, love." The copper headed man answers, pulling away. <br/>"What?" Rex splutters. "That's no-No!" His partner grins, turning back to Mace, who is squished into a corner next to Cody, his barrier from Anakin and Padme.<br/>"I would like to know exactly how this all went down." Mace drawls, languidly shifting closer to the transparisteel window to give Cody more room.<br/>"Well, let's see..." The younger Jedi starts, a mischievous grin spreading across his features. "I believe it started with-"</p><p>///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////</p><p>It's literally a badly written holodrama. Rex is not at all convinced that there weren't people filming them, but he's a professional, and does whatever duty calls for. <br/><em>"What's the catch?" He'd asked General Windu.</em><br/><em>"Catch?" The other man raised a brow.</em><br/><em>"I don't have the kind of luck to get sent on cushy missions with General Kenobi to oversee negotiations between two pacifist races." He'd expanded.</em><br/>Even if it wants him to pretend to date Cody's general.<br/><em>"Well... They're expecting a pair of newlyweds, but Knight </em><em>Hanja</em><em> will be in the </em><em>bacta</em><em> tank for the next two months. These races hold marriage in a high regard, and have likely already completed preparing for the celebrations..." Rex hadn't groaned audibly, because that wouldn't have been professional. But he was silently thanking every deity in existence for his helmet because it b</em><em>locked</em><em>Windu's</em><em> view of his bright red face and with his vocoder off, also the sound of his unintelligible shrieking.</em><br/>Now, logically, he knows Cody most definitely could have done this job. If he hadn't been sitting in bacta at the Jedi Temple right now. Turns out, taking five blaster shots for General Kenobi is his idea of a good time.<br/><em>"I don't want to ask this of you, Rex." Kenobi's face is screwed up with concern, for Cody, Rex tells himself.</em><br/><em>"You're not asking, sir. I'm offering."</em><br/>Luckily, the Jedi agreed to heal him there, because the Republic would've just decided to replace him.<br/>But Rex can't think about that. It makes him too angry to focus on being his vod's general's husband. <br/>Yeah, he's going to smack Cody at least twelve times when they get back. <br/>Because Rex's heart is a traitorous little thing, and either missed the memo or doesn't care that, A) General Kenobi is his superior, B) Jedi, or at least some of them because this planet got the idea that the delegation was a pair of newlyweds came from somewhere, cannot <em>have </em>actual romantic relationships, among them clearly Kenobi and C) <em>this is a charade. </em>It's decided that the correct response in this situation is to fall hard for Kenobi. <br/>Small gods, the cliche is going to kill him.<br/>"Rex?" He heard someone asking distantly. "Rex?" <br/>He shook his head snapping out of it and noticing the concerned looks Kenobi and the planet's Synod were sharing.<br/>"My apologies." He said, grinning ruefully. "I'm a little tired. I think I might retire for the," He glanced at the chronometer on his bracer, reading halfway into the fourth hour and then out the window, at the dawnlight. "Evening." <br/>"Of course, Captain. We'll be finished soon anyway." One of the short sentients seated around the table replied. He nodded gratefully and got up, lifting his helmet from the table to tuck it under his arm, starting to move across the room. Except. Something tugged lightly on one of his armor straps, after he was far enough away that no one could have reached him. He turned back, to Obi-Wan's raised brows. <br/>"Ah. Sorry, darling." Rex strode back over to his 'husband' to drop a kiss on his lips. Like every time in the past two days he's done this before, his heart stumbles painfully against his rib cage. <br/>Pulling away, he smiles carefully down at Obi-Wan, before striding back out of the room. <br/>Soon enough, too soon for Rex (and for Obi-Wan, thought not that the other knows it) the mission is over. He goes back to being Cody's friend, and the 501st's Captain. And he tucks the little part of his heart with Obi-Wan's name on it away somewhere dark, where it can't grow, because if he doesn't, it will take over everything, and he can't afford that in the middle of a war.</p><p>///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////</p><p>"What's got you moping Obi-Wan?" Anakin asks, pouring the rest of the caf into a mug and plonking himself down into one of the formplast chairs surrounding the small table in his former master's quarters on the Negotiator.<br/>"Oh, nothing." The copper headed man sighs in answering, staring broodily into his cup.<br/>"Tell us, Master." Ahsoka pads silently into the room from the adjacent one and the armchair she'd insisted on sleeping in. "Maybe we can help." <br/>"I suppose it wouldn't hurt-" Obi-Wan starts, before being rather rudely interrupted.<br/>"Hey!" Ahsoka cries indignantly as the last of the caf disappears down Anakin's throat. "You took all the caf!" She points an accusing finger at him, and the room is small enough that one of her offendedly flailing lekku smacks Anakin squarely across the face. <br/>"Ouch!" He yelps.<br/>"You deserve it, Skyguy." She rolls her eyes, turning back to the counter and starting to make another pot. "Anyway, Master Obi-Wan. What is it? You need help getting a date?" Amidst Anakin's flabbergasted choking, Obi-Wan is silent. She turns, incredulous, to look at him. "Got it in one, did I?" He nods, blush coloring his cheeks.<br/>"Master Obi-Wan?!" Anakin wheezes protestingly. "But-the Code-and-"<br/>"The Code doesn't forbid romantic relationships, Anakin." The oldest Jedi replies bemusedly, knocking the wind out of his former padawan for the second time that morning. "Force, is that what you've thought all these years?"<br/>"But what about your wife, Skyguy?" Ahsoka pipes up, perching opposite her master. The only sound coming from Anakin is a whistling as all the air left in his lungs steadily streams out. They wait for him to regain composure.<br/>"You know?" He asks first, turning to his padawan. "Uh, yeah. Everyone knows." Multiple expressions flit across Anakin's face, before it settles on despair.<br/>"How many bets are there?" He questions with more than a hint of distress. <br/>"How may men are there in the GAR?" She answers mockingly. He shakes his head, compartmentalizing that and putting it away to deal with later. Turning to Obi-Wan, he raises his next subject.<br/>"But doesn't the Code forbid emotion?" The elder stares at him disbelievingly, eyes widening. He shakes his head. <br/>"I <em>knew </em>I should have made you do more book work. <em>No, </em>according to the current interpretation, it forbids negative emotions. Some Jedi choose to attempt for no emotion at all, because they function better without any, but your greatest strength has always been your emotion. I'm sorry, I tried to teach you to channel it, not ignore it." Anakin nods in response, eyes still the size of saucers. Silence reigns undisturbed for moments and then Ahsoka speaks up again.<br/>"So, Master Obi-Wan. Who are we seducing?"<br/>"Rex." He replies, and add another two to the tally of times Anakin tried to asphyxiate himself that morning.</p><p>///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////</p><p>After five failed attempts, both the entire 212th and all of the 501st save Rex are in on the planning, mostly because they'd walked in on General Kenobi trying to subtly get the blue painted battalion's captain to date him... <br/>"<em>Captain, I was wondering if you'd like to have dinner with me tonight." <br/>"Uh, sure sir. Are General Skywalker and Commander Tano also going to be there?"                    "No, just the two of us." <br/></em></p><p>
  <em>"Sounds delightful, sir. Looking forward to it." Rex salutes, and stalks politely out of the room. Obi-Wan drops his head into his hands, and groans. Jesse drops from the vent, banging it closed on his way down. <br/></em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Did you know he was that oblivious? I didn't." He remarks, clapping the Jedi on the shoulder in sympathy. Obi-Wan looks up at him despairingly. <br/>"That's the third time this has happened." Jesse whistles, alarmed.<br/></em>
</p><p><em>"Don't worry sir, I'm sure we'll figure something out."</em>                                                                                      Anakin is <em>dedicated </em>to getting his former master with his captain. As are all his men. <br/>"Anakin, my boy! I've been looking for you. Are you free this afternoon?" The Chancellor beams widely, striding over to the young man and shaking his hand in greeting.                                                   "I believe so, sir! Now?" He replies, mood lifting at the idea of spending time with his friend.           "Sir! General Kenobi is going to try Plan Twenty Three! He says it requires your help, sir." The single trooper clad in 501st blue sprints over, saluting.                                                                                        "Really?! He's going through with it? I was so sure he thought it was too flashy." Anakin grins brightly, radiating happiness into the Force. Palpatine just manages not to flinch.                                 "I'm really sorry, Chancellor, but this is important." The boy turns to him, apologetic to an extreme. This is really getting to be an issue, he's somehow learned that, contrary to what Sheev has been influencing him to believe, the Jedi do not  ascribe to emotionlessness.                                 "Oh, no. It's alright Knight Skywalker. We'll reschedule for some other time." He acquiesces gracefully. There's no salvaging this afternoon, he knows. He only lets his smile drop once Anakin is on his way out of the room conspiring through whispers with the clone.                               </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Palpatine wrecks <em>so</em> many vases that evening. With his apprentice slipping from his hands back to the Light, the Separatists beginning to question their own motives for seceding from the Republic and the Senate proceeding uncharacteristically and annoyingly fast, he deserves to.</p><p>///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////</p><p>"Hey Padme?" Anakin is sprawled onto his side on the bed, head cushioned on his elbow.                He has a single night left before his next deployment, and they're together in the bedroom of her apartment, both too tired for more than sleep. She'll have this night sleeping by his side while he's out fighting for their Republic, and it's more than anything she'd let herself hope for.        "Yes, darling?" She replies, carefully draping the heavy outer layer of her gown over a chair and beginning to pull the pins out of her hair.<br/>"Do you have any advice on how to ask someone out on a date?" She turns a flat stare on him, yanking out the last of the clips.<br/> "<em>What</em>-oh, not for me!" He says, getting up and coming to run a hand through her loosed hair as the other deftly undoes the little hidden clasps in the shoulders. He's learned much about Nubian fashion styles in the past year or so since they've been together. "For Obi-Wan." She pulls back a little in astonishment, though not far enough to stop the gentle combing of her hair.             "<em>He</em> needs help asking someone on a date?" She asks, raising a brow.<br/> "Yeah, why do you sound so surprised?" Her husband returns, beginning to pull her locks into a simple braid. She turns over the thought in her head, wondering how to phrase this.                          "Because he's a rather... charismatic person, and I suppose I'm wondering how that in it self hasn't worked." She states decisively, pulling the small packet of makeup remover sheets over from the corner of the dressing table and starting at her hairline. <br/>"Well, some of our original plans were pretty understated, cause, you know, that's Obi-Wan's style. But then, when those didn't work, we moved on to some ideas Snips and I came up with, and Kix has informed me that neither of us have any talent for subtlety, so we figured those would work, but they didn't and I'm kind of out of suggestions," He ties off her braid with a bit of soft grey ribbon. "At least any that Obi-Wan will agree to," He amends, and continues. "And you're super smart and stuff, so..." He trails off, looking at her with The Baby Ewok Eyes Of Doom™  through the mirror. She sighs, wiping the last bit of  makeup off her cheek.<br/>"Is there any more information you can give me?" She questions, somewhat tiredly seceding her evening to her husband's big heart and newfound love of matchmaking.<br/> "Um, what kind?" He organizes everything on the dresser neatly, for her to make use of in the morning as she silently debates between two outfits for the next day. <br/>"Well, the identity of the other person would be a good place to start." She responds somewhat dryly, deciding on one, identical to the other except in it's slightly darker shade of red. "Unless, of course, you can't disclose that."<br/>"Hm? Oh, I don't think so. At least half the GAR knows by now. It's Rex." He replies, gently nudging her Senate headpiece slightly farther to the right. She stifles a rather undignified snort at his expression of concentration, and then another at the mental image of the rather dignified Jedi master whom she counted among her friends using one of Anakin's infamous 'plans' to flirt with her spouse's clone Captain.<br/> "Well. In that case, I might be enticed to come up with a few ideas." She murmurs, tugging the outfit over to rest next to the dressing table, and sighing slightly. Anakin, watching her, notices the slump of her shoulders.<br/> "You, know what, this can wait for later. I think we both need some sleep right now." He declares, and pulls her to the soft bed. As the corner of her mouth lifts in a happy smile, she looks into his eyes and recalls every reason she loves him.                                                                     </p><p>///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////</p><p>Ahsoka is extremely happy when Obi-Wan says it's alright for her to tell Barriss. She knows her friend has a weakness for romance, and this will give her an excuse to be calling the Mirialan on a consistent basis. Oh, not that anyone objects to Jedi having <em>friends</em>. But they don't seem to realize that relationships need more than seeing each other between missions and a few calls every standard month. Any more than two a week, and whispers, glances with meanings like attachment start to fly among the elder masters and Padawans. But, if she's calling for completely unselfish reasons, to help her grandmaster, and just happens to sneak five minutes of conversation in here, surely that would be fine, wouldn't it? And if they engage in deep philosophical discussions occasionally during the time left between the end of their plotting for Master Kenobi and finishing their matching shifts in routine ship maintenance or solitary kata practice, well, all the better. After all, if talking saves them both from dark, spiraling thoughts while doing mundane tasks, then all it means is the Masters will have less 'Why?', 'How? and 'What do you mean?' questions to field. </p><p>
  <em>"I'm not sure, Ahsoka. It just seems somewhat hypocritical to preach neutrality and then take leading roles in a war that affects the entire galaxy." Barriss had wrinkled her nose, focusing on a tricky step of the practice kata she was performing.<br/></em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I get that. And you know what, I agree with you." Ahsoka huffed, wiping her hands on an oil stained cloth and shooing the droid she'd just finished tuning up away, moving on to the next in line. Usually, her master would do this job, but Rex had banned him from it after he'd armed the mouse droids with nineteen different defensive mechanisms they'd accidentally used to cause an intergalactic scandal five deployments ago.<br/></em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You do?" <br/></em>
</p><p>
  <em> "Sure. The way you put it, I definitely do. I think there's one thing you haven't taken into consideration, though. The Jedi should be fully supportive of the Separatist ideals, shouldn't they? I mean, yes, we align ourselves with the Republic, but that doesn't mean we think that everyone needs to be part of it do we? There were other know systems outside of it before the war and we didn't oppose that. Wait, let me finish," She raised a palm to the comm unit sitting on the precariously stacked oil cans next to her, then quickly catching some falling screws from the current droid. "I think, the reason we're fighting now, is because the Separatists are trying to impose their ideas on the rest of the galaxy by defeating the Republic because they see it as distant and dispassionate, even though at the very core, was founded on the concept of giving everyone an equal say. I think that the Order respects that view, up until the point that they try to force it on everyone else. In that case, we're not fighting to bring them back to the Republic, but rather to defend the people of the latter and to fight the Sith, who represent everything we stand against." She had gently closed the main panel on the droid, pushing it off to the side.          "Huh. I suppose I never thought of it that way." Barriss had looked thoughtful, slashing once more with her saber and stepping twice to the right. <br/>"Thank you." <br/></em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Glad I could help. Now, let me tell you about how Master Skywalker walked into a wall twice the other day." Barriss stumbled, gasping slightly.<br/></em>
</p><p>
  <em>"No!"<br/></em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Yes."</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>After that conversation in particular, the Force had hummed happily for days. Ever since, it was a little clearer, a little lighter and the tiniest bit more solid. It brought a smile to the grim countenances of many war-worn Jedi scattered among the stars, to know that somewhere, something had gone right. A little more hopeful.</p><p>So yes, Ahsoka was extremely thankful, both for Rex's ignorance and Skyguy's persistence in going through with every one of his ridiculous plans. It gave her an excuse if she needed one and a distraction for them both from the brutal, raw truth of the war they fought every day, allowing them to process it together, on their own terms.</p><p>///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////</p><p>"And that's why I think this is the best plan I've-Kriffing Sith hells, Master, look out!" Anakin jumps to his feet, knocking his chair backwards as Obi-Wan recognizes the bright hiss of a lightsaber extending. He's on his feet just as fast, weapon called to hand from across the room, turning to find-<br/> -Master Yoda? And - ah, Count Dooku, illuminated by the light of the setting Coruscant Prime, shining through the window. That explained Anakin's reaction.<br/>"Master! Get away from him!" His former padawan exclaims, emotions filling his expression just as fully as they used to when he was younger. It gives Obi-Wan a warm feeling to see him like this again.<br/> "Peace, young Skywalker." Yoda says calmly, waving a hand at them both.<br/>"You know, Master Yoda," Obi-Wan begins conversationally. "I rather agree with him, if less colorfully. May I ask exactly why your chosen company happens to be Count Dooku, and what the purpose of your presence in my quarters is?" He doesn't lower his own saber.<br/>"I have surrendered myself and my troops to the Jedi Order," Dooku answers instead, hands still lifted placatingly. "I was injured in my last altercation, and that gave me some time to reflect on my choices and the reasoning behind them. I've realized that not everything I have done was quite as well thought out as it should be, and, after a close examination of the Confederacy's goals and methods, decided that the best course of action for Serenno does not align with them."<br/>"So what, they hit you hard enough to send you into retirement?" Anakin sneers, disbelieving. "Yes," Deadpans Yoda. "Spend time with his grand-padawans, he would like to." Obi-Wan badly stifles a snort, and Dooku shoots his former master a dirty look.<br/>"Not quite. I-well, I'd be happy to explain on an occasion with a less limited time frame, but I happen to be here because he believes I can help you with a certain problem." Dooku gestures to Yoda, who smiles. Anakin lowers his lightsaber and deactivates it, recognizing Force suppressant cuffs, apparently redesigned as bracelets, encircling the other's wrists. He notes that Yoda's ears are higher than he thinks he's seen them since the beginning of his apprenticeship. The elderly, green Jedi is nearly radiating joy, and Dooku... He feels lighter, in the Force. More of a muddled, muted light grey than dark shadow. Of course, it could be a trick, but the Force whispers quietly to trust him, and it's never led them wrong before.<br/>"And what problem would that happen to be?" Obi-Wan asks, following Anakin in putting his weapon away, and moving from the doorway, allowing the two to enter. They sit, and it's not long before Dooku has them all chatting quietly, if tersely. He's always had a certain gift, and the Force swirls just right in that room.<br/>Nights like this one are infrequent, especially since the beginning of the war, but slowly Yoda and Dooku seem to integrate themselves into what sparse ones are sprinkled through their days, and Ahsoka and Obi-Wan begin to like the old man, Anakin less trusting and often making a point to work on his mechanical arm whenever the count was there. It might have helped somewhat that he'd been the only one to ever successfully convince Jocasta Nu out on a date with him and had many helpful tips for flirting, which both Ahsoka and Obi-Wan took advantage of, the former with much better results.</p><p>///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////</p><p>It wasn't that Obi-Wan didn't appreciate the effort. He really did. Just, it was hard to traditionally celebrate the date of one's birth when one was a Jedi and in the middle of a war, the former being relevant because Jedi do not have possessions, and the latter, because <em>we're in the middle to a war for kriff's sake, Anakin, we don't have time to throw me a birthday party</em>. Of course, Anakin hadn't listened. Reeft and Bant were both there in person, a miracle in and of itself when you counted them among by Yoda, Mace, Shaak, Luminara, Quinlan and Anakin. Garen was making a holographic appearance, having not made it back in time for the occasion. Shaak had claimed not being able to stay for long, but had been whirled into a conversation with Mace and appeared to be enjoying the special confection Anakin had arranged for her and his own padawan. Luminara had been debating the Republic's policies on Sith with Cody last he had seen her, and he had just escaped a conversation with his old childhood friends that had been enjoyable until it had taken a turn into the realm of 'who can tell the most embarrassing story about Obi-Wan' at which point it had become steadily less pleasant. He smiles. One day as a break from the war, that was the only gift they'd given him and he could never ask for anything more. Nearly everyone he's ever loved is in this room, and he can feel the warm almost-breeze in the Force, the one that felt like being wrapped in his Master's robes and always left the taste of Qui-Gon's favorite tea on his tongue. The only one missing was-ah, of course. Anakin never forgot anything. The bright flicker in the Force that was Rex hesitated near the door, so Obi-Wan sweeps over to open it.<br/>"Rex!" He greets happily. "Please, come in!"</p><p>Anakin sits in one of the corners marveling at his own concoction. This was really the best present he could have ever gotten Obi-Wan. And Rex! Perhaps his former master would finally do something obvious enough to get the captain to realize that, yes, Obi-Wan <em>did</em> actually like him back. Ah, young love. Hm, yeah no. He's not going to say that again. Makes him feel too old. His comm beeps; it's a message from Padme, an apology that she can't make it to the party. He sends one back, along the lines of he misses, her, he knows she's doing important work for the galaxy, he loves her and he'll pass on her congratulations to Obi-Wan. He glances around, and moves to sit across the room, near Yoda. Silently following the old Jedi's gaze as it moves from a holographic Aayla laughing with Quinlan, to Ahsoka and Barriss quietly stealing cake from each others plates and engaging in a rather undignified but enjoyable poking battle, to Obi-Wan flirting a touch desperately with an unmindful Rex and resting on a small group of 212th troopers speaking wide eyed and attentive to Bant, Garen and Reeft. One of them had actually pulled out a notepad and was frantically scribbling down what they were saying. Anakin watched as as the short green master's ears rose, fraction by fraction."<br/>"It's nice seeing them like this, isn't in, Master Yoda?" He ventures, picking at the the sweet cake on his plate.<br/> "Hm, yes. Good, it is." He turns to Anakin. "Thank you, I do, Skywalker." The blond grins.<br/> "Anytime, Master."</p><p>///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////</p><p>He should have known. He should have known, and there was no more to it than that. He should have realized that the one time he actually got up the courage to ask Rex on a date, literally everything that could possibly go wrong would do so. Of course the speeder would have engine trouble, of course he'd end up shirtless because both his robes and tunic had caught fire on the descent and of course they would crash in the middle of a company of battle droids.<br/>"You have my sincere apologies, Captain." Obi-Wan shouted over the noise of battle. And that was another thing, he couldn't seem to call Rex by name, not while the other was insistent on calling him 'General'. "I promise I had absolutely no intention for our evening out to be like this." "That's fine, General. I assumed the mission was meant to be something more subtle than this." Rex shouts back, and it takes the Jedi a minute to process his words.<br/>"Mission? What mission?" He asks, slicing two droids in half and stabbing a third in the head.       "You know. The one you asked me to come on with you tonight. I assumed you asked me because we already did that other one on Lhirja'inr at the beginning of the war. Kriff. Kriff kriff kriffity kriff. Rex thought this was a mission. He clearly recalled using the word 'date', in the sentence 'would you like to go on a date with me tomorrow evening?'. Anakin had scripted it, told him he couldn't be any more obvious, that it would definitely work. Yes, he was sure the Force hated his guts. It was too loud to talk, until finally the backup came, troops flooding the field and dealing with the rest. Obi-Wan spotted Rex standing a little to the side, shoulders  slumped with exhaustion, and strode over. But of course, because the universe hated him, he only managed a sentence before Anakin sprinted over shouting about a priority message from the Council. "It wasn't a mission, Rex."</p><p>They didn't see each other again until the beginning of Umbara, during which there was no time to talk. It would have to wait. Unless, of course, as was always the risk, one of them didn't come back...</p><p>///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////</p><p>"Fives and Jesse are slated to be executed." Rex scrubs his face with a shaking hand. He can't think of a way out of this mess. A glance over at Kix, and his confirming nod isn't even enough to restore a piece of hope to him. So Hardcase will survive, unless, of course, Krell finds out that he didn't  actually die, and then they were possibly all dead. He can't think of anything to do but wait and pray.</p><p>"No! No, you're not going to die. Medic!" Rex shouts at Waxer, a tear rolling down the other man's cheek. "Hold on, hold on, vod." The medic scrambles, over, nearly tripping, and something rights him. He runs over, and it's long, excruciating moments until Waxer's stable again, if unconscious. <br/>"He'll live, I hope." The medic tells him. That's all they can do, hope. And maybe, just maybe, fight. Rex stands. Krell will pay.</p><p>"General Krell, you're being relieved of duty." Rex says, voice shaking as he looks at the Besalisk, who turns slowly.<br/>"So it's treason, then." Krell states. <br/>"Surrender, General." Rex pulls out his pistols, the last word has a derisive, hateful tone that doesn't translate through the vocoder. <br/>"You're committing mutiny, then, Commander." The Jedi, or is he even that, asks. <br/>"Explain your actions." The clone demands, moving closer. "Or don't." He fires a single shot, and that starts the fight. The other clones pull each other out of the way, as instructed. Krell attacks. </p><p>Again. </p><p>Again. </p><p>Again. </p><p>He has to keep going. Keep going. </p><p>Stand up again every time. </p><p>Each second he fights is another second one of his brothers live. </p><p>He does it. Every single time. </p><p>He loses track. Everything narrows to the what and the why. Get back up, because he had to protect them. </p><p>Hit after hit. </p><p>Everything hurts. </p><p><em>I</em> <em>can't</em>! He shouts, but not, because he refuses to say it.</p><p><em>You can. You will.</em> Something says back. </p><p>He doesn't fight for help anymore. He can't make himself believe someone is coming. Instead he fights for time. Seconds, minutes, hours for his brothers to live. </p><p>And then Krell gets tired of playing with him. Rex flies across the room, hitting the wall. Krell stalks over, lightsaber raised to slice. </p><p>The doors burst open, a host of people flooding in. And then a single person looms in front of him. </p><p>He can let go now, he knows. Stop fighting. They came, and Rex will die with Obi-Wan's name on his lips.</p><p>///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////</p><p>He wakes up. The first thing that registers is the pain. Except, no, it's not. He hurts, yes, but not as much as he should. The light is blinding at first, but that's gone soon enough.<br/>"I-what?" He asks roughly.<br/> "Rex?!" Someone calls out besides him. Anakin, he recognizes. "You're awake!"<br/>"Am I?" He responds blurrily, trying to sit up. Gentle hands push him back down.<br/>"Don't do that." Anakin tells him. "You aren't completely healed yet." His Jedi's tone is wavering, as though he's about to cry. "Do you know how worried we were, Rex? Why didn't you call for help, or-" It breaks, and tears splash down on his hand, over which Anakin is hovering.                     "I had to." He says simply, grabbing the other's hand and squeezing with as much force as he can muster. And then, of course, Cody bursts in.<br/>"You dumb karking idiot!" He shouts, striding over to Rex's bed, closer to his head than Anakin, and hitting him on the shoulder. "What the hell were you thinking?!" Rex sets his jaw, takes a deep breath.<br/>"In a situation where a smaller number of replaceable persons must, due to there being no other alternative-" He starts, but Cody interrupts him.<br/>"Don't you dare quote regs at me Rex, <em>you know</em>-"<br/> "Sacrifice themselves to preserve the lives of a greater number of persons-"<br/>"Stop it, stop it now! You're not replaceable-"<br/> "They are obligated to do so." Rex finishes, glaring up at his brother. "Tell me you wouldn't do the same in my place. Tell me, Cody, because I know you would in a heartbeat. They are <em>my</em> men, <em>my</em> brothers, and you have <em>no</em> right to tell me what I can and can't do for them." Cody opens his mouth to reply, but closes it when Anakin shouts at him.<br/> "Great, now you've woken Obi-Wan!" Rex's brows furrow, turning his head, and yes, there he is.  "Cody." He says, to exhausted to keep the dangerous note out of his tone. He turns it back. "Why does your general look like he hasn't moved from that spot in two weeks?"<br/> "It's only been five days, and as to why, you're going to have to figure that out yourself." Anakin tells him cheerfully, tugging Cody out of his line of vision. "Oh, and Ahsoka'll probably come sometime soon. Bye!"<br/>"Rex?" Obi-Wan says sleepily from besides him.<br/>"Right here, sir. Don't think I could go anywhere if I wanted to." He replies, and the Jedi snaps to attention.<br/>"You're awake?" Incredulity fills his voice.<br/> "I think so. I'm just as surprised as you are," <em>But why has he been sitting here?</em> Rex's mind is still working to slowly to figure it out. The he remembers  the words. <em>'It wasn't a mission, Rex.'</em> Obi-Wan had asked him on a date. And Rex-<br/>"I'm an idiot." He announces out loud, turning to... Not Obi-Wan, because the other man had silently disappeared. Kriff.<br/> "I can't say I really disagree, Rexter." A familiar, amused voice replies from across the room. He grins back, and moves as much to the side as he can, making space for Ahsoka to come curl up next to him. "How are you?" She asks, in a quieter tone.<br/> "Much better than I expected." He responds honestly. "But I'd like to understand how, because I'm fairly sure I should be dead." Her eyes light up.<br/>"It was a little awesome," She tells him, grinning into his shoulder. "They tried to pull the same thing at the medical center we got to as they did on Cody that one time, but Obi-Wan was absolutely not standing for it, and he got them to treat you until Master Unduli, who'd found out from Master Vos, who had found out from Master Secura-Skyguy told her-and she brought Barriss and five other healers came from the Temple when she commed them. We got here a while after, and Cody told me all about it."<br/> "Sounds like it." He agrees, turning and shifting farther down on the bed to press his forehead against her own. "Do you understand why I did it?" He asks after a short silence.                                   "I think so," She replies. "But I wish... I wish you hadn't had to." He squeezes her arm gently.      "Believe me, ad'ika, so do I."</p><p>They keep him in bed far to long, and Obi-Wan doesn't come to visit even once. Anakin, Ahsoka and/or at least one other clone has constantly been with him since the beginning, but now, with the simple words 'There's something I need to take care of' they've all disappeared. Standing in his blacks outside the doorway of Obi-Wan's quarters on the Negotiator, still docked in the medical center, Rex knocks twice, and waits.<br/> "Come in!" The Jedi's voice calls from inside, and the doors slide open.<br/>"Rex-er, Captain! It's good to see you up again. May I inquire what the purpose of your visit is?" His voice is unfailingly polite, the tone he uses when he's genuinely does not want to deal with a given situation. It doesn't faze Rex.<br/>"I came to apologize." He says, sounding some more confident than he looks. Obi-Wan doesn't comment on the lack of the suffix 'sir', instead putting down his datapad and moving closer. "What for?" He asks. <br/> "For being the most oblivious idiot in the entire GAR." Rex answers, the corner of his mouth quirking up in a little self-depreciating half grin. "Why didn't you just tell me?" It takes a moment, but Obi-Wan's blue eyes-<em>small gods, this man is so beautiful</em>-light up cautiously as he understands. Rex gives the tiniest nod, and a wry grin breaks out on the other's features.<br/> "Anakin tried to convince me, but it's simply not my style." He admits, drawing a little closer.      "I should have guessed," Rex tells him, and crosses the last distance between them, so they're nearly touching. "In that case, permission to make myself your oblivious idiot?"<br/> "Jedi don't generally have things that are theirs." Obi-Wan tells him, expression full of mischief.<br/>"The other way around then?" Rex asks him. "Not that you're-I didn't intend-I mean-"He shuts up at the Jedi's grin, at him taking the final step forward. He brings his arms up around the other's waist, while Obi-Wan's arms arrange themselves around his neck.<br/>"Yes." He whispers, and fits his lips against Rex's.</p><p>///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////</p><p>"Huh." Mace muses, as Rex reaches over to snag a good few of Cody's fries.<br/>"Hey!" Rex just grins, and passes half to his Obi-Wan, receiving a beatific smile in return. <br/>"I don't understand exactly how that makes <em>everything</em> his fault, though." The bald Jedi says, breaking up the brawl before it can begin.<br/>"Oh, well that's because I was thinking about him when I tripped over the loose floorboard in the former Supreme Chancellor's office and found his Sith robes, lightsaber and illegal comm to the Separatist leaders." The copper headed man replies cheerfully, stealing another fry from Cody. "But other than that, he's responsible for the success of the mission to Lhirja'inr, Anakin learning that the Order doesn't actually forbid romantic relationships, and for him not getting ensnared by a Sith lord and-"<br/>"Alright, I think they get it, sweetheart." Rex laughs, before spotting Ahsoka trying to balance a stack of empty trays on her montrals while doing a handstand on Hardcase's shoulders for the worried but also slightly impressed eyes of Barriss. "Get down from there!"He shouts at her, standing on his seat to backflip out and sprint over. Obi-Wan smiles after him. </p><p>///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////</p><p>Of course, that's not the entire story. There are a few other occurrences, small ones, worth mentioning. </p><p>Sheev Paplatine dies alone in a Republic holding cell hours before his trial, and his Force suppressant cuffs clang as he hits the floor, sliding off the double blades of Asaaj Ventress. The sound her lightsabers make is louder as she crumples them with the Force, splintering the crystals. Perhaps the tall Jedi man with the greying hair and the short, dark-haired woman with eyes the exact same shade of blue as Skywalker's take leave of stalking her dreams then, once she's a simple farm aide known simply as Ghen on the little Outer Rim moon. And perhaps they don't, silently hounding her still with sad eyes for the rest of eternity.</p><p>On a happier note, when Obi-Wan shows up in person, miraculously accompanied by nearly the whole Council, Yoda sees the happy look in his eyes,the contented little smile that had crept back over him ever since whenever her wasn't paying attention, and screeches, falling sideways off his chair. Master Depa Biliba shrieks something unintelligible, just barely within the range of human hearing, and jumps up to hug him. Mace gives him an unimpressed glare... And a not-so-gentle nudge in the Force, meaning something along the lines of 'Congratulations, I'm happy for you.', but not quite because Mace Windu has never even thought something nearly that sappy in his entire life. Shaak Ti, inferring the goings-on from over comm on Kamino, smiles and sends him a long, congratulatory recording later, featuring multiple post-op clones asking him to thank whoever gave them the information about the chips. It was Dooku, but he's not about to tell them. </p><p>And, of course, the twins. Anakin Skywalker denies the Jedi Order permission to induct Leia and Luke Amidala, of no official relation (which is mostly to protect Padme from the field day the press are going to have when they discover the identity of her children's father until she's not dealing with the stress of war cleanup). He tells them that they will have their own choice, and when some of the masters try to tell him that there will be no exception for his children like there was for him, he thanks them, silently scoffing. Force damn him if he doesn't make sure his children have every opportunity they want and more besides. And anyway, he's fairly sure that once his kids are old enough to be taught how to control their abilities, they will be some of the most powerful Force-sensitives in the galaxy. </p><p>It takes some time, but they find themselves again after the war, slowly breaking down walls and rebuilding everything lost. It takes time, plenty of it, and a lot of love. Even then things don't go smoothly, but smooth enough to be hopeful. Perhaps, in a different universe, there's a worse outcome, one where even more die, one where the nightmare does not end and it's the bravery of two young Skywalker orphans who save a galaxy almost not worth saving, but not here. Here, in this one, all of them can be happy.</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>except palpatine, but honestly i can live with that. </p><p>to tell the truth, i wasn't gonna kill him, and then i realized i never kill him, and wanted to try it just once, cause, man, i really hate that guy. </p><p>did you guys like umbara?</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. How Feathers Saved The Galaxy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>m'kay, so first off, maul died on naboo, sorry to anyone who likes him, i don't. also, the clones have different wing colors, but the kaminoans dye their feathers black at birth, as explained in the scene with jesse. that's kinda it, enjoy guys.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hey, so can we petition wookiepedia to get the articles actually named after the clones instead of their numbers? cause according to that they don't have names, only numbers and nicknames, and this makes me smad.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Ah! What the kriff, Snips! Put me down!" Anakin, floating about two feet above the beige carpeted floor of Obi-Wan's room, flails wildly, blue wing connecting with a potted plant and sending it careening into the floor. With a swift upwards swipe of her hand, Ahsoka catches it, placing it gently back in it's place. Her shoulders and gilt edged white wings shake with mirth as she watches the floundering Anakin.<br/>"Sorry, Master. No can do. Master Obi-Wan said I need to practice lifting sentient beings and also informed me that I was not, under any circumstances," Here she makes her voice a few octaves lower in a terrible impression of the Jedi Master's voice. "Terrorize initiates, padawans, knights, masters, clones, or anyone other than you or another consenting Jedi my age. Apparently the category of masters also includes the creche masters and anyone looking after initiates, which means I cant go juggle small children."<br/>"You could have asked!" He protests, still miffed, and finally sitting cross legged midair, shaking his wings out behind him. She considers the patch of sunlight a little behind him, and then, with a flick of her wrist, sends him floating backwards into it. The late afternoon rays of Coruscant Prime hit the feathers, sending them into a rainbow of shades, the left everything from indigo to midnight to periwinkle two glowing twilight, and the right crimson, auburn, burgundy, coral and hundreds of others she's got no name for. He grins.<br/>"Pretty cool, huh?" She stretches one of her own the seven feet or so across the room, nudging him to the side a bit with the tip, so that it glittered a million metallic colors. Obi-Wan, walking into the room at this point, and promptly finding himself lifted off his feet by Ahsoka, reacts with a smidge more dignity than his former padawan. He sits down, folding his legs as she pulls him across the room to the light.<br/>"Stretch your wing out." She demands, and then, at his raised brow, adds: "Please." Obi-Wan shrugs his robe off, letting it fall to the floor, and extends one long wing to touch it's tip with those of Anakin and Ahsoka. The sun turns it glossy, drawing dozens of tones from the uniform brown and sending the white accents glittering.<br/>He tastes salt and realizes he's crying.<br/>"What's wrong, Master?" Anakin asks, concerned. They're still floating, and Ahsoka's joined them as he stares at the swirling pattern the shadow makes.<br/>"Nothing, really." He tells them, swiping at the tears. "But Qui-Gon and I used to do this sometimes."<br/>"Oh, Obi-Wan." Suddenly the shadow's gone, and he's pressed between the two younger Jedi, heads resting on his shoulders. They stay like that for a while, disscussing trivial things, incidents in the temple, other Jedi, and the like. Anakin grabs his hand and pushes affection through their bond. His eyes are heavy as he leans against his former padawan and murmurs; "Love you too, Anakin." Before slipping away into a contented slumber. He misses the shock on Anakin's face, the mirth on Ahsoka's as she asks him how he'd ever doubted that Obi-Wan loved him as a brother, as a friend. He misses some of the gashes on Anakin's soul healing at the realization, leaving the light inside protected. He misses the hours the other spends in the library, answering the questions he'd thought he knew the answer to. But now Anakin knows he'll be there when it matters.</p><p>"I don't care! I'm getting those troopers out of here alive!" Rex shouts back into the comm in his bucket, banging a hand to it in order to silence the transmissions squawking through the speakers. He glares out at the battle field around him, shooting another two droids and dodging seven blaster bolts while deciding on the best course of action. "Sgt. Nyto, there's a weak point fifty feet to the left of you. Get your men there, we can turn it into a-" He cuts off as something huge swoops up from behind him soaring above the field. "Is that-" The shape slants it's wings to fall not an arms length away from him, and it's only because his general's pulled this countless times before that he knows to brace against the coming shockwave, clinging to his place unlike the dozens of droids crushed back against one another.<br/>"Hey, Rex." Anakin looks terrible, blood streaming from a cut above his eye, one arm hanging twisted and useless at his side. He's favoring his left leg, eyes sunken and lips dry. When he grins his teeth are bloody and his upper lip splits, red welling up in the crevice. His huge wings stretch out fifteen feet on either side, too many feathers broken or missing. It takes all of Rex's self control not to launch himself at the Jedi and hug him tight enough to kill, then drag him over to Kix and let him suffer a week and a half of bed rest. Anakin isn't just the 501st general, not just their Jedi, he's one of them, he belongs to them just as much as they belong to him. He's their ad'ika, just as much as Ahsoka.<br/>"Let's give the Seppies a taste of their own medicine, general." He says instead. And they fight.<br/>Once the battle is over, Anakin gets pushed, shoved, cajoled and threatened into a bed in the Resolute's medical wing. He tells Ahsoka and a handful of shinies with minor injuries the tale of how he escaped the droids who'd captured him as they sit rapt on the floor. Then, when he finishes, biting his lip, he begins to tell them stories of Tatooine, slave stories, ones about the sand and the sun, the krayt dragons. In the Force, Shmi Skywalker sits on the bed next to her son, reaching out a transparent hand to brush his wings.</p><p>"Slaves on Tatooine aren't allowed to have their wings out while working. Some of them, owned by harsher Masters, are allowed to take off their bindings more rarely, if at all." Anakin whispers, but everything is deadly silent, even the surrounding forest, like the leaves and moss are holding their breath as well, listening to his every word. He leans forward, elbows resting on his knees, eyes consumed by reflected fire and burning just as brightly. "We were allowed to take the ropes off once a month, no more, and only so we didn't sicken or die. I only learned to fly when I was ten, already Obi-Wan's apprentice." There's a few muffled gasps around the circle, clones are given flying classes from what passes as childhood for them, because it gives them the ability to provide some aerial support even without aircraft, a sizable advantage over the Separatists. "I don't think I can explain exactly what flying felt like the first time. It was-I was afraid, because it was ingrained in me that I wasn't allowed to fly, and wonderful, something like finally really understanding that I was free..."<br/>It's a long story to tell, even only being roughly a decade and a half of memories. But it's one his men deserve to know after his reaction to the last mission assignment. He thought he could handle going undercover in a slave market. Now Fives, who'd unfortunately been chosen for the role of pretend slave owner was recovering from a lightsaber wound to the shoulder. They know, though. They listen, they understand, they do not pity him. And he allows himself to love them for that, lets himself reach out and trust.</p><p>"Jesse, get your shebs over to General Skywalker this instant!" Kix storms over, brushing snow off his pauldrons. They're stuck on some insanely cold abandoned Mid Rim planet only designated J-93, the storm turning it cold enough that the Seppie droids had frozen, but so had their transports. The Resolute still in orbit, trying to find a way to get them off-world before they froze to death. Half the troopers, including Jesse, had lost their armor before the clankers had shut down, and most of those were currently huddled under Skywalker's outstretched wings, because he was apparently a walking heating unit.<br/>"N-n-n-no." Jesse argues, shivering. "I d-d-don't n-n-n-need-"<br/>"Shut up." Kix says, and moves to Jesse's right in order to shove him in Anakin's direction. Jesse can't find in in him to protest, instead focusing on the natural teal feathers of Kix's wings, reaching an arm out to brush snow off his silver primaries. The medic's hand grabs his, squeezes once, and lets it fall, continuing to push him.<br/>Jesse's been considering undyeing his own feathers. The Kaminiise colored every vod's wings black, giving the impression that they were just like the original in that way as well. Apparently, though, wing genetics were completely random, and plenty of the clones were using the chemical mix some general had figured out in order to return their wings to whatever color they actually were.<br/>His thoughts cut off, replaced only by warmth, as Kix sits him on one of the blankets they found, next to a shiny named Dreamer, if Jesse recalls correctly.<br/>"Jesse!" Skywalker calls out, sounding absolutely delighted. "Thanks, Kix."<br/>"No problem, general. Make sure none of them slip away, will you?"<br/>"Sure. Hey, Snips are you sure you're okay?" Anakin asks his padawan, sitting some distance away wrapped in his giant Jedi robes.<br/>"Fine, master." She confirms, muffled by her shivering wings, which are buffering her from the slight cutting wind blowing from the cave entrance.<br/>Kix comes back with another vod, and Jesse shifts closer to the center to make more room. He sighs, settling into the warmth and closing his eyes.<br/>Jesse catches Kix's gaze and grins, and the medic kicks him gently in the ankle.</p><p>"Slow down, Anakin! I can't fly this fast!" Ahsoka calls to her master, but the wind steals the words from her mouth. She beats her wings harder, they fly below the traffic on Coruscant, mere feet above civilian heads. The buildings make wind tunnels, and she's so exhausted. They've been flying for an hour now, and he hasn't stopped to explain why. She reaches out to the Force for strength, and hears it whisper to her. Look, it says. She squeezes her eyes shut for a moment, opens them to ghostly blue overlaying the entire world. She stares at her master, at the second pair of wings stretching with his own. They look exactly like Obi-Wan's, but one of them has a cut at the base, like, like someone tried to... Cut it off. But who-the Sith. Ah. She blinks again, returning everything to normal, and flaps harder.</p><p>There's blood on the floor when they arrive. Ahsoka sees it seeping under the door as Anakin breaks the window. There's murder in his expression as he storms across the room, crushing the entrance open. Thick cuffs encircle Obi-Wan's wrists, cutting off his connection to the Force. The robed figure startles, dropping a red soaked knife, and raising his hands, but he doesn't get farther than that before Anakin, wings outstretched like an avenging angel, cuts off his head. He stalks over to Obi-Wan, opening the cuffs with a flick of his hand and then crumpling them up into a useless lump. He lifts his former master with a gentleness at odds with his thunderous expression.<br/>"Anakin?" Obi-Wan slurs, half conscious. He's covered in lacerations, blood leaking out of half of them. The bones in his left wing crunch, despite how carefully the other picked him up, and it parts slightly where it should connect to his back.<br/>"It's okay now, Obi-Wan," Anakin murmurs. "I'm taking you home."<br/>Ahsoka thinks quickly. They can't fly with him, he'd be too heavy even with Anakin's unusually large wingspan. They can't walk either, not without someone alerting the Coruscant Security Force that someone was carrying around a seriously injured being, and that would complicate things. She pulls out her comm, and begs Barriss to answer. She does.<br/>"Barriss, there's no time to explain. You're still on planet, right? Can you get a team of medics to-" She pauses to check the location display. "94826, 31705? Please." Barriss nods briskly, calling Master Vokora Che over.<br/>"What's the emergency?" She asks, once the healers are on their way.<br/>"We've found Master Obi-Wan." Ahsoka replies, and then the comm dies.</p><p>Obi-Wan blinks. The world remains blurry. He tries again. This time, it clears enough for him to see the female Mon Calamari dozing in a chair by his bed. She startles awake as he shifts slightly.<br/>"Obi-Wan?" She asks, turning to him.<br/>"Hello, Bant." He greets her. "I thought you were on Kashyyyk."<br/>"I came back." She grins at him, stretching her sleek wings so that the light shone through them. "You must stop getting yourself kidnapped, Obi."<br/>"I'll do my best." Something flashes through his head, faster than light, and he shoots up. "Bant, Sidious, the Sith lord, he's-"<br/>"The Supreme Chancellor, we know." She finishes for him, waving dismissively. "It's all taken care of. Now lie down before I make you." There's a crash, half a dozen clunks, nine muttered curse words and four apologies from the entrance way.<br/>"Why don't they make bigger doorways?" Anakin complains, shuffling over to Obi-Wan's spot while rubbing the edge of his red wing.<br/>"Cause most people don't have insanely huge wings, Skyguy." Ahsoka snips from behind him.<br/>"Hey, Obi-Wan!" Anakin calls, his entire face lighting up at the sight of his conscious friend. "<br/>"Anakin!" The copper headed Jedi greets, leaning back against his pillow, examining his former padawan as guilt overshadows the joy on the younger's expression. "Are you all right?"<br/>"Maybe I should be asking you that, master." Anakin deflects. Obi-Wan's gaze narrows.<br/>"I'm just fine, thanks to you." He says.<br/>"How much do you remember?" Anakin asks, shifting. Ahsoka's frozen in place, glancing back and forth between them. Bant looks like she wishes someone was recording this. Obi-Wan thinks back, considering.<br/>"Ah. So that's what you meant by it's all take care of." He glances towards the Mon Calamari, who quickly schools her expression from amusement to seriousness, and nods. "Well, I suppose we're even now." He speaks to Anakin, and nearly explodes in laughter at his expression. "We've each killed a Sith now."<br/>"But I didn't-I wasn't-I killed him because he hurt you, not because-" He protests.<br/>"Anakin," Obi-Wan cuts him off. "Do you honestly believe I was thinking rationally when I killed Darth Maul?" Anakin opens his mouth to respond, then shuts it, shuffling his wings.<br/>"...Maybe?" He finally answers. Obi-Wan laughs, but it's a joyless sound.<br/>"I'd just watched him murder my master in cold blood, completely helpless to do anything about it. He was trying to kill me. I most definitely wasn't calm, or at peace with the Force. It's alright, Anakin. We're only people. We make mistakes." Anakin looks up, hopeful, and meets his former master's eyes.<br/>"Thank you." He whispers.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>oof, so i'm working on a jedi padme/senator anakin au, go check it out when i'm done if you want to. i think it's pretty good, if i do say so myself.</p><p>hypo and stitches are my medic oc's i love them both with all my heart.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. How Flower Crowns Saved The Galaxy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>so I got this idea from Crab_Lad 's fic Truth Time, which is a fox/quinlan-centric fic, and they gave me the go ahead to write this. hope you guys enjoy.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"What story should we hear tonight?" Anakin Skywalker asks his children, dropping Luke off on his bed and crossing the half a step void between his berth and Leia's in order to do the same with her. They're nearly too old to both be carried at ten, the room is still the same soft shade of sandy yellow he'd painted it when first setting it aside for them, the matching white cribs replaced by a simple bed frame with sheets in varying tones of purple and a cylindrical repurposed explosive, hollowed out and built to have a storage space underneath it, with bedclothes of blue and green above. <br/>
He sets his daughter down on the latter, watching as she scrambles to hang over the side and pull out a little blanket, fraying at the edges, while he tucks Luke in, just as Ser Pauldrons the tooka, so named for the patches of gray-blue decorating the shoulders of his otherwise white-furred form, pads elegantly into the room, pausing by Leia's bed to launch himself up and land next to her pillow. <br/>
She covers him with the blanket, and lies still as Anakin tucks them both in.<br/>
"The one about the war!" She demands, post a moment of consideration. Padmé, entering the room quietly and sitting besides Luke, raises an eyebrow in her direction. "Please." Leia adds unabashedly. <br/>
"That alright with you, Luke?" He asks his son, who nods enthusiastically. "Well then. First of all the entire thing was Quinlan Vos's fault." Anakin begins, moving to sit on the end of Leia's bed, crossing his legs. <br/>
"Uncle Quin?" Luke asks. <br/>
"Yeah. It started with..."</p><p class="">The bar Quinlan was at was disreputable enough that a good few of his contacts in the Coruscant underworld-and, if he was lucky, some from it's Corellian twin as well-frequented it, but not disreputable enough that his meetings would be interrupted by the Coruscant Security Force. <br/>
Quinlan was making flower crowns. This did not, as some might expect, impinge on his untarnished reputation as a criminal, but, bizarrely enough, he'd found that his associates were rather intimidated by it. <br/>
That might, of course, have something to do with the fact that a large number of the flowers were deadly to various species, but could also be a result of their bright colors when contrasted to the dinghy surroundings.<br/>
His schedule was mostly complete for the night, meetings done, deals sealed, information traded, but something in the Force had nudged him to stay a bit longer, maybe the same thing that pushed his gloved fingers towards coma-blooms instead of sficcas and dalsa flowers instead of pyros. <br/>
And then Jango Fett walked into the building and Quinlan knew his wait had been paid off. <br/>
Quinlan doesn't stare like everyone else; doesn't need to, being Force-sensitive. He keeps his eyes focused on the flowers, weaving them together in an intricate pattern and placing the wreath on the pile's very top. <br/>
Master Che will be happy, she claims his flower crowns have some kind of medical property that helps with Force exhaustion. He doesn't know if he buys it or not, but is more than happy to see the joy in the padawans expressions when they see the bright blooms.</p><p class="">Jango Fett had just barely avoided killing a senator believably enough that the fact that she was still alive wouldn't tarnish his reputation overtly. He was looking forwards to a drink before he had to go back to the gods-awful, rainy planet that is Kamino and the monsters who held his son hostage as insurance that he would do what they said. <br/>
He picked a this particularly grungy hole in the wall by chance, and then got hit by a metaphorical club to the head the moment he walked in. There was someone sitting at the bar, braiding flower crowns here of all places, and that bodily threw him right into memories of Arla sitting on the porch in the evenings before Galdiraan, before Jaster, before everything. She'd finish one and call him over, drop it lightly on his head, and grin down at him, backlit by the setting sun. <br/>
Arla, his sister. They'd killed her, right along with his parents. And then the Jedi had killed his adopted family, and then-<br/>
"How much for one of those?" He found himself saying, mind blank as he searched for how he'd made it over here from the entrance. The Kiffar blinks up at him, then answers. <br/>
"Two credits." Jango drops them on the duracrete, and grabs the top wreath. <br/>
He only lets himself examine it after he's left the establishment soon after, sans alcohol unfortunately. <br/>
Inisa and Tellanadan moonflowers intertwined with lyris and ziminder, bolstered by star-mist and interspersed by coma-blooms and dalsa flowers. <br/>
He smiles behind his helmet. Maybe the trip wasn't a complete waste after all.</p><p class="">"I don't get it." Leia interrupts. "What's that got to do with anything?" She's always been more impatient then her twin, jumping at every opportunity and so unhappy waiting for anything. Like him when he was her age, if Obi-Wan is to be believed. <br/>
"Well, Fett didn't know it, but apparently some types of flowers can make the Kaminoans, the people he worked for a bit," He pauses to consider his choice of words. "Silly. They were already not very nice, because, well, that's later, but the flowers made them act a bit weird."<br/>
Leia slumps back and rolls her eyes, his cue to continue.</p><p class="">When Jango returned to the wet slobberball he didn't even have the time to hand up his armor before they were calling him in for fresh samples at the lab. He'd forgotten about the wreath on his head until he saw it reflected on a wall, but it wasn't worth turning back. He walked into the lab, and resigned himself to waiting an hour more before he'd see Boba. <br/>
Jaem De was a senior member of his race, one of the head scientists leading the chips and orders section of the project. He had full access codes to the orders, not that anybody ever used them, because they'd been programmed easily enough, wrapped in firewalls and it might cause a reaction in the product if they were altered. However, he was standing in the biological section's lab debating something with Luen So when Fett walked in and some odd scent filled the entire room. It suddenly struck him what a great idea it would be to alter the orders. He set off at a brisk pace back to his terminal, logging in. Which ones to change...<br/>
Order 37 seemed unreasonable the way it was. Perhaps the clones should throw their rations at the Chancellor, that sounded like a good idea.<br/>
Order 92 would make much more sense telling them to begin setting fire to every piece of inedible flora in the area.<br/>
And why not change Order 66 from... Killing all the Jedi? Why would they do that? Must be a mistake. Make it something along the lines of collecting every small warm-blooded life form in the vicinity and... Other senients took care small creatures, didn't they? That, then. <br/>
"Luen?" One of the others asks. "What are you doing?" He turns to tell her, and his joint accidentally hits the pad, saving and closing his work. He swivels back, confused, catches a whiff of Fett's new headpiece as he passes through the hallway and the door opens, and promptly forgets.<br/>
"I... Do not know." He answers slowly. "Hm. Odd."</p><p class=""> </p><p class="">"Chips?" Luke asks. "Like Threepio's memory chip?" Anakin freezes, gaze swinging slowly to his wife. He'd forgotten that he'd never mentioned the chips before. She grimaces, then nods. <br/>
"Sort of. But people aren't supposed to have chips, right? We have brains. But the Kaminoans put them in the clones, and the chips could make them do bad thing, even if they didn't want to." Leia frowns deeply.<br/>
"That's not right." She says.<br/>
"No, it isn't." Anakin agrees.<br/>
"Does Uncle Rex have one?" Luke asks. His father hesitates for a moment before answering. <br/>
"Not anymore."</p><p class=""> </p><p class="">The war proceeded as it might have in any other universe. Except, as it turns out, some Besalisks, Pong Krell among their ranks, are deathly allergic to sficca flowers. Just as unfortunately, he happened to chance upon Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi wearing a crown containing some, as it had been a gift from his good friend Knight Vos, in the Temple halls on his way to his quarters the night before Kenobi was to go to the planet Umbara. <br/>
The deaths caused by such an allergy are completely silent, and incredibly painful. Krell didn't recognize the symptoms until he was fully paralyzed and died quietly in his quarters. </p><p class=""> </p><p class="">"That's a bad thing, right?" Luke asks, leaning into Padmé's hand as she strokes his soft blond curls. <br/>
"It's not a good thing that he died, no, but a commlink to Count Dooku, otherwise known as the Sith Lord Darth Tyranus, was found among his personal belongings, and some slicers retrieved deleted recordings of their calls where they talked about different ways to sabotage the Republic's side of the war."<br/>
"<em>That's</em> bad." Leia announces, sitting up and startling Ser Pauldrons.<br/>
"Yes," Anakin agrees, moving to tuck them both in once again. Very bad.</p><p class=""><br/>
<br/>
<em>(run if you're shiny: Cody<br/>
second in koonmand: wolffe<br/>
token straight: bly<br/>
ihavethebestgeneral: colt<br/>
drowned in datawork: fox)</em>
</p><p class=""> </p><p>
  <b>
    <em>CT-7567 is active on the frequency 'what in the name of all sith hells is wrong with the jedi'</em>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p class=""> </p><p class="">
  <b>
    <em>CT-7567 changed their handle to 'coming for your kneecaps'</em>
  </b>
</p><p class="">
  <em>run if you're shiny: what'd ahsoka do now</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>coming for your kneecaps: we have dooku in custody <br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>second in koonmand: WHAT?!<br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>second in koonmand: HOW?!<br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>coming for your kneecaps: our commander stood in front of him in the middle of a battlefield and tore a really big piece of bloody meat into strips with her bare hands and then ate it<br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>coming for your kneecaps: he claims to want to get to know her, as she's apparently his jedi great great grandchild or some osik<br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>coming for your kneecaps: but my money's on him being just as scared of her as the rest of us<br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>token straight: @ihavethebestgeneral</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>token straight: does general ti also do that?</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>ihavethebestgeneral: not that we've ever seen. then again, she doesn't eat with the rest of us, so i don't know. </em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>ihavetebestgeneral: she says she prefers seasoned meat.</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>token straight: huh </em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>second in koonmand: can we get back to the point that DOOKU IS IN CUSTODY?!</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>run if you're shiny: yes, general kenobi's very pleased</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>drowned in datawork: wonder how much datawork this is going to give the chancellor</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>drowned in datawork: by which i mean me, i say while forging his signature for the twelfth time today</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>ponds: fox, it's only 0400.</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>drowned in datawork: i'm aware</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>coming for your kneecaps: any update on your secret boyfriend that we all know about</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>drowned in datawork: he's still not my boyfriend, thanks for checking</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>drowned in datawork: he did give me this nice flower crown though. </em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>drowned in datawork: </em>
  <em>image </em>
  <b>
    <em>attached</em>
  </b><br/>
<em>[</em>
  <em>ID: it's an innocent looking wreath of flowers sitting on a desk standard for the offices of lower officials  in the Senate. It's surrounded by literal mountains of datapads. Upon closer examination, it's less innocent, made up of plants and fungi mostly all poisonous to the standard human.]</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>drowned in datawork: i wonder if  i can get away with giving it to the chancellor</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>run if you're shiny: fox what did you do</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>run if you're shiny: fox</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>run if you're shiny: fox, general kenobi saw the picture and now he's staring at the wall</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>run if you're shiny: he's not responding to anything i'm saying</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>coming for your kneecaps: tell him you're in love with him</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>run if you're shiny: rex no</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>run if you're shiny: he didn't respond to that either</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>coming for your kneecaps: uh oh</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>run if your shiny: wait, he's talking now</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>run if your shiny: he wants to know how you met quinlan vos fox</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>ponds: fox, your secret boyfriend is a jedi?! and you didn't tell us?!</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>drowned in datawork: he's not my secret boyfriend!</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>coming for your kneecaps: he calls you foxy</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>drowned in datawork: how do you know that?</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>drowned in datawork: i mean, he most definitely does not</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>run if you're shiny: he messaged the chat once when he found you passed out from staying awake for 72 hours straight</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>second in koonmand: DOOKU IS IN CUSTODY!</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>ponds: yes, wolffe, we know</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>run if you're shiny; back to more interesting subjects, fox, how do you know vos?</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>'drowned in datawork' is inactive</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>coming for your kneecaps: we'll get it out of him eventually.</em>
</p><p class="">Meanwhile, aboard the Negotiator... <br/>
"Cody?" Obi-Wan asks, putting down his comm, a long distance message still sending to Quinlan.<br/>
"Sir?" <br/>
"If you're up for it, I'd like to discuss the other subject that you brought up." Something mischievous sparks deep in the blue of his eyes.<br/>
"What subject?" Cody asks, looking wary. <br/>
"The one you mentioned in an attempt to startle me out of my shock before." They're standing closer now, close enough that he could kiss Cody.<br/>
So he does.</p><p class=""> </p><p class="">"Ew!" Leia and Anakin chorus as Padmé finishes telling this part of the story. She knows it better than Anakin, as she and Rex often met up while the war was ongoing whenever the 501st were on leave to exchange tips for keeping Anakin alive and gossip. <br/>
"I think it's romantic. Luke stubbornly protests.<br/>
"It is, Luke, they're just immature." She tells them, smiling slightly and lifting Ser Pauldrons up from where he was crouched to spring from hiss bed to Anakin's face, having snuck out from next to Leia. "You know the next bit, Ani." </p><p class=""> </p><p class="">When Anakin Skywalker finds a flower crown and a note on his bunk in the Temple, he smiles. Several of the troopers have been walking around with accessories like this one, and when he'd inquired they'd readily told him that apparently the Coruscant Guard Commander was now officially dating Jedi Knight Quinlan Vos, a fact that the latter was extraordinarily happy about. <br/>
Hence, half the GAR had freshly made flower crowns. <br/>
He looks up the flower meaning on the holonet, having a feeling that there's something behind them, and nearly has a heart attack when the first one is often given as congratulations on producing offspring, but had the presence of mind to search the rest.<br/>
Secretiveness, respect for another's decisions, support.<br/>
He gathers the message to be that Vos knows but won't tell, and sent this as congratulations. </p><p class="">They're still on leave the next day, surprisingly.<br/>
The Council offers him a seat, with no added title, and he nearly blows up at them. That's not fair! They can't do that and not make him a master! Except... Except he doesn't want to be a master. He's going to resign, be a father to his children once the war is over. He turns, panicked, to Obi-Wan, whispering the question; can he turn it down?<br/>
With raised brows, Obi-Wan nods.<br/>
"Masters, with all due respect, I don't think I'm the best suited for this position. I've got quite a lot on my plate right now, and while I can see your reasons for-" He cuts off to remind himself to breathe, remember that Valorum was probably corrupt, and that's likely why they suspect the current Chancellor. Use your words, Anakin. "For possibly being concerned as to Supreme Chancellor Palpatine's moral intactness, as his friend, I can't honestly say I agree with them. If it's all right with you Masters, I'd prefer to turn down your offer." Shocked faces mirror around the room.<br/>
"...If that's how you feel, Knight Skywalker, then I commend you for your truthfulness. Thank you, you may go." Mace tells him slowly, and Anakin turns to walk out, feeling so much lighter.</p><p class=""> </p><p class="">
  <em>(golden boy: Cody [pun intended]<br/>
if you throw me one more time: Rex<br/>
guy with an eye: Wolffe)</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>
    <b>CC-1010 is active on the frequency 'when will this kriffing war end'</b>
  </em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>
    <b>CC-1010 has changed their handle to 'help i just committed treason'</b>
  </em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>help i just committed treason: kriff kriff kriffity kriff kriff</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>golden boy: fox what have you done</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>help i just committed treason: poisoned the chancellor</em>
  <em><br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>help i just committed treason: he's dead</em>
  <em><br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>if you throw me one more time: oh, just the chancellor?</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>if you throw me one more time: that's fine, then</em>
  <em><br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>if you throw me one more time: he's a sith lord, general skywalker told me</em>
  <em><br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>if you throw me one more time: yeah</em>
  <em><br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>if you throw me one more time: you didn't kill him, general windu did</em>
  <em><br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>if you throw me one more time: with his purple stabby glowstick</em>
  <em><br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>golden boy: what</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>help i just committed treason: but he touched the deathstem mushrooms in the flower crown on my desk</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>help i just committed treason: won't they find that in the autopsy?</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>if you throw me one more time: his corpse exploded, so i don't think so</em>
  <em><br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>golden boy: the supreme chancellor is dead? </em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>golden boy: does this mean i can stop the rest of the GAR from adopting literally every tiny animal on whatever planet they happen to be on?</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>ponds: yeah, why are we doing that?</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>guy with an eye: i don't get it either</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>guy with an eye: general koon's enthusiastically joined us</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>golden boy: well, i got a call from him while he was wearing these weird black robes, and he said to execute order 66</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>golden boy: that's to adopt all the small life forms</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>golden boy: i forwarded it to the rest of the GAR commanders like i was supposed to</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>golden boy: and now we have a lot of pets</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>if you throw me one more time: i didn't get it</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>if you throw me one more time: oh wait, i did</em>
  <em><br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>if you throw me one more time: do human babies count?</em>
  <em><br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>if you throw me one more time: my general has two now </em>
  <em><br/>
</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>golden boy: i don't know, but the 41st decided that includes general yoda, and now he's very annoyed at them</em>
</p><p class="">
  <em>help i just committed treason: what the kriff is happening</em>
</p><p class="">Eventually, of course, the Jedi figured out how to stop the clones from adopting every small being on sight, and the war kind of, just, fell apart without Sidious to guide it. </p><p class=""> </p><p class="">"The end!" Anakin announces, standing and stretching.<br/>
"Now the one about Aunt 'Soka and Aunt Barriss!" Luke pleads, turning his puppy eyes at his father, asking about the events that the the aforementioned couple to resign from the Jedi Order.<br/>
"You know the rules," Padme chides, tucking a wayward strand of hair behind his ear. "One story per night."<br/>
"Aw!" The twins both complain. "Fine."<br/>
"Sweet dreams you, little monsters." Anakin grins, dropping a quick kiss on each of their heads, and trailing out after Padme, who'd done the same moments earlier.<br/>
The light of the Tasia, Naboo's ice moon, reflects through the window, illuminating the peaceful, sleeping expressions of the two young children growing up safe and loved.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>flowers make the kaminoans high because i say so. </p><p>barriss is allergic to star-mist, and it knocked her out, and then luminara found her plans to bomb the hangar and everyone sat down and had a long, adult conversation, and barriss and ahsoka left the jedi order together, and now work for a civilian search and rescue thing.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. How Snip's Non-Existent Knowledge Of Togruti Saved The Galaxy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>so this started with the first scene, and then my brain went; barrissoka!<br/>and i was like, no, we did an entire chapter dedicated to that already. i ship them, but this is supposed to be crack, not just romance.<br/>and then my friend sent me the thing obi says, and i couldn't resist. hope you guys enjoy.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ahsoka was fairly sure of exactly four things right now.<br/>One, Barriss was staring at her, sporting an abnormally large grin as she waited for Ahsoka's response to the words she'd just spoken in,<br/>Two, what Ahsoka was relatively certain, based on a the few childhood memories she retained and Master Ti's stories of Shili, was Togruti, as much as any near-human species could speak it.<br/>Three, Ahsoka most definitely did not speak Togruti.<br/>And four, Barriss was expecting her to reply. Probably in the same language.<br/>"Erm," She muttered, scuffing her bare foot behind her and staring at the floor rather than meeting her friend's gaze. "I'm... Really sorry Barriss, I don't speak Togruti." The Mirialan looks taken aback. <br/>"Oh. Well. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have just assumed that because-"<br/>"No!" Ahsoka interrupts, recognizing the way the other girl would sometimes make a mistake and then draw in on herself, wanting to stop her. "It's a perfectly reasonable thought! And I probably would have, but with the war and all, well, it just seemed to make more sense to take languages people I talk to everyday know for the mandatory Supplementary Languages section of my learning modules." Barriss hums thoughtfully, then nods.<br/>"That is much more logical." She still looks slightly abashed.<br/>"So I'm taking Bocce and Huttese, cause Skyguy knows them," Ahsoka explains a few moments later, as they amble through the hangar into the Jedi Temple proper, carrying their respective armor and kits for depositing in quarters, then headed to the refectory. "And binary, because I figure why not, and it seems useful, and then Mando'a, which doubles as my Cultural Studies project; Rexter says their dialect is different so it counts, but similar enough that minor discrepancies won't drop my scores too much. It's mostly in the battlesigns, and before you get all huffy about skipping classes, Master Obi-Wan said it was fine since it gives me more time to practice the stuff that'll actually keep me alive. And I'm learning something, unlike my own master, who still communicates through grunts and hand gestures with the locals on every planet we've ever been deployed to."<br/>"It would be rather hypocritical of me to complain as I do the same." Barriss says, the doors to her shared quarters with Master Luminara Unduli hissing open as they stop first in the Masters wing on the way to the Knight's dorms. Ignoring Ahsoka's dropped jaw, she takes half the Togruta's load and asks: "Is it true that Master Kenobi knows how to say 'I apologize for my padawan' in twenty seven different languages?"<br/>Overcoming her shock, Ahsoka grins mirthfully.<br/>"Thirty two." She corrects, shifting the breastplate of her armor so it doesn't pinch her lek. "He's teaching me, apparently he also knows 'I apologize for my master, he's somewhat of an idiot' from his days with Master Jinn, who'd do the same thing."<br/>"No!" Barriss gasps.<br/>"Yes!" The other replies cheerfully. "He's really very funny, and just as reckless as Anakin. He likes to pretend he's not, but it's true." <br/>"Do you want me-Ahsoka?" Barriss asks. "What are you doing?" <br/>Head turned sideways, the other girl is painstakingly using one of her montrals to punch in the door code, and clearly suffering if the repeated 'Ow! Ow, ow, ow!' and hopping up and down in anything to go by.<br/>"My lekku aren't long enough to reach the pad." She replies, like it should be obvious.<br/>"Yes, but you could have just told me the code." Barriss points out as the door opens. <br/>"Oh." She has the grace to look embarrassed, taking the second half of her load from her friend and dumping it all unceremoniously on her berth. "Well it's done now. What did you want to ask?"<br/>"Would you like me to teach you Togruti? I've already confirmed it as one of my courses." Ahsoka beams.<br/>"Would you? Oh, that'd be great!"<br/>"Well you already seem to have adopted one of their customs." Barriss says, looking meaningfully at her bare feet. Ahsoka flushed a darker shade of  orange.<br/>"I just never liked wearing shoes. Ever since I came to the temple. Couldn't tell you why." They walk into the buzzing refectory, moving to wait in line for food. Sitting together at a mostly empty long table, they sink together to a deeper level of the Force then they usually stay outside of leave, one where it's possible to feel the barest brush of other minds against one's own. They'd grown up immersed such as this, and it felt more like coming home than setting foot in the Temple had. Spending most of their time cut off from all but a sliver of the ancient web of energy was practical so they didn't experience every injury and death, or the unshielded thoughts of their men, but that didn't mean it was <em>fun.</em>Ahsoka reaches a hand up to the spot they told her the first incision would have been made, feeling as though there should be a scar. She has plenty, pale silvery lines, long and short, thick and thin. She hadn't wanted them treated by bacta, had wanted them to leave a map of her victories and losses, but most of all, her survival. Many of her brothers chose to do the same, and for the most part, the medics let them. She wonders if she's happy there won't be one. </p><p>Kix wouldn't authorize the surgery to remove the chip for her. They'd told her it was too dangerous at first, especially with her montrals as an added risk. She couldn't even understand the language it was in. And there lay the point she'd made.<br/>She <em>wanted</em> to keep learning Togruti. It was the language of her ancestors, in the same way the Jedi Code was. Everything those who came before her said, and everything they stood for.<br/>Ahsoka reaches the other hand to touch the second cut. Not quite a scar, but a tiny little ravine, zigzagging so as not to affect her passive echolocation. She smiles.<br/>She's going to make Kix <em>so</em> many muja muffins.</p><p>She didn't remember the first surgery, the one that had put in the chip. She'd protested to the Council that she had never been on Kamino, and then realized that wasn't quite true. There was one, unauthorized trip, because they were close to the system on the way back to Coruscant, and Master Ti had wanted her to deliver a message to the Council, one hadn't wanted to even hint at to them through comms. <br/>Master Che had said the surgery could be made to take only ten minutes, and the patient would only have to be asleep for an hour before they could be woken. She'd slept in the berth under Rex, but with nytnite they could have knocked him out as well. </p><p>It was a week later when the Sith had decided to test the chips. Anakin had been off on a side mission, and it had been five months since the last leave she'd seen Barriss, when the other girl had offered to teach her Togruti. It was slow going; the language might have been heavily influenced by Basic, but it was difficult all the same, because Barriss had no lekku, so Ahsoka had to learn the subtle movements from modules and holonet recordings. <br/>As it turned out, this was a good thing. <br/>Sidious being the Most Extra Karking Bastard in the galaxy, had clearly misinformed himself that she already knew the language, believing she'd learned it in her childhood, and had therefore decided that a nice, cruel touch would be to have her receive the instructions to order her men to kill her in her childhood language.<br/>Kriff that guy. </p><p>They were in the middle of a raging battle, blaster bolts flying, lightsabers slashing, and Skyguy wasn't even here to help. Then, of course, her comm rang emergency. Slipping from double bladed combat to single with the practiced ease of a hundred hours training this exact move, she clips her shoto to her belt and pulling off the communication unit, she was forced to rely solely on muscle memory and reflex for a few moments while her brain reformed from the liquid goo it had turned into at Sheev Palpatine's blue face popping up in the middle of the battle. Dressed in Sith robes. Kark. Then she could hear the trills and long vowels of the language she was learning with her friend playing in the background. Something crackled inside her head, pulling up memories of a hazy figure talking in Togruti. <br/>Ahsoka panicked. She nodded to Palpatine, the hung up the comm and stopped fighting momentarily to crush it underfoot, nearly taking a shot to the head in the process.</p><p>It hadn't worked, because Ahsoka hadn't learned a lot of the language yet.<br/>Anakin had told her afterward, examining the info on the chip, that he'd most likely tried to have her go through with the fourth command, which for her, was to tell her men to implement Orders 66 and 147 in quick succession, respectively to turn on the Jedi and to eat your own blaster. She'd wanted to murder the Sith, right there and then, more for trying to kill her men than anything else. Her master was a little still in shock though, at the discovery that one of his closest friends was also his enemy and running the war that was killing everyone. </p><p>"Hey, Skyguy!" Ahsoka shouts, the only warning Anakin gets before she crashes into him at full speed. "Look, I got ninety eight percent on my final exam!" She's laughing, big blue eyes bright with joy. He grins down at her-not that far anymore-and squeezes her tight.<br/>"That's amazing, Snips! I'm so proud of you! That's your last one, right?" She nods enthusiastically. "That makes your grade average..." <br/>"Ninety three!" She fills in, beaming. "And I got to be there when Rexter yelled Master Fekril for trying to fail me over my paper." Anakin raises an eyebrow. "Well, it was yelling for him. But zhe had no idea and it was so funny! I think Jesse hacked his forward cams and got a recording of it."<br/>"I'll have to see if he can lend it to me then." He grins. "And I most definitely didn't overhear any plans to take you to 79's to celebrate tonight. I don't know anything about the possibility of Gree bringing Barriss along too, and neither does Master Unduli, because if we did, we'd have to stop it." Ahsoka stills, then bounces up, accidentally butting Anakin's chin with the top of a montral, and shrieking happily. "All right, calm down. Tell me about your exam." They set off down the corridor to their quarters, Anakin's arm slung around her shoulders in a way that wouldn't disturb the vibration of her montrals as they vibrated in time with the trills of her language. </p><p>"...Okay, but you said there were twelve individual oral sections, right? What was the last one?"<br/>Anakin snags her robe on the way from the hooks where his hangs, passing it to her as she starts to shiver and striding over to mess with the room's temperature controls. They've been broken for days now. <br/>"Oh!" She brightens. "It was so cool. They had us translate the Jedi Code as accurately as possible into Togruti. We did the original version, not Odan-Urr's refined one because there are at least eighteen different ways to say 'yet' in Togruta, which is fine by me, because that's more in line with my personal beliefs, but-"<br/>"Wait, the original version? Who's Odan-Urr?" She freezes solid at Anakin's question.<br/>"What?" She asks quietly. He's silent, head tilted confusedly, looking like an innocent baby eopie. "Did-didn't Master Kenobi ever teach you the Code?"<br/>"Of course he did! There is no emotion, there is peace.<br/>There is no ignorance, there is knowledge.<br/>There-" He starts to recite.<br/>"No, that's only one interpretation." She says, praying, begging that he knows, that they've misunderstood each other and he doesn't actually think that the most severe elucidation of the Jedi Code is the <em>only</em> one. Her pleas go unanswered.<br/>"...There's more than one?" She lunges for her comm, clicking 'Master Obi-Wan'. No one picks up. Either he's sleeping, lost it with his robes again, or still on a mission. <br/>"Kark a Sith." She swears, accompanied by a string of other oaths nearly vile enough to make anyone's ears bleed.<br/>"Whoa, watch you language Snips." Anakin responds automatically.<br/>"The situation warrants it." She replies cuttingly, and scrubs a hand across her face, hand drifting towards her lightsaber. "He didn't ever tell you that there was more than one kriffing version of the Jedi Code. The original version is:<br/><em>Emotion, yet peace.<br/></em><em>Ignorance, yet knowledge.<br/></em><em>Passion, yet serenity.<br/></em><em>Chaos, yet harmony.<br/></em><em>Death, yet the Force." </em>Silence resounds around the small room once she finishes.<br/>"But-that's-what's the other one then?" He's utterly befuddled, running a hand through his hair and then gripping the back of his neck with it. <br/>"There are a few, but the one you mean is based on the meditations of a Jedi named Odan-Urr during the Early Manderon Period. Most learn about the Code and it's history as Initiates, but you became a padawan immediately."<br/>"Oh." It's dawning now, exactly how much he's missed. He considers her words for another few moments. "Then why-why did you think-"<br/>"You were teaching me that interpretation? I don't know. I guess I thought maybe it was a lineage thing? Like, you have to instruct me in that, but I can choose my own philosophy once I'm a Knight?"<br/>"I-promise me you won't yell at Obi-Wan?" He asks, switching tracks to something he can focus on while processing. <br/>"Can't do that, sorry Skyguy. See ya later, I need to go find Caleb." She's shrugged off the robe, and chucks it at his head through the closing doors she stands outside of, sprinting off down the corridor and leaving him to his epiphanies. </p><p>"Padawan Tano!" An Iktotchi Jedi, marked as a padawan by the simple circlets decorating their horns, calls over from where they're shelving huge, old tomes of actual flimsi. "Here to return those holomap chips of Besdia?"<br/>"Sorry Kellir! Next time, I promise. I was actually wondering if you know where they keep the philosophy learning modules for initiates." They've come closer to help her, and now stride off in the direction of a large stack of crates stacked by the wall. "Standard age eight and equivalents." She adds helpfully.<br/>"Ah, creche masters making you run errands? How many do you need, about thirty?" They ask, floating a few boxes off the top and to the ground.<br/>"Actually, just one." She says, and smiles sweetly when Kellir stares. "Please?"<br/>Okay." They reply, somewhat suspicious. "Out of pure curiosity-and desire not to have to replace ancient, priceless books, again-can you tell me why?" Ahsoka hesitates.<br/>"I <em>would</em>, but it's a bit private, and the person it's for might be embarrassed if it got out that-well, not that I'm accusing you, but you know how people are. Ears everywhere, often enough no regard for others feelings, particularly if that <em>other</em> isn't very popular." She explains. The Iktotchi draws back a little, smiling at her.<br/>"Ah, I think I understand. Here you are, and get me those chips by next Zhellsday please, or I won't be able to shield you from the rage of Master Nu." They tell her kindly, holding out the module. <br/>"Thank you, I will." She waves, turning to leave, grinning sweetly and contemplating how many different ways she could murder her grandmaster.</p><p>"You're certainly in a mood tonight, Commander." Hardcase comments from where he's seated across the booth from her. With the war over, the 501st had been on cleanup for the past eight months, and this vacation was a welcome one. The estimate was only another thirteen to fifteen tens before the Senator Amidala bullied the Republic into passing the bill to officially disband the GAR. "I would have thought you'd be happier, what with finishing your tests and all."<br/>"I would be, but... Well, stuff happened." She answers, and Rex sits up straighter.<br/>"What kind of stuff?" He asks, pseudo-casually.<br/>"I can't tell you until we're off planet again, because if I did you'd all be arrested for treason. Killing a superior officer gets you a cell." She says, playing along with the 'normal' charade.<br/>"Could you tell us what superior officer's suspicious death would cause that?" Jesse questions.<br/>"Nope."<br/>"Well, I had to try."<br/>"There's not much you can do about it until you have the full story." Barriss tells her, covering the leather of her glove with an olive hand. <br/>"Yeah, I know." She sighs, and returns the squawked protests of 'Commander Offee gets to know?!' with a skeptical glare. <br/>"Hey, did I ever tell you about that one mission to bodyguard an ex-senator turned babysitter I had with Wolffe?" One of the clones asks. It's Ponds, whom Ahsoka was introduced to today by Rex. He'd brought Caleb because Commander Grey had been busy. <br/>"No." Cody says, from where he's seated next to Rex. </p><p>"And then he walks out of the room, <em>completely covered</em> in shimmerdust, turns to me and says; "Not a <em>word</em>." The entire table is cracking up, Hardcase is rolling on the floor.<br/>"Does Plo know?" Ahsoka asks, wiping tears of mirth away before they can fall on the cracked synthleather seats. <br/>"General Koon? I doubt it. He hears the rumors, but Wolffe is very adept at controlling which ones." <br/>"Can I tell him?" She asks, leaning forward. "He'd absolutely love it."<br/>"Sure, why not?"<br/>She spends the night laughing with her friends, worries and war forgotten. At least for now.</p><p>"Mmm... Good morning, padawan." Obi-Wan yawns, stretching as he enters the kitchen He'd apparently slept on their couch the previous night. She ignores him, attending instead to the griddle. Anakin's a good cook, but she's generally not in the mood for something spicy early in the morning, so she makes a habit of waking up before him to make first meal.  He notices, and asks: "Ahsoka? Is everything all right?" She studiously focuses on flipping the hotcakes just right. Aw, kriff, one of them had landed messily. "Ahsoka?"<br/>"Can I help you with something, Master Kenobi?" She finally asks, colder than a snowstorm on Hoth. He looks rather taken aback at her tone. <br/>"I-no." He falls, thankfully, silent for a few minutes, before making another venture at conversation. "Do you like cloudberries in  your hotcakes?"<br/>"I wasn't aware I was allowed to have opinions, Master!" She exploded, whipping around. <br/>"I-"<br/>"Or is it just Anakin who isn't? Does it not apply to me?" She's got an entire tirade on the tip of her tongue, but pauses at his utterly mystified expression.<br/>"What?" He asks.<br/>"I-do you really have no idea what I'm talking about?" She responds slowly.<br/>"None at all, whatsoever." He looks so bewildered, it'd almost be funny.<br/>"I recently discovered that no one ever taught Skyguy basically anything about the Jedi Code. And because he hates Philosophy, which is mandatory, he never learned anything about the original version." Obi-Wan pales further with her every word, and staggers slightly to grip the back of a chair and lean on it heavily. <br/>"I never knew." He murmurs. "I thought-he knew Odan-Urr's interpretation, so I assumed Qui-Gon had explained the Code to him. He had to learn the Crystal Code, but I assumed-" He broke off staring st something she couldn't see.<br/>"Morning, Snips, Obi!" Anakin greets striding into the room. "What's got the two of you so blue?" <br/>"I'm sorry, Anakin." Obi-Wan says earnestly, turning to face the taller man. "I didn't know; I thought Qui-Gon had taught you more about the Jedi Code than he apparently did, but that's no excuse. I was responsible for your education, and I failed-"<br/>"Ahsoka!" Anakin snaps, interrupting his former master. "Why would you-"<br/>"I couldn't just not say anything, master." She replies calmly, sprinkling bits of frozen meliroon on several of the cakes, poking them it until they were covered before flipping the entire batch. <br/>"Well-but-did you have to-I mean-" Anakin's spluttering, and would probably have continued to do so, except Ahsoka picked up one of the hotcakes and stuffed it in his mouth to shut him up. His yell is muffled, and then it turns into a hum of consideration. He swallows. "Hm. These're good."<br/>"Thank you. Now, accept Master Obi-Wan's apology, reassure him that you don't blame him, and we can have food."<br/>"...You really don't?" Said Jedi Master asks, sounding like nothing more than an unhappy little initiate.<br/>"Of course not, Obi-Wan. What's done is done; you can't change the past. In fact, I'll even promise to have philosophical debates with you if that'll make you happy. Now, c'mon, Snips makes the <em>best</em> hotcakes."<br/>The three sit down to eat, and it's not long before the younger two have him laughing and joking like normal again. The light of Coruscant Prime shines through the windows, illuminating the joy on their countenances as they take a moment of respite together.  </p><p>"Snips?" Anakin asks, standing in the middle of a starburst of broken glass, a dropped stack of glasses he'd been bringing into their quarters. Ahsoka and Barriss stand at least six feet apart, but their flushed expressions and the disarray of their respective clothes, paired with the sad looking abandoned datapads they were <em>supposed</em> to be studying clued him in to exactly what they were doing instead. <br/>"Master! I thought you were going to be gone until 1900!" Her tone is accusatory, the effect somewhat ruined due to the fact that she uses it while attempting to straighten her crooked tunic and belt. <br/>"I-" His answer is interrupted by a knock on the door.<br/>"Anakin?" Obi-Wan Kenobi's voice calls from the other side. "Can I come in, or should I wait out here until you've fixed your hair?" His tone is cuttingly sarcastic, making it unmistakably clear exactly what the answer should be.<br/>"Uh, one minute." Anakin calls back, looking panicked.<br/>"I was kidding, I don't care what state your hair is in."<br/>"That's good, but give me a second, master." <br/>"Anakin, this is heavy."<br/>"I'm sorry! Just-just a little longer." Barriss is still frozen in place, she's made no move to her smooth her hood or skirts, despite Anakin's frantic gestures.<br/>"Anakin, I'm coming in." The doors hiss open, revealing to Obi-Wan Kenobi the full extent of the situation; Anakin frantically trying to aid the two young women in getting themselves presentable, their untidy appearances not much better due to the minute of respite. <br/>"Master Kenobi, I can explain-" Ahsoka tries, then stops at his raised palm.  There's a silence, then he turns to the three of them, and gestures at a seemingly nonexistent object.<br/>"Behold! The field in which I grow my fucks to give. Lay thine eyes upon it, and thou shalt see that it is barren." Having said thus, he drops his package on the table with a loud thunk, and exits, robes swishing around the corner. They stand, shocked, for a moment<br/>"Now I get where you got your dramatics from, Skyguy." Ahsoka grumbles. "C'mon, Barriss, the fresher's that way, I'll get the datapads."</p><p>With Palpatine dead, Anakin happily living his new philosophies, and the clones chipless, things progress as they should, even if no one quite realizes how closely the future almost veered off a different path entirely.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>i'm so sorry this entire thing took so long, i was distracted because i think i'm gonna post a sequel to my senator anakin/jedi padme au, but i want to have a reserve of chapters before i do.<br/>in other news, i'm moving, so that might halt my writing for a bit, but i have a couple of half finished drafts, so i might do those. expect some form of time travel.</p><p>i finished this one on a fast day, and apologize if some of it isn't quite up to scratch.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. How The Jango Fett Saved The Galaxy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>what if jango was force-sensitive, and midichlorians really did have something to do with genetics, mashed up with that one tumblr post about the jedi showing up on his doorstep ready to fight him for custody of the clones and boba fett's space youtube account.<br/>palps is sitting in the background watching his plans crash and burn going 'no. no. noooooo!'</p><p>edit: the clones clearly aren't mentally that young, but chronologically they are, and because children can be more mentally mature than their age mates, and because species grow at very different rates, it wouldn't make sense for age limits and the like to go according to mental or physical age.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Mando'a translations:</p><p>buir - dad/mom/parent</p><p>jetti - Jedi</p><p>vod - brother/sister/sibling, plural is vode - brothers/sisters/siblings</p><p>ik'aad - baby, toddler, child under age three</p><p>nayc - no</p><p>par gar - for you</p><p>vor entye - thank you (lit. 'I accept a debt)</p><p>bic mesh'la - it's beautiful</p><p>Ni kar'taylir gar darsuum - I love you (lit. I hold you in my heart eternally [I think.])</p><p>Kyr'tsad - The Death Watch</p><p>Haat Mandoade - the True Mandalorians</p><p>ad'ika - kid</p><p>buy'ce - bucket, helmet </p><p>dar'jetti - no longer a Jedi/Sith</p><p>jetti'kad - lightsaber (lit. Jedi sword/saber)</p><p>ad - son/daughter/child - plural - ade</p><p>ori'vod - older brother/sister/sibling</p><p>birikad - baby carrier</p><p>ka'ra - the stars, alternatively, the ancient ruling council of fallen Mandalorian kings</p><p>areutii - traitor/foreigner/outsider</p><p>dar'manda - no longer Mandalorian, one who has lost his heritage, and so his identity and soul</p><p>aliit - family</p><p>laandur - fragile, breakable, can be an insult</p><p>osi'yaim - someone useless/despicable</p><p>riduur - wife/husband/spouse</p><p>dar'buir - no longer a parent</p><p>skanah - much hated thing or person</p><p>ba'vodu - aunt/uncle/sibling of a parent</p><p>'lek - short for elek, meaning yes</p><p>agol - flesh and blood</p><p>verd'ika - affectionate term meaning little warrior</p><p>anade - everyone</p><p>demagolka - basically the Mandalorian version of Joseph Mengle  </p><p>dinii - lunatic</p><p>ne'johaa - shut up</p><p>ba'buir - grandfather/grandmother/grandparent</p><p>haar'chak - damn it</p><p>niduraa - you disgust me</p><p>mandokarla - having the right stuff; as in Mandalorian traits such as bravery and spirit</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>The feed is black. There's a low murmur of voices in the background, nothing discernible, except for the occasional cheerful shout. <br/>
</em>
</p><p>"Hi, my name is Boba-oh, I forgot to turn on the optics, didn't I?" </p><p>
  <em>There's some noise, someone fiddling with the holorecorder, and then the darkness switches out for an image of a young boy with a tanned complexion, messy black curls and eyes like liquid gold. He's wearing some type of ivory tunic and a belt, and a very wide grin. He waves at the screen. <br/>
</em>
</p><p>"Hi! My name is Boba Fett, and I'm gonna tell you guys about how my <em>buir</em> saved the galaxy."</p><p><em>From off to the side, a muffled voice shouts back: </em>"I did not!"</p><p>"Well, his genetics, anyway." Boba shrugs. "Master Ti, she's one of the nicer <em>jetti</em>, said this could be my history project if I tried the charming grin and porg eyes on Madame Nu and got her to add it to the Archives. Some background information, in case whoever's watching this was living under a rock for the past five years and didn't hear about the Clone Wars; I'm Force-sensitive,"</p><p>
  <em>He pauses to snatch a small object off the surface the recorder is resting on, it looks vaguely like a thermal detonator.</em>
</p><p>"And so are my four point seven million brothers also are, because we're all exact clones of my <em>buir</em>, and he's Force-sensitive. Say hi, <em>vode</em>!" </p><p>
  <em>He lifts the device, pointing it at the rest of what we now see is a really big room, scattered with tables, some holding food, others stacks of datapads for studying. It holds, on estimate, maybe six to eight dozen men, interspersed with a few senients of other species. They look very similar; upon closer examination, they're identical but for a few superficial cosmetic differences. Most of them look up, waving at the holorecorder. Boba places it back on the desk. </em>
</p><p>"It's a really long story, but it starts like this..."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>It's raining on Concord Dawn tonight. Tucked safe and dry inside the Fett homestead, sits a little boy, all of two years old. His mother is holding him, leaning her back against the old, patched sofa in front of the fire. They're not technology people, much, the Fetts. They prefer a good, old-fashioned blaze to any kind of droid. <br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The walls are smooth duracrete, the floor actual wood from trees felled in storms just like the one raging outside the doors. <br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The little boy giggles, grabbing at the end of his mother's long braid. <br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>No<em>, ik'aad." She tells him, tugging it gently from the grip of his chubby little fingers. "Nayc, </em>Jango<em>." </em></p><p>
  <em>He frowns for a moment, then focuses on a shelf of baubles, bolted securely to the dark crimson wall, past her shoulder. One of them, a piece of wood carved and painted to look like a nova lily, floats over to him, landing in his little hands. He toddles over to where his sister, only a few years older, is sitting on the floor, carefully cleaning a blaster, and presents it to her. <br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"Par gar, </em>Arla<em>!" He says, grinning. She accepts the gift with a serious nod, examining it, then smiling at her brother.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"Vor entye, </em>Jango<em>. Bic mesh'la." He cheers, and wraps his chubby little arms around her neck. <br/>
</em></p><p>
  <em>"Ni kar'taylir gar darsuum." She tells him.</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"<em>Buir </em>doesn't talk about his parents a lot. I don't know the whole story; they were killed, something to do with the civil war and the <em>Kyr'tsad</em>. I wish I could have met them, they sounded really special. Arla; my <em>ba'vodu</em>, survived. She and <em>buir</em> led the Haat Mandoade who were staying with them to an irrigation pipe after they rescued him, because the <em>Kyr'tsad</em> set fire to the fields. Jaster Mereel, the <em>Mand'alor</em>, adopted <em>buir</em> and my aunt." <em>Boba's arms are crossed over his chest. He's pulled a chair over and is sitting in it. </em></p><p><em>A few of the men, presumably his brothers, pass behind his area. One of them, blond, ruffles his curls. </em>"Hey! I'll bite you, Rex!"<em> Boba threatens, scowling but not moving his eyes from the holorecorder. </em>"This is important!"</p><p>"Leave that to Wolffe, Bob'ika." <em>He calls back.<br/>
</em></p><p>"Anyway, where was I? Oh right, Jaster Mereel." </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>"</em>Jango<em>?" There's a crash as half a dozen objects fall to the ground at Jaster's voice. Luckily enough, none of them are breakable. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>I-<em>" The young man is frozen in place, eyes wide with panicked fear. "</em>I can explain.<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>Jaster's moves silently to pick up one of the things that had been floating, Jango's </em>buy'ce<em>. He examines it for a minute.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>You're not some kind of <em>jetti, </em>right?<em>" Jaster asks.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>No, no. Not <em>dar'jetti</em>, either. I just-I don't know, Arla says that I've always been able to do it, since I was small. I practice, because it might be useful in a fight someday.<em>" Jaster frowns.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Can Arla do it too?<em>" <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"Nayc. </em>Just me.<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Hmm. Well, who am I to say what you should do in your spare time. Just don't go picking up some <em>jetii'kad</em>, otherwise I don't think the rest will believe you.<em>" Jango's relief is palpable, and when he stands, Jaster pulls him into a rough hug. "</em>Just-tell me next time you're going to do something like this, <em>ad</em>? I'm not as young as I used to be.<em>" Jango hugs back tighter.</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"The Mand'alor died at the battle of Korda Six. That's all I know, because buir never talks about it. I don't blame him. It's hard for me to talk about Geonosis, and he wasn't even in that much danger. I thought he was, though."</p><p>
  <em>Someone tall approaches Boba from the side, we can't see their face. They are probably Togruta, if the striped lekku falling to about a foot above their belt are anything to go on They hand him a mug of something hot. He looks inside.<br/>
</em>
</p><p>"Thanks, ori'vod!" <em>He sounds positively delighted. <br/>
</em></p><p>"Whatcha doing, Boba?" <em>The person asks.<br/>
</em></p><p>"Recording my history project. Shaak Ti said if I get Madame Nu to accept it to the Archives then I don't have to write a paper."</p><p>"Huh. Interesting."</p><p>"AHSOKA TANO!"<em> Someone shouts off to the side.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Oops, gotta go. Good luck, kid."<em> The Togruta lopes off. </em>"Hey Barriss!"<em> She says cheerfully.<br/>
</em></p><p>"Don't you 'hey, Barriss' me! Please explain what your company did to the creche's baby carriers."</p><p>"I have no idea. Hardcase said they were going to make you proper birikad-Oh. It has-"</p><p>"Spikes, and thermal detonators, yes." Boba grins. </p><p>"Back to the story."<em> He says, as the voices fade out. </em>"Galidraan."<em> The smile slips off his face.</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Moonlight slips silently through a tear in the tent's fabric, illuminating the tired face of a young man, reflecting off his close-shorn black curls and coloring them a luminous silver. The tent is silent. Then his expression twists, and he lets out a cry, bolting upright. He sits there for a moment, then pushes out of his bedroll, trades his sleep pants for a thermal undersuit. He rushes off into the night, arriving at a tent some two minutes away and rapping on the main pole. <br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>Myles!<em> Vod,</em> wake up!<em>" Another Mandalorian, bare-chested and wearing only a pair of soft sleep shorts, stumbles out.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Jango? What in the name of the<em> ka'ra </em>are you doing up at,<em>" He checks the chronometer on his wrist. "</em>Oh karking hundred?<em>" <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Myles, they have to leave. They have to leave now.<em>" Jango stresses, grabbing his second in command's wrist tight. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>What? Who, Jango<em>?"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>All of them. Everyone. The governor is with the <em>Kyr'tsad,</em> they contacted the Republic. The <em>jetti </em>are coming, they were told we killed 'political activists' and innocents. They're coming to kill us.<em>" </em></p><p>
  <em>Several other people are slowly  making their way out of various tents at the disturbance.<br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"Alor</em>, what do you mean?<em>" Myles asks, alarmed. He's awake now.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>We need to get everyone off planet. Myles-<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>I get it, I get it. How do you know, though? They will ask, what do I tell them<em>?"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Tell them that if they trust me, and value their lives, they should listen.<em>" Jango set off at a run, knocking on tent poles, determined to get his people to safety.</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"Most of them listened to him." <em>Boba says, staring at the holorecorder, head tilted slightly. </em>"They trusted him, and he'd had true dreams before. They all knew about the Mand'alor's odd ability to sometimes tell the future. Buir met the jetti with a few others too stubborn to leave, including Myles. He wanted to try to find a peaceful solution." <em>Boba's eyes darken in anger, jaw clenching. </em>"They killed every single one of them. Buir tore six jetti to pieces with his bare hands, and it wasn't enough. Kyr'tsad captured him, stole his armor and sold him into slavery."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Jango Fett, twenty-two years old, was trying to bore a hold in the durasteel wall of the cargo hold of the spice freighter where the slaves were kept. There was a collar around his neck, thicker than those of the other slaves. He couldn't feel anything. He hadn't realized it until they'd snapped it around his neck, that not everyone could see with their eyes closed, the plants and people and animals like flames. <br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The thing around his neck had poured water on those flames. <br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>In some ways, it was a blessing. He didn't die right along with Loyo as he had with his parents when the slavers made the Iktotchi try to cold-shirt it and fix the engine. He couldn't feel Relia's terror as one of the masters grabbed her arm in a vice grip and dragged her to his quarters.<br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He couldn't feel Arla, either, as he had always been able to, no matter how far apart they got.<br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And then pirates boarded the freighter. <br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Jango was never one to give up a chance when he saw it. He broke his restraints, and stole a blaster.</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"Buir found someone to get the collar off his neck, and made his way to Galidraan. He broke into the governor's castle, found his armor, and made that <em>areutii</em>  tell him the location of the Kyr'tsad. Arla hunted him down while he was making short work of the their <em>dar'manda</em> leader, Vizla. He got stabbed with a poisoned blade, but survived. She got him some help, 'cause slavery and all, which, by the way, someone should have done for Anakin." </p><p>"That's what I said." <em>Another one of the clones says, approaching Boba from behind. His hair is shaved on the sides, and you can read the words 'The only good droid is a dead one.' inked into his scalp. </em></p><p>"Hey, Kix."<em> Boba greets, turning to him. <br/>
</em></p><p>"What part are you at, vod?"<em> Kix asks, ruffling Boba's hair.<br/>
</em></p><p>"Hey, stop that! I'm just getting to the Bando Gora."</p><p>"Oh, I've heard this bit. Cody asked Jango and Rex was listening in. He told us when we were stuck on that deployment to Saltrioone."</p><p>"It's interesting, isn't it?"  He turns back to the recorder. "Well, this guy named Tyranus approached buir, and offered him five million credits to find the darjetti leader of the Bando Gora named Komari Vosa. It was him and a bunch of other bounty hunters, including Montross, who was responsible for Jaster Mereel's death. </p><p>"Stuff happened that you can probably find in reports somewhere, I don't know most of it. The Bando Gora captured him, and tried to make him become one of them, that's where he got most of his scars from. Tyranus showed up, killed Vosa, and made him the offer to be the template for a clone army. That's how all of us," He gestures to himself, and then picks up the recorder to pan it around the room. There are less clones there now, but a few wave, and several others shout good-naturedly to Boba. "Were... Uh, conceptualized. Yeah, that works. Oh, kark, I'm late for a saber lesson. We're learning a form called Shii-Cho, it's pretty cool. I'll finish this later. Bye!"</p><p>
  <em>He waves, and the feed goes sideways, with a last shot of Boba's excited grin, and blinks out.</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>The feed starts exactly the same as last time. Then, picture blinks into existence. <br/>
</em>
</p><p>"I remembered the optics this time!"<em> Boba cheers, triumphant. </em>"Hi guys! Me again. I'm done with my saber class. It was pretty cool, even if Drallig's got a stick bigger than Kenobi's up his shebs. Anyway, last time I covered everything about my buir. Now there's us. Because midichlorian count; that's what makes you Force-sensitive or not, a high midichlorian count, is partially influenced by genetics, and all of us are exact clones of buir, we all have identical counts. That's why I can do this,"</p><p><em>He reaches out of view and comes back with a spoon. He glares at it, and it begins to float. </em>"And so can all my brothers."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>The Kaminiise are despairing. They've gone over their calculations half a dozen times, checked everything that could have gone wrong, and they can't find any reason at all why the Alpha batch has come out like this. Jango smiles inside his buy'ce from where he's leaning against the wall, arms crossed over his breastplate. Something taps him on the side of the bucket, and he checks his heads up display. It's a small, colorful, plast block. He grabs it, and turns to hand it back to the clone. 17, if he recalls correctly. <br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>Crouching down, he presses it into the little hand. The baby smiles up at him with big, bright eyes, and something in him says </em>ik'aad<em>.</em> <span class="u">Aliit</span>.<em> <span class="u">No</span>, he tells it. <span class="u">They're clones, not-</span> But you asked a son, it snaps back. How will he be any different than these </em>ade<em>? That stops him. <br/>
</em></p><p>
  <em>He snatches up a block, striding over to one of the Kaminii, Nala Se. <br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>They're not defective, Se.<em>" He calls while still halfway across the room. Her gaze slowly swings to face him.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Then why are they doing,<em>" She pauses to gesture at the roomful of tiny ik'aade floating toys, themselves and each other. A small group of them have found their way over to one of the Kaminiise, surrounded him in a ragged circle, and appear to be working together to lift him.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>As Jango watches, his feet lift slightly off the ground, and then he starts flailing, surprising the children. They drop him, and he lands on his shebs, shrieking, and causing them to erupt into giggles. "</em>That<em>."<br/>
</em></p><p>
  <em>Jango grins from the safety of his helmet. <br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>Here, look, I can do it too.<em>" He opens his hand, and floats the block in lazy patterns around her head. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>And you didn't think to tell us this, Fett?<em>" She's angry, as much as these laandur osi'yaim can be.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>No. I didn't think it was genetic, so I had no idea it mattered.<em>" He replies, colder than an icicle on Hoth. She frowns, and walks off, clearly displeased.</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"Yeah, Nala Se's a real piece of work." <em>Kix comments from where he's perched on the edge of a close table, then lifts a forearm to his eyes as his vambraces ping with an incoming message. They're the only armor most brothers wear unless they're leaving the temple. He stares at it incomprehensibly, then mutters, quietly: </em>"What the fuck, Jesse."<em> Boba's smile grows into a full blown smirk. <br/>
</em></p><p>"What'd he do?"<em> He asks curiously. Silently, Kix slides of the table and walks over to show him. </em>"Oh. Wow, okay, that's bad. Uh, how did he even-"</p><p>"I don't know!"<em> Kix moans. </em>"It shouldn't be anatomically possible! I mean-"</p><p>"Hey, <em>buir</em>!"<em> Boba cuts him off with an earsplitting shout. </em>"Is there maybe something you'd like to share?"</p><p>"You don't need to shout so loudly, Boba. And what do you mean?"<em> Jango Fett makes his way over, dressed in simple clothes, with a halo of small random medical supplies floating just above his head. He pulls out a bacta patch in order to chuck it at a clone, who catches it and stares confusedly. Then a fork comes flying over from another table, and embeds itself in his arm. He yelps, pulling it out and tossing it back before unwrapping the patch and pressing it onto the wound. He smiles at Jango, who nods back and leans in to look at Kix's comm. The blood drains out of his face. </em>"Oh."</p><p>"Yeah. And you didn't tell us because..."</p><p>"I have to go help my <em>riduur</em> deal with this, you can explain on the way."<em> Kix walks off briskly, Jango in tow. <br/>
</em></p><p>"What. The. Fuck."<em> Boba mutters quietly, then seems to remember he's recording, and says: </em>"Oops. I'll edit that out later. Probably. Anyway, next bit; how the custody battle started."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Obi-Wan Kenobi stands in the Jedi Order's pod, cursing himself for not making Mace go into detail on the specifications of the favor he'd exacted.He knows that Mace always requests the most ridiculous things, the entire Council does, really, so how in the world did he end up in this situation. <br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>I cannot believe you managed to talk me into this.<em>" He hisses at his companion. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Yes, you can.<em>" Mace replies calmly. "</em>Because you know that if I got up there instead, there would be a kriff ton of cursing on my part, Ponds would have my head, and Yoda would break your shins for allowing me to misrepresent the Jedi Order in such a way.<em>" <br/>
</em></p><p>
  <em>Grudgingly, Obi-Wan concedes. All of that is true, but at the same time, he's not sure he won't end up yelling at the Senate himself. <br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Of all the things, really. This is why he doesn't trust politicians. They make the rules, and then promptly break them whenever it best serves their own agendas.<br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And suddenly he was so tired. They'd been fighting this war on both fronts for two years already, and so many had died already. Far too many.<br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>This war was disaster after disaster.<br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Christophsis, the Malevolence, Rishi Station, the Blue Shadow virus-<br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>Obi-Wan.<em>" Mace whispers, and for a moment he sounds exactly like Qui-Gon used to, and that also hurts. "</em>Focus on the matter at hand.<em>" <br/>
</em></p><p>
  <em>Obi-Wan dips his head in thanks, and gathers his thoughts up. <br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>Petition six two nine seven zero five three!<em>" The Vice Chair calls, and Obi-Wan presses a hand to the pod's dashboard, and it floats forward. "</em>Master Jedi? Is everything all right?<em>" Mas Amedda asks, confused.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Perfectly, Vice Chair. You might notice that the Jedi Order is the applicant on that petition form. I am present as their spokesperson.<em>" He's slipped into his 'Negotiator' persona, accompanied by what Anakin like to call 'The accent of someone who has a wroshyr tree stuck so far up their shebs that they're tasting leaves'. Obi-Wan, of course, does not approve of this name for it.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>This is highly unusual.<em>" The Supreme Chancellor looks surprised. Unpleasantly so. Inwardly, Obi-Wan smirks. A Jedi should not revel in the discomfort of others.<br/>
</em></p><p>
  <em>Sometimes, Obi-Wan isn't a very good Jedi.<br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>I agree, Chancellor. However, the Council thinks this is a matter of some urgency, and worth petitioning the Senate directly.<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Very well, then.<em>" The man concedes, and Obi-Wan's polite expression morphs into a sharp-toothed grin. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Thank you.<em>" The pod floats up to a suitable position, and Obi-Wan straightens, shoulders pulling back. Cody, from where he's standing at the back of the pod, is sure, even though he can't see Obi-Wan's expression, that it is akin to one of a suitably  fearsome predator. "</em>Senators, were any of you aware of the fact that, under Republic law, it's considered a war crime to employ, enlist or indenture children? And because different species age at different rates, the law also provides an entire list of every known species and at what age they are considered a legal adult.<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Master Kenobi, I fail to see how this is relevant to,<em>" The Chancellor glances down at a datapad. "</em>Your petition.<em>" He finishes lamely, clearly unable to interpret whatever technically correct legal mumbo-jumbo Anakin got Domino Squad to put together for the application. They couldn't have him knowing, not yet.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>You'll see in a minute, your Excellency. Please, humor me. Now, the age for Standard Humans is eighteen and above. And this is why,<em>" His voice goes cold enough that he might as well be spitting ice. "</em>I'm sure that, somehow, not a single senator in this room knows of the existence of this law, much as it isn't particularly obscure.<em>" The huge room is silent.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>What do you mean by this?<em>" He doesn't recognize the person speaking. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Because the clone troopers are fifty two percent Standard Human, which is fairly normal for Mandalorians, and, Commander, if you will?<em>"  One of the Coruscant Guard commanders, Thire, Cody thinks, but can't be sure because he's too far away, fiddles with the dashboard of the Chancellor's platform. Something large projects into the space. "</em>This, senators, is the combined results of genetic testing done on several clone volunteers. They show that the clones age physically about twice as fast as is typical for humans. This, I presume, is public knowledge. However, the law goes by chronological-not physical-age.<em>" He pauses to let this sink in. "</em>Therefore, the Senate, as the governing body of the Republic and the party overseeing the army, has two years worth of war crimes to answer for.<em>" It's deathly silent for about a minute, and then the building erupts with mutters, shouts and noise in general. <br/>
</em></p><p>
  <em>It takes the Chancellor about half an hour to get everyone back under control.<br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"This is a serious accusation indeed, Master Kenobi."<br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>We've fact-checked everything repeatedly, Chancellor. I believe you'll find that we have an airtight case, as well as the ability to retain very good lawyers, should the Senate feel the desire to test that in court<em>." He's bland, the time for fierceness having passed. Now he'll show them that they can't get to him. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>I'm sure none of us were aware of this.<em>" The Chancellor looks around, clearly faking honest confusion. "</em>What would the Jedi Order have us do?<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>The Separatists have called a ceasefire and an attempt at a peace summit. We have, hopefully, a few months to figure this out. The tests turned up a sufficient midichlorian count identical in all the clones to be accepted as initiates in the temple.<em>" The  susurration grows louder. "</em>Given that the Republic has only now realized that the clone troopers are, in fact, child soldiers and seemingly orphans, and there is no age limit to being accepted into the Jedi Order according to Republic law, the fact that the clones are Force-sensitive places them in the Jedi's jurisdiction, provided that the are agreeable.<em>" Obi-Wan holds his breath; this is the cincher.  Either the Senate caves or they prove publicly that they have no regard for law and are willing to commit war crimes."<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Ah, but the clones aren't orphans.<em>" Palpatine has a crafty look about him. "</em>I do believe they consider their genetic template their progenitor, no? And as far as I am aware, he is not a Republic citizen, therefore it's a private matter whether or not he turns his children over to the order.<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>If I may, Chancellor?<em>" Cody steps up besides Obi-Wan. There are no objections, so he proceeds. "</em>Most of us consider Fett to be <em>dar'buir</em>, meaning they've renounced him. Under the law of the True Mandalorians, whom he leads, this means he's of no legal relation to us.<em>" That would likely make them liable to apply for citizenship as wards of the Republic, and thereby custody of the Jedi, as all Force-sensitives is similar situations were. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>The Republic doesn't recognize True Mandalorian law!<em>" A senator calls, and it dawns on Obi-Wan. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>And therefore according to Republic records, you're all his children.<em>" He murmurs, then Palpatine raises raises his voice. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Master Kenobi! If the Jedi were to send a delegation to Fett and he were to agree to give the Order custody of his children, the Senate would be agreeable. Assuming you can track him down. Now, if there's no more business, I do believe we've run out of time. Session adjourned.<em>" </em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"Yeah, Palpatine was a real <em>skanah</em>." <em>Boba says, lounging in his chair. <br/>
</em></p><p>"Boba!"<em> Someone in the background reprimands. </em>"Watch your kriffing language!"<em> Boba swivels to look at them, and aims a suitably rude gesture in the speaker's direction. <br/>
</em></p><p>"I don't think I know that one." <em>Another person rumbles from behind the recording. Boba turns back fast enough to give anyone whiplash.<br/>
</em></p><p>"<em>Buir</em>! I'm recording. Come say hi!" <em>There's some low muttering, but someone walks into the range to stand next to Boba, who tilts the camera up obligingly.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>At first glance, he looks like another clone. It's not the scars that clue us in, plenty of  clone have them, but how old he looks. The clones don't have a uniform age, as they were born some years apart form others, but this man's cropped dark hair is heavily streaked with silver, and there's a certain ancient sadness in his brown eyes.</em> </p><p>"This is my<em> buir</em>, Jango Fett." <em>Boba introduces. Jango waves slightly. </em>"Hey, <em>buir</em>, have you heard from<em> Ba'vodu</em> Arla recently?"</p><p>"About a week ago," <em>Jango answers, ruffling Boba's mop of curls absentmindedly. </em>"She's likely occupied with her duties as Mand'alor. Why?"</p><p>"Just wondering."</p><p>"Well, finish your wondering for today, because it's  twenty two hundred, and time for you to go to bed, <em>ad</em>."</p><p>"Do I have to?" <em>Boba complains, slumping.<br/>
</em></p><p>"<em>'Lek</em>. You're only<em> agol, verd'ika. </em>You need your sleep."</p><p>"Oof, fine. Bye, see you next time."<em> The film jars as Boba picks up the holorecorder and then goes black.</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>The scene flickers into existence. It's a kitchen with walls painted a warm shade of yellow and plants spilling all over half the surfaces. There's a sliver of window visible, and through skylanes heavy with traffic we can see snippets of pale blue sky, the kind of color that paints itself on the horizon when it's too early for even the sun to be awake. Boba stands by the sink, soaping dishes. <br/>
</em>
</p><p>"Hey<em> anade.</em>" <em>He yawns sleepily. </em>"It's pretty early here, but I... couldn't sleep," <em>It's fairly clear that this is code for 'had a nightmare'. </em>"So I figured I'd work on this. I think I left off with the Senate, right? Yeah. Well, the Senate, or actually, probably Supreme Chancellor<em> Demagolka</em>, picked a group of <em>jetti</em>..."</p><p><em>"</em>Get your <em>kriffing</em> foot out of my face, Anakin!<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>That's not my foot, master, Snips is sitting on my legs.<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Yeah, well, you're crushing my lek with your pointy karking elbows, Skyguy!<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Padawan Tano!<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Sorry Master Biliba, but it's true.<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Obi-Wan Kenobi, if you don't move your head this second-<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Don't get your robes in a twist, Mace. I'm moving.<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Master, do you think you could, um, maybe move a little? You're kind of crushing me, a bit.<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Of course, Caleb. I'm sorry.<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Ponds, that's my kidney!<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Well maybe you should have worn your shell, fluffhead!<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p>
  <em>It hadn't been complete coincidence that they were the Jedi sent for this mission in particular. The Senate' s reasoning had been that Obi-Wan, Mace and Depa were the only dirtside members of the order qualified, and Anakin was mostly there as a thug, to help protect everyone if things went sideways. <br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Of course, the fact that all four of  them were rather outspoken about the failings of the Republic had nothing to do with it. Nothing at all. <br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It also had nothing to do with the fact that they were given the tiniest, most beat up, out of date cruiser available. <br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The on board lights had gone out about half an hour ago, and there wasn't really enough room in the hold for all eight of them.<br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>Why do Cody and Grey get to pilot?<em>" Anakin asks suddenly, from where he's squished between Ahsoka and Obi-Wan. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Because you value your life, and don't want to be brutally murdered by Mace when you crash us through an asteroid belt.<em>" Obi-Wan replies promptly. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Have you done that before?<em>" Caleb inquires, sitting crosslegged on Depa's lap. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Yes.<em>" Obi-Wan answers, exactly as Anakin protests 'No!' "</em>It was a rather unpleasant experience I'm assured none of us want to repeat.<em>" <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Exiting hyperspace,<em>" Cody's calm voice says from the wall mounted comm unit. "</em>In three... two... one.<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p>
  <em>There's a jolt, and more than a few yelps as they crash around the hold. The lights flicker back on a few minutes later.<br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>Anakin! That is improper use of the Force!<em>" Obi-Wan calls indignantly up to his former padawan.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>It's conserving Republic resources.<em>" Anakin replies from where he's clinging to the ceiling. "</em>This way, I don't need bacta for a broken arm.<em>" Obi-Wan opens his mouth to reply, when Ahsoka taps him on the shoulder and gestures to her own bandaged wrist. "</em>Exactly. Thank you, Snips.<em>" Anakin sounds smug. Mace sighs and shakes his head. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Commanders!<em>" He calls to the cockpit. "</em>How long until we land?<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>T-minus two minutes, sir!<em>" Grey replies. There's a lurch, flinging Anakin off the ceiling and onto Ahsoka's montrals as Mace careens across the hold to Depa and Caleb, landing heavily on his shoulder with an ugly cracking sound. <br/>
</em></p><p>
  <em>As soon as the ship is steadied, Caleb bolts across the room to the medpac stashed with the rations. <br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>No bone-knitter, why is there no bone-knitter in the kit?<em>" He asks. "</em>Here, master, I found some cloth, we can make a sling out of it. Are you alright? What kind of break is it? Does it hurt a lot?<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Stop fretting, padawan, I'm fine.<em>" Mace grumbles, wincing as Depa prods at his collarbone. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>I think it's a clean break, Caleb.<em>" She says, taking the offered material and poking her former master until he grumpily supports his left arm so she can pass the fabric under his arm and around his shoulders. Caleb tugs the two ends from her grip, tying them in a secure knot.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Here, Mace, take these.<em>" Obi-Wan tosses a pack of painkillers across the hold. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>No<em>." <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Yes.<em>" Depa replies firmly, popping several out of the flimsi packet and holding them out. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>No. I am a fully grown Jedi Master, and if I don't want to take analgesics, then I don't...<em>" He trails off as Caleb's shoulders slump, and he turns impossibly big, sad eyes on his grandmaster. "</em>Have... To-fine! Fine, I'm taking them, see?<em>" Mace grouches, snatching the round tablets from Depa's outstretched hand and swallowing them. He waits a few seconds, then sags woozily as the drugs hit his system. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>I hate these.<em>" He groans, before slumping all the way to the floor. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Jedi don't hate, master.<em>" Depa says serenely, earning herself one last glare before the Korun Jedi's eyes shut. She absently brushes a hand across the scar on her forehead, where her Mark of Greater Illumination had been.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Are those the sedative ones?<em>" Ahsoka asks from where Anakin is fussing over the scratches his mech hand left on her right lek. Caleb tugs the packet away from his master, reading the back of it. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Yeah, somaprin.<em>" He answers. "</em>You need some?<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Ow, Skyguy!<em>" She tugs away from Anakin when he attempts to adjust the crinkled edge of the bacta patch, apparently forgetting that the sticki had already attached itself to the sensitive surface of her head-tail. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Sorry! Sorry!<em>" <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>No, I'm allergic.<em>" She replies to Caleb, rubbing a hand along the length of her injured organ. "</em>Ugh, I hate bacta on my lekku<em>." </em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>By the time they manage to make sense of the directions to Fett's house, it has been twelve standard hours since they set of from the on-planet quarters and the planet's dusk has begun to creep over the spaceport city, crimson rays sinking between the buildings to the horizon. Ahsoka glances over at Caleb's grandmaster, and something cold crawls up her spine at his red-lit expression.<br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>Everything alright, Master Windu?<em>" She asks, extending her strides to catch up with the Korun Jedi. He glances down at her, and the anger radiating clear into the Force from his core, dyed the same shade as the receding sun and just as hot, fuzzes at the edges and slowly seeps away.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Yes, padawan. Thank you for your concern.<em>" He says, not unkindly. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Okay<em>." She pauses, biting her lip. "</em>Rex says that talking about it helps when you're angry.<em>" She ventures after a moment of consideration. He laughs, surprisingly, though there's little mirth to the sound.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Your captain is a very wise man, then. Alright.<em>" He says, pitching his tone low enough that the man in question won't overhear. The last of the sharp feeling dissipates. "</em>I'm simply... Regretful. It's, well, Count Dooku was a-a friend of mine, back before everything. When he was still a Jedi." He stops to take in her stricken look, and smiles, except it's full of sharp edges and emotions she'd always believed Jedi shouldn't have. "That's part of why I went after Fett on Geonosis instead of him. There were other reasons, granted, and I probably wouldn't be standing here if I had, but I couldn't even do that. Couldn't deal with a single bounty hunter. If I had, we wouldn't have to do this.<em>" Silence falls while Ahsoka gathers her thoughts, filled with a low background murmur. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>I don't think it's your fault, master.<em>" She says finally. "</em>To be honest, if Skyguy or Master Obi-Wan Fell, I don't know if I could fight them either. And Jango Fett once killed six Jedi with his bare hands<em>." Mace contemplates her words for a moment, turning them over in his head, then nods.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Thank you, padawan.<em>" She flashes him a cheeky grin.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Race you!<em>" And takes off running to catch up with the rest of their group. He rolls his eyes even as the corners of his mouth twitch. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Padawans<em>." He grumbles, and, looking around to make sure no one is watching, takes off at a sprint. He almost wins. </em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>It's ninteen hundred hours, and there are people arguing on Jango's doorstep. They're arguing quietly, but he'd chosen today of all days to repot the tiny muja trees Boba had decided to grow from the seed in the front hall, so he can hear snatches of conversation.<br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>...kill me on sight.<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>...like all of us, we're...<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>...it a misunderstanding?<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"Y</em>es, but...six with his...<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>I'll do it!<em>" <br/>
</em></p><p>
  <em>At the last, Jango gives up on waiting. He gets up, brushing the dirt from his clothes, and opens the door, seconds before one of the people standing on his doorstep could press the buzzer.<br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He closes his eyes for a moment, then opens them, both eyebrows raised. There are still six Jedi and four clones crowded onto his front steps. </em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Sixteen hours earlier, in rented quarters while everyone recovers from the journey...</em>
</p><p><em>There's a soft thump as Skywalker drops down next to him, pulling his knees up and hugging them to his chest. <br/>
"</em>Hey, Rex.<em>"</em></p><p><em>"</em>Sir<em>." <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>You okay?<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>As much as I can be.<em>" Anakin sighs. The air between them fills with a comfortable silence. The light creeping through the window heralds the dawn, and Rex closes his eyes and allows himself to breathe. He's worried, so worried for his idiotic jetti who are insisting on going themselves, rather then permitting the clones to go alone. Fett has torn  this exact number of them to pieces with bare hands. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Is-is Cody alright?<em>" His general ask, and not for the first time that day, Rex remembers exactly how much he has to be thankful for, that his jetti cares.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>He will be, I think. It's-he left, you know? Fett. He pretended to be there for us, trained the first batches himself. Not mine, so I'm not as-I'm not so affected, but Cody...<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>I get it.<em>" And Rex knows he does.</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Boba sighs, then coughs a bit. Pulling a glass of water over from out of  view, he takes a sip. He's meandered his way over to the same big hall, and there are a few groups of early rising clones behind him.<br/>
</em>
</p><p>"Sorry, some Corellian thing going around the temple. It sucks, 'cause Skywalker can't bring his ik'aad around now, because it can be really bad in kids." There's a pause.</p><p>"Yeah, buir was not very happy when half a dozen Jetti showed up at our door asking him to hand the entire clone army over to them. They fought a lot, and took turns trying to convince him to go along with the plan."</p><p>"And Boba here, was, of course, curious about us."</p><p>"<em>Ne'johaa</em>, Cody."<em> Boba replies laconically, batting his brother's hands away when he's in danger of being patted on the head. </em>"Of course I was."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Boba freezes, turning slowly to meet the gaze of a tiny little jetti, who is staring at him with wide brown eyes, a bottle of juice and a few cookies in one hand. He gives half a grin and a little wave. The kid nods, not taking his eyes off Boba and offers him one of the biscuits. He's actually miniature, can't be more than eight or nine. Boba takes it. It's good.<br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>Who're you?<em>" He asks. Maybe this one can help him find the others. He thinks he's got the right room, but can't be sure.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Padawan Learner Caleb Dume. You're Boba Fett, right?<em>" He makes his way over to the table a few feet to the left, and sits in one of the chairs. Boba follows.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>That's me.<em>" Caleb nods thoughtfully.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>You look like the holos Grey shows me sometimes of him and his <em>vode</em> back when they were on Kamino. Before the war.<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Grey?<em>" Boba asks, taking another bite of his cookie.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>My master's commander. Why are you here? If you don't mind my asking.<em>" Boba nearly laughs at that. Doesn't anyone teach Jetti anything about self-preservation? If someone breaks into your house, you shoot, not have cookies and juice with them. He lifts a shoulder in half a shrug instead of saying that.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>I was curious.<em> Buir </em>won't tell me anything, and I'm pretty sure one of the<em> jetti </em>he was fighting with the other day was the<em> dinii </em>who tried to cut off his head on Geonosis.<em>" Caleb hums, finishing off his cookie. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>He was. Please don't kill him<em>." Boba raises an eyebrow.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Why not?<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>He's my grandmaster. Like... The Jedi version of  a<em> ba'buir."<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Did Commander Grey teach you Mando'a?<em>" Boba asks. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Yeah. Him and Styles, mostly. Master knows a bit too.<em>" </em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"Caleb's fun." <em>Boba tells the 'recorder, right as there's a really big multicolored explosion behind his chair. The feed goes dark for a moment, and when it comes back on everything is dyed in far too many different shades than should be allowed. There's plenty of screeching and shouting in the background. Boba snatches up the holorecorder, marches to the center of the hall and apparently begins to float. <br/>
</em></p><p>
  <em>He doesn't stop until he's reached the crisscrossing beams of painted durasteel at the ceiling, and we're treated to a wide, panning view of the room, which has been coated in color. <br/>
</em>
</p><p>"<em>Niduraa</em>, both of you!" <em>He yells at the two young men in perfectly clean clothing who are standing on the beams, bent in half with laughter. <br/>
</em></p><p>"<em>Haar'chak.</em>"<em> One of them whispers to the other, and they scamper off. <br/>
</em></p><p>"Stitches is going to murder me when I'm through with you two, and it's going to be worth it!" <em>Boba yells after them, and sinks slowly to the floor. He lifts the 'recorder so it's level with his face. </em>"That's the end of this installment, you can thank those two <em>jare'le</em>-"<em> The feed cuts to dark and silent before we can hear the rest of his insult.</em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>The feed flickers on, revealing Boba, now redressed in a beige tunic and pants. His skin and hair are still dyed pink, blue, and purple along the lines where the other two meet, albeit slightly less eye-burning shades of those colors. He's leaning against a tall shelf full of datapads, and his legs sink into a plush carpet from where they're crossed under him.<br/>
</em>
</p><p>"I'm back."<em> He greets, with somewhat less enthusiasm then the previous episodes. </em>"Fizz and Jeepers poured half a bottle of recreational sticki into whatever recipe they used to make that explosion, so it hasn't washed off yet. Anyway, I think this should be the last bit.</p><p>"All of them tried their hand at convincing <em>buir</em> over the three months between when they arrived and Sidious died, but in the end I think it was Ahsoka who convinced him."</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>He finds the Togruta kid sitting on the edge of a rooftop, legs swinging over the side. She can't be that much older than Boba. A commander. And yet, if she is older than his son, the same applies for the rest of his ade. And that's why they're here, isn't it?<br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He sits down next to her. <br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>So?<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>So what?<em>" She's snarky, then. It reminds him of his sister.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>What's your bid? How are you going to convince me to sign that thrice-damned piece of flimsi?<em>" He responds, as if it's not obvious.<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>I'm not.<em>" That, at least, is new. She shrugs, playing with one of her lekku somewhat abashedly. "</em>You won't sign it if you don't want to. Nothing I can do about that.<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Why are you still talking to me, then?<em>"<br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>Let me tell you a story<em>." She says instead of answering. </em></p><p>
  <em>Let me tell you a story about a little girl who lived in a tiny village with her family. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Let me tell you a story about this girl, about how she lived and loved and played and cried in that little village until one day, when she was three or four, everyone she cared about told her that she was different. Special. And so she couldn't stay with them, she had to leave. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Let me tell you a story about how everyone this little girl loved thought they were doing the right thing when they handed her over to a Zygerrian bounty hunter who claimed to be a Jedi.<br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Let me tell you a story about the man who rescued this girl, about his kindness and his bravery.<br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Let me tell you a story bout this girl and a reckless, stubborn, insane Jedi Knight, the closest thing to an brother she was allowed to have. <br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Let me tell you a story about four hundred men who decided they didn't care about the Jedi rules and became her family under old Mandalorian law.<br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Let me tell you a story about this girl and the aliit she isn't allowed to have. <br/>
</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Let me tell you a story, about the one man standing in the way of freeing her vode.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Ahsoka turns to him, her eyes burning with fire enough to burn down the galaxy.<br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>And so, Jango Fett, if you decide that your answer is no, I cannot change that. But rules be damned, if another one of my <em>vode </em>dies because of your refusal to save their lives, you will have my eternal hate, and an oath that I will hunt you down and kill you, or die trying.<em>" <br/>
</em></p><p>
  <em>The corner of his mouth lifts. <br/>
</em>
</p><p><em>"</em>You are<em> mandokarla." He says, almost laughs. "</em>Tell your jetti that I will sign it.<em>" She bares sharp teeth gaze peppering him with arrows, and gets up. <br/>
</em></p><p><em>"</em>My<em> vode</em> taught me how to hunt, Fett. I'm very good at it.<em>" She says, and trusts the wind to carry it back to him. </em></p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"And that's pretty much the end of the story. Buir signed the thing, and all of us moved to the temple. The vode who still wanted to fight joined forces with the Coruscant Security Force, and buir decided to bring me with everyone else, then go see about the peace summit. I've got the holos of the Republic and Separatist representatives faces when he showed up as the Mandalore systems official representative under sanction from the Mand'alor to offer a mediator for the peace talks. It was hilarious. Oh, yeah, and apparently, the other<em> dar'jetti</em>, whatsisface,"<em> Boba snaps his fingers. </em>"Tyranus. Oh, Dooku, yeah. In case you've been living under a rock, he killed the Supreme Chancellor, who was also a Sith lord. Yeah, that was fun. Anyway, hope you enjoyed, bye!"</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>sorry this one took so long, i think i said in the last on that i was moving?<br/>all done now, and i finally have a closet after two weeks of waiting, even if it is mildly ugly.<br/>hope you're all well, stay safe and have a great weekend.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. How the Chancellor's Impatience Saved The Galaxy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"This is terrible!" Anakin says, distraught.<br/>"Yes," Rex says impatiently, over the noise. "I-"<br/>"Someone's impersonating the Chancellor!"<br/>As one, every single person present at the strategy meeting goes quiet. Half the jaws in the room hit the floor.<br/>"What?" Anakin asks. "Why are you all staring at me?" <br/>"Fuck," Kenobi says decidedly from the holoprojector.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>yikes. i'm sorry, it's been ages since i've updated. </p><p>anyway, i kinda went, hm, what if anakin had been on the council earlier? because council fluff is very far up there in my favorite tropes. and this is what happened. i'm not sorry.</p><p>edit: just realized i never mentioned how much i hate palpatine's guts in this one. heads up; i detest his wrinkly face.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Sheev Palpatine is a patient man. Most Sith in the last thousand years are. <br/>
</span>
  <span>Sheev is different from all who came before him, in that he'll succeed in bringing down the Republic and their thrice-accursed Jedi, in setting himself up as emperor of the galaxy.<br/>
</span>
  <span>And he won't do it by force. No. Sheev is a patient man, and he will have them bowing willingly at his feet.<br/>
</span>
  <span>Or he would have, without the one spontaneous decision he'd ever made.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>For the first time, very possibly since he was nine, the Council chambers are entirely silent after Anakin Skywalker finishes speaking. <br/>
</span>
  <span>Windu's hands are wrapped tightly around his lightsaber; he appears to be pretending it's someone's neck. Anakin hopes it isn't his.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Absolutely. The fuck," Windu hisses. "Not."<br/>
</span>
  <span>"No, no, this is wonderful," Obi-Wan disagrees, flopped languidly over his chair. "Don't you see? We've been looking for someone to keep us more in touch with the Order's youth!"<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Hrm," Yoda considers. "See your point, I do, Obi-Wan. But much in his bowl already, young Skywalker has."<br/>
</span>
  <span>Biting back a surge of annoyance, Anakin nods frantically. "I do! Hey, you know who'd be perfect for this position? Padawan Offee. She's only a few years younger than me, and she's much better at managing her time! And she's not running an entire legion! And-"<br/>
</span>
  <span>"We cannot induct a padawan into the Council," Ki-Adi Mundi rumbles to his left. "This is not a war for younglings."<br/>
</span>
  <span>"I've only been a knight for three months !" he protests.<br/>
</span>
  <span>There are grudging nods all around, and a moment of silence as the councillors deliberate.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Hrm. A decision I have come to. Part of this Council, you will be," Yoda nods, satisfied, and settles back into his chair. "Label any food you put in the antechamber coldbox, you should, and paint your chair pink, you may not," Anakin gapes. Yoda bangs his gimmer stick on the edge of his chair. "Adjourned, this meeting is."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"It's a great honor, you know. To be on the Council," Obi-Wan muses, tucking his hands into his sleeves. He doesn't ask. He never has, and Anakin has begun to doubt he ever will. Maybe it would be easier, then, to tell him about-about everything, really. About Padmé. <br/>
</span>
  <span>But maybe he wouldn't be Obi-Wan, with his pointed statements, fashioned to hook on to the truth and drag it out of you so gently that you wouldn't notice-and all of this, only, of course, if you wanted to tell him.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"I know," he says, instead of any of it, and sighs heavily. "It's also a great responsibility." Obi-Wan's blue eyes glint with a hidden amusement.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Paperwork?" he asks, one delicate eyebrow raised.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Maybe a little bit," Anakin concedes grudgingly. "But it's more-people. People and their lives. I've already got-I've got an entire legion. And I'm not good at doing that, forget every Jedi in the entire order!"<br/>
</span>
  <span>"You are, actually," Obi-Wan says, mildly. They've stopped in a secluded hallway, one with a window opening up to the gentle colors of the gardens. He leans back against it, forearms braced on the sill. "Doing a good job. Better than nearly any other knight I could name. And I believe you can do this too if you try, Anakin." <br/>
</span>
  <span>This cuts through the folds of his forehead like a 'saber though flimsi.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Really?"<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Mhm. You take responsibility for your actions, you lead the charges and do your research, even if your plans are completely batshit insane-"<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Hey!"<br/>
</span>
  <span>"They do work, and they get the job done well most of the time."<br/>
</span>
  <span>"I-guess that's true," worrying at his lip, he sighs again. "Thanks, Obi-Wan."<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Anytime."</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Why does it matter that I kissed him, Quinlan?!" He had, apparently, chosen the worst possible moment to ask that. Or else his voice had been far louder than he'd thought it was. Possibly both, Obi-Wan thought, surveying the silent council room. He can feel the heat rise to spot his cheeks when his gaze finds Anakin's.<br/>
</span>
  <em>
    <span>«Master</span>
  </em>
  <span>?» his former Padawan asks, tone the mental equivalent of being high enough to shatter glass. </span>
  <em>
    <span>«What</span>
  </em>
  <span>?»<br/>
</span>
  <span>"I-uh-er..." Obi-Wan stutters incoherently. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Damn you, Quinlan</span>
  </em>
  <span>, he thinks. Mace coughs, and says: "I do believe we have more pressing matters to move on to." Obi-Wan resolves to bake him cookies. Next time he's on leave. And doesn't have half a digital ton of paperwork to catch up on.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"So," Ahsoka says. She's perched on Anakin's shoulder while he works through some datapads, holding one of her own; full of algebraic equations if he remembers correctly. "Who was it?" <br/>
</span>
  <span>"Whatever do you mean?" Obi-Wan asks, a sinking feeling in his heart. Anakin told her, didn't he. She wiggles his eyebrows suggestively, and he grimaces.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Please never make that face again."<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Who, master?" she asks again.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"A gentleman doesn't kiss and tell." he answers, completely deadpan. If he tells her, Rex will never hear the end of it. And neither will he, for that matter. Cody wouldn't let him.<br/>
</span>
  <span>Ahsoka groans and flops backwards, limp over Anakin's shoulder in a position that makes it seem as though she doesn't have a spine. She sneaks one last glance at him, then returns to her work, apparently bored of bothering him.<br/>
</span>
  <span>Obi-Wan hides a smile. Perhaps he'll arrange for her to have dinner with Padawan Offee, next time they're both on leave.<br/>
</span>
  <span>It's would be very un-Jedi-like of him to do that in revenge for the green dye he'd found in his conditioner, which, of course, is why it's probably not revenge.<br/>
</span>
  <span>Probably.<br/>
</span>
  <span>Sometimes, Obi-Wan isn't a particularly good Jedi.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Anakin is quickly learning that perhaps, just maybe, the Council aren't quite as uptight and traditional as he'd assumed before the Chancellor had asked him to take a seat on the council. <br/>
</span>
  <span>He'd come late, having lost track of time while sparring with Ahsoka. <br/>
</span>
  <span>As the doors slide open, he rehearses the apology under his breath, accompanied by soon to be broken promises that it won't happen again.<br/>
</span>
  <span>He doesn't find the council in their chairs, diplomatically discussing the merits of some campaign or another. <br/>
</span>
  <span>Instead, they're all sitting on the floor together, spiritedly arguing about... Rancors? Maybe? He isn't really sure. Obi-Wan's laying on his back, head cushioned in Kit Fisto's lap. The latter is complaining about something, though he doesn't seem to be disturbing Master Mundi, who's sitting nearby on a datapad. Every so often, Fisto will nudge Mundi,  and spread his hands in a 'Well?' gesture when the Cerean master nods distractedly in agreement.<br/>
</span>
  <span>Tiin is giggling at something, clutching his ribs and leaning against Windu's side. The Korun himself looks faintly amused, his equivalent for rolling on the ground in gales of laughter.<br/>
</span>
  <span>Masters Koon and Ti are sitting slightly to the side, apparently having a perfectly normal discussion apart from everyone else, except that they're both floating upside-down, the tips of Ti's montrals brushing the floor.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"To see them like this, good it it." someone says from above him, of all places. He looks up. Yoda's perched carefully on the ceiling beam, a long colorful scarflike object dangling from the needles flashing in his claws. "Come up, you will." the old master orders, and tugs him skyward with the Force before he can protest. <br/>
</span>
  <span>"Are they always like this?" he asks quietly, after a moment of silence.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Mmm," Yoda nods, foot talons clicking on the polished durasteel. <br/>
</span>
  <span>Anakin frowns. Then shrugs. He should catch up on his paperwork, but-<br/>
</span>
  <span>There's a two hour block in his schedule for the council meeting, barring any emergencies, and that should be just enough time to fix up his arm, and see about finding the space for installing that flamethrower Hardcase had suggested. <br/>
</span>
  <span>He pulls out a spanner.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Doing well, your padawan is?" Yoda asks.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Very well, grandmaster," Anakin answers. "Mostly of her own merit, but Captain Rex organized several of the men into training exercises for her. She's really coming along in Jar'kai.<br/>
</span>
  <span>Yoda hums again, and turns back to his knitting. Anakin watches him for a minute, then shrugs and sends Artoo a quick message. The droid can do paperwork so much faster than he can.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The main issue, Anakin thinks, with being on the council, is the sheer volume of paperwork. Luckily, he's gotten permission to ask some of his command staff for help, as most of the council has. They weren't raised knowing war protocols, and it goes so much faster when you have someone there to help decipher.<br/>
</span>
  <span>Perhaps, in another place, another time, one particular form would have ended up in Ki-Adi Mundi's care. In that time and place, perhaps Mundi would have been exhausted from months behind enemy lines, sleepless nights and desperate emergency planning sessions. <br/>
</span>
  <span>Then and there, he might have signed off one form in particular without reading it first. <br/>
</span>
  <span>Here and now, that ends up on Anakin's, and therefore Rex's, desk. <br/>
</span>
  <span>"Remind me why we're doing this again, Rexter?" Ahsoka moans, forehead thumping as it comes into contact with the datapad in front of her.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Because you need to work on reading protocol-speech, and the general asked us for-" he cuts off his own distracted answer with a sharp inhale.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Rex?" she asks. "You good?" It takes him a moment to reply. <br/>
</span>
  <span>"No," he says, far too calm. "No, I don't think I am. Not if I'm understanding this."<br/>
</span>
  <span>She means over to look at his 'pad.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"What does it mean?" <br/>
</span>
  <span>Rex purses his lips.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"It's a medical leave request for CC's and CT's one through fifteen hundred. Followed by a Kamino quartermaster's requisition form for three thousand control chips."<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Control chips?" Ahsoka asks. "Like for droids?"<br/>
</span>
  <span>"No," Rex answers grimly. "Like for humans. And the first one is fresh off the Supreme Chancellor's desk."</span>
</p><p> </p><p><span>"This is terrible!" Anakin says, distraught.<br/>
</span><span>"Yes," Rex says impatiently, over the noise. "I-"<br/>
</span><span>"Someone's impersonating the Chancellor!"<br/>
</span><span>As one, every single person present at the strategy meeting goes quiet. Half the jaws in the room hit the floor.<br/>
</span><span>"What?" Anakin asks. "Why are you all staring at me?" <br/>
</span><span>"Fuck," Kenobi says decidedly from the holoprojector.<br/>
</span><span>"Fuck," Ahsoka agrees, and grins back at Obi-Wan when he shoots her a dirty glare.<br/>
</span><span>"Sir-" Rex keeps his tone level, reaching up to put a hand on Anakin's arm.<br/>
</span><span>He jerks away. "What is it Rex? What aren't you all </span><em><span>telling</span></em><span> me?"<br/>
</span><span>"Palpatine's the Sith," Jesse says, examining his nails. There's a beat of silence. Kix lunges.<br/>
</span><span>Jesse's head thunks against the floor, and cuts off his yowling due to the fortunate (for them) condition of being passed out.<br/>
</span><span>"...</span><em><span>What</span></em><span>." <br/>
</span><span>"Anakin-" Kenobi tries, blue hand flickering as he reaches out.<br/>
</span><span>"No!" he whirls, glaring at the hologram. "You-when were you going to tell me? At  the </span><em><span>pyre</span></em><span>?"<br/>
</span><span>"No, we just-"<br/>
</span><span>"Didn't think I could handle it?" Anakin snarls. "I'm </span><em><span>twenty</span></em> <em><span>two</span></em><span>, Obi-Wan. I've fought in this war </span><em><span>right next to you</span></em><span> for the past three years. I'm on the </span><em><span>Jedi Council</span></em><span>, if in name only. I'm not a </span><em><span>child</span></em><span>!"<br/>
</span><span>"I know," Obi-Wan says quietly. "Believe me, I know. Little gods, I wish you </span><em><span>were</span></em><span>," And then, at his expression. "Because </span><em><span>I</span></em><span> didn't have that chance. To grow up in my </span><em><span>own</span></em><span> time. I wanted to give </span><em><span>you</span></em><span> that. And I failed."<br/>
</span><span>Anakin looks taken aback slightly, and opens his mouth to say something, but Obi-Wan plows onward.<br/>
</span><span>"I </span><em><span>failed</span></em><span> you. And I didn't want to tell you, not because I think you can't handle it, and not because you're not actually on the Council-which is, incidentally, untrue; you are-but because the man is your friend." <br/>
</span><span>"Is he?" Anakin whispers, and deflates, all the fight knocked out of him. <br/>
</span><span>"I thought so," <br/>
</span><span>"So did I,"<br/>
</span><span>There's a beat of silence.<br/>
</span><span>"What are we going to do about it?" someone asks.<br/>
</span><span>Obi-Wan turns in their direction, sporting an absolutely terrifying grin. <br/>
</span><span>"Don't worry," he says. "</span><em><span>I</span></em><span> have a plan."</span></p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"What the fuck? No, seriously, what the </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>?!" Cody's voice climbs an octave higher with every syllable. No one in the room answers his question, most too busy staring at the 'pad Obi-Wan's holding with a mixture of horror and disgust.<br/>
</span>
  <span>"Where did you </span>
  <em>
    <span>get</span>
  </em>
  <span> those?" Kit asks, lowered tone halfway to revering. <br/>
</span>
  <span>"I made them, obviously," Obi-Wan replies, smacking Quinlan away as he tries to take the steal the datapad for a closer look. "Hands </span>
  <em>
    <span>off</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Vos! I took several classes in photo editing and digital art when I was younger."<br/>
</span>
  <span>"To get out of Underwater Basket Weaving, if I remember correctly," Stass teases, gently nudging him. <br/>
</span>
  <span>"Can I come out </span>
  <em>
    <span>now</span>
  </em>
  <span>?" Anakin whines from the corner. <br/>
</span>
  <span>"No!" <br/>
</span>
  <span>Harrumphing loudly, he plops down and starts poking at Ahsoka.<br/>
</span>
  <span>She is, as it turns out, in the middle of running Jar'kai drills with a class of knights and also not pleased at being interrupted.<br/>
</span>
  <em>
    <span>«What is it, Skyguy?» </span>
  </em>
  <span>she snaps.<br/>
</span>
  <em>
    <span>«Obi-Wan's being mean to me again</span>
  </em>
  <span>» he complains. </span>
  <em>
    <span>«He made me sit in the corner while he shows the rest of them his plan</span>
  </em>
  <span>»<br/>
</span>
  <span>She flinches so hard he can almost hear her.<br/>
</span>
  <em>
    <span>«His Chancellor plan?</span>
  </em>
  <span>» she asks hesitantly.<br/>
</span>
  <span>«</span>
  <em>
    <span>Yeah, why? Did he show </span>
  </em>
  <span>you?!»<br/>
</span>
  <em>
    <span>«No, no. But you don't want to see. Trust me, it's for your own good</span>
  </em>
  <span>» <br/>
</span>
  <span>And then she's gone, just before Quinlan manages to get his hands on the 'pad and swipe to the next picture, causing:</span>
</p>
<ol>
<li><span>At least two thirds of the gathered Jedi to erupt in all manner of screeching, screaming and shouting.</span></li>
<li><span>Yoda to leap, froglike, for Barriss (there at the request of Master Healer Che to ensure the plan didn't exceed Obi-Wan's weekly quote of suicidal-ness) and attempt to shield her eyes from the picture, in the process;</span></li>
<li><span>Slashing his claws across her cheek, leaving behind three shallow red scratches that begin to well with blood.</span></li>
<li><span>Obi-Wan to chuck the pad across the room, where it bounces off a wall and slides to a stop in front of;</span></li>
<li>
<span>Anakin, who leans over to look and immediately begins to pray for spontaneous brain combustion, I'd only to erase the image now seared into his brain.</span><span><br/>
</span>
</li>
</ol><p>"<em>Obi</em>-Wan!" Shaak scolds, angry and blue in the flickering projection of her seat comm. She opens her mouth to continue, but seemingly can't think of anything to say. Cody.exe appears to have packed up and gone on vacation. He stares at the wall, likely wishing for the same mercy as Anakin.<br/>
<span>"</span><em><span>Ouch</span></em><span>, master, that </span><em><span>hurts</span></em><span>," Barriss winces, prodding at the cuts on her cheek with a finger. <br/>
</span><span>"My apologies, you have," Yoda says, shaking his head. "Protect you, I had to."<br/>
</span><span>"From what?" she asks curiously.<br/>
</span><span>"</span><em><span>Nothing</span></em><span>!" everyone choruses.<br/>
</span><span>Well.<br/>
</span><span>Everyone except for Quinlan, who cheerily answers: "Palpatine, Dooku and Grievous in bed together!"<br/>
</span><span>In one fluid motion, Cody pulls out his blaster and shoots Quinlan in the calf.<br/>
</span><span>"Fuck! What was that for?!" he shouts, crumpling.<br/>
</span><span>"You deserve it," Saesee tells him unashamedly. <br/>
</span><span>Barriss only stares, horrified.<br/>
</span><span>Anakin wails unintelligibly from the corner.<br/>
</span><span>"What </span><em><span>was</span></em><span> that?" Plo rumbles, whirling towards Obi-Wan, who looks </span><em><span>very </span></em><span>uncomfortable.<br/>
</span><span>"The uncensored version to plant in Palpatine's personal terminals?" he answers, though it sounds more like a question.<br/>
</span><span>"What I want to know," Kit says, pointing his index finger towards the ceiling. "Is how you knew </span><em><span>what</span></em><span>-aah, okay, don't shoot!"<br/>
</span><span>Cody glares down the barrel of his blaster.<br/>
</span><span>"One more word," he growls. "I </span><em><span>dare</span></em><span> you."<br/>
</span><span>Windu's chair beeps a warning, and then the man himself flickers into view. He looks around the room, and pinches the bridge of his nose. <br/>
</span><span>"I don't want to know, do I?" he says.<br/>
</span><span>"Suffer with us," Anakin urges him, and flicks the 'pad across the smooth floors.</span></p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Several days later, Sheev Palpatine finds himself in a Jedi holding cell pending trial on grounds of an investigation into his personal affairs started by an account, accompanied with unfortunately detailed photographic proof of his most </span>
  <em>
    <span>literally </span>
  </em>
  <span>consortion with the enemy.<br/>
</span>
  <span>They are, as he, Dooku, Grievous and, to his ignorance, about fifteen Jedi know, completely fake.</span><br/>

  <span>He cannot, however, disprove them, as at the timestamp of the evidence, he'd been accepting reports from several of his Separatist generals in the hidden rooms of his Coruscanti apartments, dressed in full Sith garb.<br/>
</span>
  <span>He's branded as a traitor, and then post the interesting discovery of his collection of holocrons and comm logs, executed as a Sith.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Obi-Wan sits back and smiles contently, Rex's arms wrapped around his shoulders. It's a good day. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>okay maybe i'm a little sorry.</p><p>and hey, if any of you wanna stop by my <a href="https://starfall14.tumblr.com//%5Bstarfall14%5D">tumblr</a> and drop an ask, please do. it'd make my day. i've got some art there, so feel free to check that out too!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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